TWG CI: Fiction's Birthday Party

[FictionJunction]

Originally Posted by pntballa18

To the blues: Don't be satisfied with just doing your special action. That wont win us the game, but getting dirty and analyzing with the rest of us very well could.

Ok so I get that everybody and their mother wants to win the game but I'm not much of a fan about telling the blues what to do because we're presumably not blue. There will be special instances where the game will require humans i.e. everybody to tell the blues what to do but now is not the time.

Instead of wasting our time giving popcorn level advice to seem active I will describe the existential crises all of our favourite blues will be going through.

SEER: The seer isn't useless. The seer is here to find reds. In fact, the seer is so good at finding reds our lord and savior in the heavens gimped him and prevented him from getting anything but red seerings. Fancy that. Knowing that the red miller is out there the seer needs to be able to determine that his first red seering is actually worth dying for because, you know, there's no private talking. Like it says in the OP.

BOdyGuarD: He's a cool dude willing to sacrifice himself for the greater good. He knows he's useful but what he doesn't know is that he's only as useful as his cardflip. bodyguards struggle figuring out when to throw themselves in the way of a bullet because if he thinks someone is getting targeted and that someone is useless well sorry useless guy you're dead, our bodyguard has nerves of steel and never moves for anyone unless he thinks they're important. Did I mention the bodyguard doubts his intelligence like ALL the time? Yeah. Don't die for anyone not worth dying for. You bench 500. Don't die for a loser skinny kid from the itnernet, yo.

TaTTle: You know that moment when you're in your apartment and someone kind of falls down and you have to make a call whether to phone the ambulance and get a $30000 bill because this is fucking America or apply icy hot to the sad sap's leg because he's whining like he can't take it? Well the tattle is basically the ambulance because you're bad at making judgment calls. There will be a time the everyone will be like we need an ambulance RIGHT THe FUCK NoW! And the ambulance won't know where to go because everyone is giving him wrong directions. Lucky for the ambulance driver, nobody will ever know who he is. But he'd feel bad if people were calling for him and he wasn't available.

Sounds like his existential problem is more like everyone else's problem.

Red Miller: HEY HUMANS YOU MIGHT THINK THIS ISN'T LIKE YOUR PROBLEM BUT IT'S TOTALLY YOUR PROBLEM BECAUSE IF YOU'RE THE MILLER AND YOU GET SEERED YOU'RE GONNA feel p bad if the seer comes OUT revealing that you're RED because you both sucked at TWG. Wolves may try to hide in the crowd but wolves can't hide in the crowd unless you let them.

fucking WIZARD (MOM): This motherufkcer right here is INSANE. You know what his problem is? He doesn't care. He ust doesn't care at all. He goes around prancing his magic wand like dumbledores assistant and shit and he prevents people from getting targeted AND prevents them from targeting anyone. He fucks the entire guessing system for every red and blue in the game. Whcih is totally cool. But totally balls too.

If you don't understand the wizard let me explain. The wizard (MY MOM) prevents actions from taking place. He doesn't guard, per se. He prevents kills from being sent and kills from landing. In a similar fashion he prevents seerings from being sent and seerings from landning. He prevents bodyguards from guarding (and dying) and people from getting bodyguard (not killing the bodyguard). He prevents the tattle from selecting someone to reveal and someone selected by the tattle from being revealed. ETC ETC.

YOu know what sucks about the wizard? He knows he's leaving every single blue and red in the dark. Seers will never know if their seering didn't go through because he got blocked or because his guy got blocked. And he can't talk about it can he? Reds won't know if their kill got blocked because they got picked or because the guy the wolves wanted dead for picked? AND GUESS WHAT? Neither does the wizard. SO FUCK YOU WIZARD ENJOY YOUR HEADACHE.

PizzaguY; Plz nobody order pizza. we don't want pizza now or on day2. We should know when we want pizza. When the time is right we will order pizza. this whole planning when we're going to be hungry thing isn't smart guys.