Misc. progress thread

[Mahou]

Not sure what's going on with me but lately I have been wanting to just give up on everything I have started. I have been noticing that my depression has been getting slightly worse but not to the point where my thoughts are becoming suicidal - there is some sense of pride in me that prevents me from trying to seek help from a professional (overcoming this is pretty difficult). There have been 3 instances where I have tried to talk to some sort of therapist, but nothing has really happened. Since the weather has been improving, I've been trying different activities to get myself out of the weight room - running, biking, and walking.
Just an observation but the more I do this, the more I'm convincing myself that this is some sort of self-induced torture. From a day to day basis, I feel like I'm not worth shit, granted I'm putting in a lot of effort to never go back to the old person that I used to be. the grass is not greener on the other side and I really am not sure what to do at this point.

Tldr- thanks to the people that have motivated to get this far (arch, scwolf, and reach are the first ones that come to mind). I probably will not post anymore progression photos for awhile until I figure out what the fuck is wrong with my head.