Premaritial Sex

[WeissPraline]

Even though I'm not christian, I agree with Premartial sex. I think you should know for a fact that person will be with you forever before you have sex; I know a lot of people who were 'MADLY IN LOVE AND WERE TOGETHER FOREVER', only to break up two months later, then hate that person.

Marriage seems to me, depending on your personality, the way to see that you're ready to have sex. If you truely want to spend forever with someone, split everything you own with them, and have a celebration for it, then by all means, I say you're ready.

Mind you, I don't say that because I'm religious- I say that because I feel if you marry someone, you truly do love them, and are ready for it. Most of the time, anyways.

[devonin]

So...sometimes you think you're in love but you aren't...so you shouldn't have premarital sex.

But...sometimes you get married and aren't either...but you -can- have sex then?

Your logic seems a little off to me.

[WeissPraline]

Well, probobly because we don't have the same definition of marriage.

When I think marriage, I don't think of it as something to be taken lightly. Most people, like people in Hollywood, get married for the hell of it.

When I think getting married, I think you would know you were in love with that person- unless something changed you're feelings.

What I'm saying is, I think marriage is a celebration of two peoples love. I know most marriages end up badly now a days, but not all of them do.

Besides, why would you get married if you weren't really 'in love'?

[devonin]

Look at the divorce rate of your country before you decide to say that even "Most" people get married while being so deeply in love that they are together forever. As I recall, the divorce rate is somewhere on the order of 50%

I know people who have no intention of getting married who are -much- more in love, and much more important to one another than dozens of married couples I know. The ceremony only holds meaning for those to whom it holds meaning. This is not universal by any means.

[WeissPraline]

I know; that's why I said 'MOST' people in Hollywood get married 'for the hell of it'- I was insenuating they get divorced sometime in the near future.

I also said 'I know most marriages end up badly now a days'. I know divorce rates are high.

[sgkoneko]

Originally Posted by devonin

So...sometimes you think you're in love but you aren't...so you shouldn't have premarital sex.

But...sometimes you get married and aren't either...but you -can- have sex then?

Your logic seems a little off to me.

I have to agree on this point.
Marriage to me is a pointless thing at this point in time.
The only usefulness of it is helping provide a slightlier stable home for children. If a child has two parents, it can be financially better for them and help them understand balance and relationships, just by having 2 parents. Marriage is a very strong bond, only because it's a pain in the ass to get a divorce. Thus I think marriage is good only for the purpose of having children.

Anyways. Some people stay together a long time, some don't.
I think waiting until you're married is really pointless, especially considering the amount of people getting married is going down really fast. No one is going to be waiting until they're married, because they WON'T be getting married, ever. Kids growing up have witnessed soo many problems between married people they know and even their parents that they just don't want to go through with it themselves.

So, any law or need for sex to be after one is married, would mean that everyone who wants to be independent has to stay a virgin forever, just because some people feel marriage makes sex safe. Pff.

[sgkoneko]

Originally Posted by WeissPraline

I know; that's why I said 'MOST' people in Hollywood get married 'for the hell of it'- I was insenuating they get divorced sometime in the near future.

I also said 'I know most marriages end up badly now a days'. I know divorce rates are high.

Celebrities get with people because their agents tell them to. It's all a publicity stunt, and the arguments in this thread should leave out that example all together.

[WeissPraline]

Touche, Koneko, Touche.


Marriage is all really in the eye of the beholder; some people value it, while others don't. Like everything else, it's all personal preferance.

[purebloodtexan]

Devonin, last time I read, divorce rates were dropping some; however, the fact that divorce rates are going down is due to the fact that marriage rates are going down.

Just a tiny correction.

[sgkoneko]

Originally Posted by WeissPraline

Touche, Koneko, Touche.


Marriage is all really in the eye of the beholder; some people value it, while others don't. Like everything else, it's all personal preferance.

Thus premarital sex is a personal preference. Thus that ends the argument.

It's what you want. That was my original argument in the first place. People should be able to choose what they want in life and when they want it.
If you want to wait until you're married, if you are getting married, that's your choice. If you don't, well that's also your choice.

[devonin]

Originally Posted by purebloodtexan

Devonin, last time I read, divorce rates were dropping some; however, the fact that divorce rates are going down is due to the fact that marriage rates are going down.

Just a tiny correction.

I think that a lot of the reason the divorce rate spiked and stayed high for a long time is that for a lot of married couples who were wed in decades previous to the 60s, divorce was just not something that happened. Everyone knows the stereotype of the christian couple, married at 16, who can't stand one another, but won't divorce because it's "a sin" and divorce as a concept was so stigmatized overall that many people who today would divorce in an instant, stayed together.

