How would (do) you raise your children?

[Reincarnate]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

I can't see any reason not to show your kids things you enjoy.

You can show it obviously -- just don't force it. A ton of parents fall into this trap... "When I was your age I..." type arguments.

[FontSize72LOL]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

I'm older and wiser than you are and therefore any argument I put forth is automatically correct because you're just a kid who doesn't know anything yet. Now shut up and get me another beer!

A lot of the time that is correct. Some Parents have life experiences influencing their decisions that the kid couldn't even comprehend. I agree the parent is not right all the time, but there should be a certain amount of respect for your parent nonetheless. Ageist being used in a parent/child situation is just retarded.

[Hazelle]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

Kids? Nop. Dogs? Yes.

[adlp]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

im going to be an awesome parent you guys dont even know

spanking will be included

[Reincarnate]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

A lot of the time that is correct. Some Parents have life experiences influencing their decisions that the kid couldn't even comprehend. I agree the parent is not right all the time, but there should be a certain amount of respect for your parent nonetheless. Ageist being used in a parent/child situation is just retarded.

This is what I mean, though. Going by age is just an "appeal to authority" fallacy. An adult can be very experienced but still be incredibly suboptimal in terms of decision making and judgment.

A good system/argument trumps everything, and that can be had at any age. If there's something your child doesn't comprehend, then you should make it a point to help them comprehend. You don't just fall back to "Well, I'm older than you, and I just know, so get over it and accept it." That's just as bad as "Because I said so." It's non-explanation and doesn't have any built-in checks/balances against being a *bad* explanation or decision.

[hi19hi19]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

My child will be raised properly, starting with Pokemon Red/Blue first. :')

I was going to reply but then I saw this.
Case closed.

[Izzy]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

I kind of wish my parents introduced me to the things they grew up with. I think they just didn't have them anymore. As far as media goes it wasn't as easy as it is now to hold onto.

[adlp]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

also my kids will be smarter and more beautiful than everybody else's here.

just so happens i have superior jeans

[andy-o24]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nH5ou8z-vxs

That's not exactly the point of the commercial, obviously, but I like to look at it for these situations. The whole, take the opportunity when frustrated with your child to teach them something.

As far as any kids I end up with I think it will vary with the situations my kids present to me. I will try to talk to them, make them understand what they have done wrong, and let them think over it until they can truly apologize for what they've done. I will encourage whatever it is they want to do, within reason. I will read to them from an early age and try to keep their minds sharp by encouraging them to put together puzzles and things of that nature.

I know my parents spanked me and sent me to my room and had remedial punishments like opening/closing the door ten times if I slammed it. Retrospectively, these don't seem like they did much, but I can understand using them and having them be somewhat effective on smaller children.

I remember in third or fourth grade, I was charged with sexual harassment (I think that was a stretch, but I guess it's on my record as such). I remember coming home, getting lectured about it, and being told I was grounded from T.V/computer/going outside for three months. The grounding lasted maybe a week and I feel I was short-changed sufficient time to think it over as a child.

As an 'adult' now, not a week has gone by where I haven't had that pop into my head. I still see the girls I allegedly harassed, and there is still some tension (at least for me) between us. What I'm trying to get across is that maybe less punishment, letting it run it's course within your child until they actually realize what they've done and apologize, is a better course of action. Self-punishment lasts longer than temporary punishments such as spanking.

-o24

[nois-or-e]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

Well this certainly turned into an interesting discussion. A lot of posts echoing points I made from actual experience in the first reply, neat.

I must say that it is good that Marcus pointed out the 'bs answer' vs. 'A chance to educate your child'. I couldn't agree more. When marissa had just turned 3, she asked me why she could see through the windows on the bus. So I explained transparency, and how some things are transparent, which allows us to see through them. Since then, if Marissa encounters a new object/situation and notices something is 'see-through' she'll tell me or someone else how that object is transparent because she can see through it. With one little 2 minute explanation, I have enhanced her understanding of her world around her, and she will carry this into her further years of education and life.

Keep in mind that this is but one of a multitude of scenarios where I have used a proper explanation and taken the chance to educate my daughter on something, as opposed to the fast/easy/lazy route of "just because". I'd hate to think of the sheltered perception of her environment she would have if it weren't for these little situations

[Staiain]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

[popsicle_3000]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

Well this certainly turned into an interesting discussion. A lot of posts echoing points I made from actual experience in the first reply, neat.

I must say that it is good that Marcus pointed out the 'bs answer' vs. 'A chance to educate your child'. I couldn't agree more. When marissa had just turned 3, she asked me why she could see through the windows on the bus. So I explained transparency, and how some things are transparent, which allows us to see through them. Since then, if Marissa encounters a new object/situation and notices something is 'see-through' she'll tell me or someone else how that object is transparent because she can see through it. With one little 2 minute explanation, I have enhanced her understanding of her world around her, and she will carry this into her further years of education and life.

Keep in mind that this is but one of a multitude of scenarios where I have used a proper explanation and taken the chance to educate my daughter on something, as opposed to the fast/easy/lazy route of "just because". I'd hate to think of the sheltered perception of her environment she would have if it weren't for these little situations

All for this. I won't shy away from explaining how things are. I remember when I was around 7 asking my dad how sex worked. He told me the entire thing, no fluffing around. Said matter of factly of course. I was like, ok! That's how it works. No lasting harm or loss of innocence. Someone that age can take something at face value as just a fAct of nature

[hi19hi19]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

All for this. I won't shy away from explaining how things are. I remember when I was around 7 asking my dad how sex worked. He told me the entire thing, no fluffing around. Said matter of factly of course. I was like, ok! That's how it works. No lasting harm or loss of innocence. Someone that age can take something at face value as just a fAct of nature

Also echoing this.
I'm pretty upfront and frank about everything I do, and I'll be that way with my kids too.
I was brought up that way and I am absolutely glad I was. The world already has so much ignorance, why add to it when you can teach instead?

[Nullifidian]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

You can show it obviously -- just don't force it. A ton of parents fall into this trap... "When I was your age I..." type arguments.

Oh no, like I explained in my initial post, I wouldn't push my kids into anything they don't want.

[kommisar]

Re: How would (do) you raise your children?

freedom to make mistakes and feel consequences for themselves


bubble wrapping your child is the worst idea of parenting and will isolate your child. it'll never get the chance to learn from making mistakes and feel the real value of failure, rather than just be told it's wrong and not really know why.