So it's been a while... How has you beennn? I've been good! I've been happier, seriously! I got a boyfriend which I'm happy with, I got a sunburn today :( I went to a cancer event and I was there all DAY! It was fun meeting survivors though, it was very moving. School almost ends!

Hi! So I have a lot to say about these two weeks so, have fun reading I guess. So first off, I have sorta admitted to my friend Julian that I liked him, and Julian, my best friend Selma, and I were in a group text thing when I admitted. Selma said she liked him too, and wanted to go out with him and all this, but in reality she likes Julian's best friend, Andrew. I got upset and people were telling me I over-reacted because I was down about it.. DF?

Okay, another thing is I had a karate tournament yesterday, and I sucked. No medals :( but after it was my brother's friends birthday so me and my brother went over to hang out. So this kid Eldin, I know him from karate, was over too. I was laying on Kenan's bed (the kid who has a birthday) and Eldin decided to put his feet on me, and he was smirking and then put his feet off. Then we had to go after a while, and I asked for hugs and Eldin hugged me, and picked me up by my waist. I never thought of him like THAT, but its starting to make me insane.

Hi!!~ So I have some updates.

So first off, me and MY BESTFRIEND Wunny123~ aka Mikey, sorta got in an argument. He told me how I act like I'm in this depression thing alone, and how I always want to just go to suicide and leave my life. Honestly, yes I think I'm in this alone. But not as im the only one with depression. I mean, I'm the only one who understands, me. My friends could go off saying how they understand me and all, which in reality sometimes its not like that. I sometimes don't even understand MYSELF. So yeah, I don't really want to expect anyone else to understand. Mikey if you're reading this, please now I practically sob everyday and night because I fucked up.

Okay, now onto Johnny. He got a girlfriend, and it's not me lol. I actually was really happy for him. I wasn't sad or mad... I think I'm starting to get over him.. Nice. Now I could actually have a friendship with him.


Onto one of my friends. Remember Peter? If you don't; long story short he picked his girl i hated over me. He texts my best friend olivia, and asked her out and stuff. I don't care about Peter. I'm mad they TEXT when she obviously knows he hurt me. And when her ex tried texting me? I lashed out and now he's scared of me... Well that's it I guess.

Hey! So basically all this day was episodes of Yu-Gi-Oh! Don't know that? You aren't my friend Dx

Hai! So yesterday, being the idiots we are, Johnny and I stayed up until 6 A.M. Arent we smart?!! But he actually told me he had depression and anxiety, and I was really suprised. He's not the one for that. I could tell. But people act like they're fine. Like me... We sent each other poems during our worst depression time. Here's one from me.

Poem 2
"I'm fine."
Does anyone notice what these lies mean? Does anyone notice my pain?

No one knows true pain, not even I. But here I am, whining. Trying to find someone who have felt true pain.

Why is emotional pain so much, but physical pain so scarce? Is this a book I'm living? If it is, where's my happy ending?

My happy ending is here.. The rope and stool.

My eyes ran out of tears to shed, so blood from my wrist started to shed instead. We all go a little mad sometimes,

But for me, its here forever.

Here's one from him.

"Maybe the meaning of life is love
Someone to look after, watch from above.
Or maybe i rely to heavily on hope
Enough of this bullshit no time to mope
Lets get ourselves angry
introduce us to hate
I am your master
I choose ur fate"