Then, after the major swing to the left in terms of civil and human rights, divorce suddenly became acceptable, and people were lining up to end the marriage that they didn't even really want to be in, in the first place. Divorce rates jump up to the point where it was accurate to say that 1/2 of all marriages would end in divorce.

Now, the rates are falling back into more reasonable levels, because divorce is such an accepted part of life now, that the children of divorced parents (and lots of divorces ended very badly for the couple and the children) are eager to avoid the turmoil and hardship, and are being more discerning in choosing who to marry. Casual relationships are more acceptable, and people are generally just waiting later to get married at all, so things are slowly returning to a more reasonable level.

[u84]

I'm not even going to bother reading what everyone else posted, as there is too much.

Now, with that said, my feel on this is that it is wrong to have pre-marital sex if it is with someone you just met, only dated for a few months, etc.

However, even if both people are a bit younger than 18, if they both love each other and have the plans to get married eventually or just plan on living together forever without being married in the legal sense, I think it is ok. If you are quite sure and your partner is, too, that you love the person you are with and believe you both are ready, regardless of what anybody else says, I think it is then ok.

[jewpinthethird]

Originally Posted by u84

I'm not even going to bother reading what everyone else posted, as there is too much.

Now, with that said, my feel on this is that it is wrong to have pre-marital sex if it is with someone you just met, only dated for a few months, etc.

However, even if both people are a bit younger than 18, if they both love each other and have the plans to get married eventually or just plan on living together forever without being married in the legal sense, I think it is ok. If you are quite sure and your partner is, too, that you love the person you are with and believe you both are ready, regardless of what anybody else says, I think it is then ok.

Don't bump threads you aren't even going to bother to read. You don't care about the opinion other others, we don't care about yours.

[doctorj52000]

Although it's the couples choice to have sex before they're married or not, God commands us in the Bible to not have premaritial sex.

I beleive sex is a plesure reserved for a man and woman who are very deeply in love AND married.

The choice is yours, but consider what God says.

[Relambrien]

Originally Posted by jewpinthethird

Don't bump threads you aren't even going to bother to read. You don't care about the opinion other others, we don't care about yours.

Exactly. It's alright to bump threads if you have a new spin or opinion on the topic, but not even reading the thread to see if it's already been discussed only results in an unnecessary bump.

[windsurfer-sp]

Well I just read every post in this bumped topic, or at least scanned my eyes over the words.

Why premarital sex is bad: Sex (I belive) is designed to only take place with yourself and one other person.

I believe there is a spiritual element (Christianity). An emotional element as in breaking up in a months time and having a "scarring". A physical element as in STD's and pregancies which is always a risk (yes its lowered by condoms). If there was only one sexual partner there wouldnt be any STD's.

Marriage is the line that is drawn to keep sex down to one partner. Yes there are divorces but let me suggest that marriages with divorce were ones with premarital envolved, and that Christian marriages can always last.

Personally I take this from a christian POV, but I think there are non-christian justifcations. They arent as deep withuout a spirtual belief and I guess thats why the general consensus is that premarital sex is ok within a strong relationship not bound to marriage.

[devonin]

Yes there are divorces but let me suggest that marriages with divorce were ones with premarital envolved, and that Christian marriages can always last.

You've committed about three seperate logical fallicies here.

First of all: You've presented a false dilemma, that the choice is between solely "A Christian marriage" and "A marriage where premarital sex took place." I know of many non-christians who chose to abstain from premarital sex, and many Christians who didn't.

Secondly: You've used the package deal fallacy, grouping together things that don't -necessarily- go together, but only go together some of the time, namely that marriages are all monogomous, that all instances of premarital sex end in "scarring" or that premarital sex is necessarily more likely to end in STDs or pregnancy than a monogamous one.

You're also trying to appeal to consequences, saying that premarital sex is -wrong- in itself simply because you find some of the potential consequences undesireable.

[MrRubix]

Mmm, go sex.

[devonin]

Hmm, go elsewhere than CT if you can't follow the rules of CT

[Wootsicle]

Originally Posted by MrRubix

Mmm, go sex.

Simple proof that you don't have it?


I'd say, "Yeah, go for premarital all the way, as long as you know it's right," but most people don't know when it's right. Honestly, though, marriage shouldn't be a measurement of love, but a milestone instead.

Marriage shouldn't decide when it's okay to have sex, but that doesn't mean people should have sex early in a relationship.

To add to that.. You shouldn't have sex until you can support a child, anyway. There is no safe sex.