being nostalgic and dumb etc
Posted on: April 27, 2015, at 02:46:14am

I feel like I could split my entire FFR experience into two major chapters: The time before and after the major site crash. Sounds like something I could craft into a book entitled "FFR: Through the ages" lol

The former time period was really a blast. I was extremely focused on playing this game and even made a couple of very close friends in the process. But most of my time was trying to improve at this game and I was really motivated to do so.

Ever since I came back some time after the site came back up, my whole approach to this website has changed. I'm more or less on here now just to talk to people (I specifically started playing TWG because it piqued my interest) and I spend very little time playing the game at all. Most of the time I can't find the motivation to really play at all anymore.

I find it really hard to decide which era was better, but I do tend to really miss the way I *used* to approach FFR, which seemingly would mean that previous experiences seem better. It's not that the game is more important or something, but when I did meet people back then, I really took the time to get to know them, even if I didn't talk to that many people.

I feel inclined to try and artificially replicate everything from that time to justify myself to still exist on this website. I keep thinking back to the times of FFR vid chat, the extremely dorky tournaments I would host, my overall competitiveness in any tournaments, the profile pets we had, my vague understanding of av-misses, the photo scavenger hunt I did, my OBSESSION with tokens, etc

I just see all this stuff and think to myself, "certainly I could make new experiences now that I'm back". However, maybe I'm struggling so much to get started because my will to be here isn't strong anymore.

Many people that greatly influenced me have moved on. Even I have largely moved on now. I work much more and essentially don't play the game anymore. It's probably just not feasible anymore to find that experience I once had and should just appreciate it for what it was.

I wonder when my time should be to go. Maybe I'm already overdue?

The point is, I have mixed feelings about being here. I'm not sure how they'll end up sorting themselves out, but until then I'll just go along for the ride and see what happens.

1. 1: awein999
   Posted at 12:20pm on May 10th, 2015

   As long as any aspect of the site is fun it can have value. (For example I was basically hardly visiting this site for like 6 months but found the TCG which has been really cool for me and brought me back to being semi-active at least). I really think you never have to declare a leave from the site. If the entire experience of being here becomes stale it makes sense just to fade away without any announcement, as most of the people who actually leave ffr do. Just make sure to keep contact with cool people you met here if you do perma-leave ;)
2. 2: Hakulyte
   Posted at 11:12am on June 3rd, 2015

   Aren't you curious to figure out why you AAA'd X-Tinction now and not before and how you could AAA/FC new songs by continuing to adjust your settings and try new approaches? This game is a constant new puzzle and the real wall is if you continue to play the same way until you no longer understand what else to try. Sometimes you have to mess with settings, go outside to get some concentration back, chat with others to forget about bad habits or basically, maintain the best balance between all the tools needed to get that score you always wanted. I legit think this game is forcing us to change our lives to become as balanced as possible. In some way, not playing the game as much and deciding to go play TWG and do different things on the site may indirectly change you into a better player since this game require a vast array of different skills.
   ..and what awein said is true as well. No matter where you're at, people here are like an awesome 2nd family and will always be happy to we
3. 3: Hakulyte
   Posted at 11:13am on June 3rd, 2015

   welcome you back. :)
   whoa, I cut the 1000 character max barrier woops, I must secretly love you or something.