Online Gaming Rant
Posted on: March 31, 2009, at 09:58:37pm

This rant is for all the people who play on LIVE or the PSN network... except for the Halo-ish part. So, whenever you get online ready to hop into whatever random game you feel tempted to play, you just jump into a random game and then hope that your experience is not suddenly tarnished if not destroyed by three certain things. These include lag, squeakers, and douchebags (AKA the general populace). These problems are most prevalent in FPS games, but at the same time... that's the only kind of game people really play now... for the most part.

Lag. Everyone knows it, and everyone hates it. In Halo you get a black screen and are killed without being able to see what happened and then are subjected to the humiliation of extreme wall humping after you spawn and then walk aimlessly about the map. In CoD you suddenly get a message on your screen announcing the lag and start jerking around for ten seconds or so with no idea if you're the only one lagging or not. In Rock Band you simply disconnect from the group and instantly fail your song. Lag is in every single online game and is always present to some extent, but it's the moments when you suddenly realize that every single round from your sniper has been exhausted into someone's skull and they still managed to kill you that you really remember that the lag is there. Lag sucks... period. Oh, and to the hosts in CoD:WaW recently... you all suck.

Squeakers. The main affliction of all FPS games. These are the 8-12 year old brats who cried to their parents until they bought them some random popular shooter and Xbox LIVE and then ran into their rooms, locked their door, and then screamed incoherently into the mic bruising everyone's eardrums in the process. These little kids all seem to think that they're some brand of professional gamer if they manage to even go positive in whatever game they play and god forbid if they win against you. Or if you beat them... They'll curse you out screaming about how they owned you, how you were cheating, how you suck at life, and so on and so forth. The only really good thing about squeakers is that they seem allergic to intelligence. Go ahead and taunt them using a 5th grader's vocabulary and get ready for the hilarious reactions. Or just kill them until they shut up.

The general population on Xbox LIVE is just... ew. Basically, they think that having anonymity over the internet while gaming gives them the right to curse at everyone in the game, and really let themselves go over the mic. You'll never have seen a bigger collection of racists and sexists than when you decided to go and play Halo 3 in Ranked Team Slayer. Basically you get to be treated to a bunch of people who act how they really think rather than how they let others see them. It's rather insulting to the human race really. You just get to see how horrible people really are... and how stupid as well.

Random Halo 3 rant is go: Halo 3 is mediocre at best. It's a lag filled game with perhaps one of the worst online communities ever to grace Xbox LIVE. It's also the most over hyped game of all time. If you ever had the chance to play Halo 2 while it was in its prime then you should know where I'm coming from when I say that Halo 3 subtly raped every aspect of the game you loved in Halo 2. The game suddenly became a slow paced camp-fest decided by power weapons over skill for the most part, and the lag didn't help much. In Halo 2 when you got lag things slowed down. In Halo 3 when you get lag things stop working. Also, Halo 3 is the only game I've ever played in where people don't die consistently when shot in the face by a sniper. Halo 3 just happens to be the most played by the general populace and introduced a new generation of gamers to the online community... which makes it possibly as bad as the Wii attracting 6 year old kids to gimmicky gaming.