page 4 of my story!
Posted on: August 11, 2008, at 11:00:24am

“A vampire? Wow! That’s cool. I lived with vampires for a while but…”she paused and sighed, “some idiot went around saying they were real and that they would kill off the human race. So I had to move with humans.”
“Wait you aren’t human?” Jack thought was getting lucky. A lot of the vampires are not his type. But Winter was different. She wasn’t one of those vampires who are always the same but she was a little more hyper.
“I’m half human. The other half,” she giggled, “you will find out when the time is right.”
“Hmm, I like the sound of that.” I answered smiling at her and looking at the sky.
“What time is it?” Winter asked looking into my eyes.
“It’s 2:33. Do you have to be home?” I asked looking at my friend.
“No I just was wondering because I’m sure you have to be home.”
“Yeah I do. Would you like to come over?”
“No, no I have to get my school supplies still.” She laughed and smiled.
“Oh ok,” I answered with a little disappointment, “am I going to see you at school tomorrow?”
“Why of course!” she said smiling.
“Well I’ll see you then. Oh Winter.”
“Yes?”
“Thanks for not thinking I am a freak and being my friend.”
“You are like everyone else just a vampire. So you’re very welcome. I will see you later.” She hugged me and started walking home.
“Later Winter.” I yelled as she was already 20 feet away.
I started walking home and thinking about how I am going to have to make up an excuse for not going to the deans’ office. Why don’t they send anyone else to the stupid deans’ office? It’s so stupid! As I continued thinking my parents were walking towards me. They had very fancy clothes on. My father wore a tuxedo and my mother really didn’t want to go fancy so she just wore a nice long black skirt and a black tank top with fishnets.
“Jack you need to get dressed up.” My father said pulling me on his back.
“Alright but I don’t need to get on your back dad.” I answered looking at him.
“If you want to get home fast yes you do.” My father replied running as my mother was home already.
“You will wear your good tuxedo ok?” my mother remarked pushing me upstairs.
“Alright, alright.” I went upstairs to find my tux. Really when you have to meet someone do you have to get all dressed up? I searched through my closet filled with clothes from at least 3 countries. Finally after my arms started to burn I found my tux in the bottom of my closets.
I started putting my tux on until I felt someone’s hand on my shoulder. I turned around and saw Riku. He was dressed in a tuxedo as well. But something about Riku was a little off I felt it with when I first met him.
“Riku. What are you doing in my room?” I asked looking at my vampire friend.
“I was told to come hang out with you while our parents cook food.” He answered sitting on my bed.
“Oh. That makes sense. Well Riku. Why don’t you tell me about yourself?” I asked looking in mirror to make sure I looked alright.

1. 1: carlin
   Posted at 2:12pm on August 11th, 2008

   I think this is your best page yet in terms of making sense, not that the others don't, it's just that this one really flows nicely. What's weird is that all the pages kind of don't go together. I think 2 and 4 are part of the same, but then 1 and 3 were about something different. Maybe you can make it a little more clear. Can't wait for the next part! =D
2. 2: shadowrougesonic
   Posted at 2:14pm on August 11th, 2008

   really? yay! i have more i will try my best to make the 2nd chapter more clear
3. 3: EtherCloud
   Posted at 3:52pm on August 13th, 2008

   good stuff try to flesh out the spoilers though. The details are getting better going into clothing but what is the surroundings like? the street the time of day the sky the inanimate objects randomly scattered about the landscape. Your working on it though cause i can see the difference. Sidenote: I know your a freak, so am I, I'll be your friend :)
4. 4: shadowrougesonic
   Posted at 3:53pm on August 13th, 2008

   yay! thank you ^^
5. 5: punisher1000
   Posted at 7:46am on August 18th, 2008

   U DONT NEED TO CHANGE ANYTHING IT KICS ASS
6. 6: shadowrougesonic
   Posted at 8:29am on August 18th, 2008

   hehehe thank you ^^ i shall post the next page later