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-   -   Premaritial Sex (http://www.flashflashrevolution.com/vbz/showthread.php?t=68355)

coolade123 05-17-2007 07:42 PM

Premaritial Sex
 
I saw Chardish make a huge post about this somewhere else but I want to see other peoples' opinions on this. What are the benefits of waiting until your married before having sexual intercourse, and are there any benefits of not waiting? I mean, you should always wait until your a certain age, but does getting married really make a difference?

Discuss.

Engler 05-17-2007 07:46 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
Hmmm...I'm a Catholic, so we're supposed to wait. I personally agree with this for the most part. I think it would be hard to stop yourself from having sex if you're deep in a relationship.

TheRapingDragon 05-17-2007 07:49 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
I don't believe it makes a difference. I believe the person I am with is my soul mate, the person I will be with forever. We are happy together and saw no reason to wait.

I also know that both my sisters are in happy relationships and never waited, and same with my parents. As such, I really see no reason in waiting so long as you are with the person you believe you will be with forever. Waiting until marraige is like putting a third party controller into your life who dictates when and how you can do something. You should be adult and be able to make your own decisions.

I say that because if you choose to have sex before marriage then there should be no reason against it.

alias123 05-17-2007 07:53 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
I think its okay to have sex before your married as long as you trust and love the person your with. My mom never married and in fact, shes not with my dad now. I should look him up....anyways, some people never want to get married.

pntballa18 05-17-2007 08:05 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
EDIT: I can't read =\

All_That_Chaz 05-17-2007 08:13 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
Sex is fun. Don't have kids unless you plan on staying together. Just be smart. There's really no reason to wait. Any reason to wait is a fabricated moral issue. Sex doesn't have to be about morals, it can just be fun.

oh and pntballa, alias said "look up," not "lock up," haha.

Wlfwnd91 05-17-2007 08:26 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
I agree with Chaz to be perfectly honest. I think there are 2 reasons to have sex: for fun, and for love. So many people take away the fun of sex by having it because they feel insecure, or unloved, or unmanly, or uncool, blah blah blah. If you bang cause it's fun then it'd be so much more enjoyable for everyone. I think sex is fine without marriage, because I personally don't believe in marriage. If you love someone then you love someone, no piece of paper or deity needs to complete that.

devonin 05-17-2007 08:26 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by All_That_Chaz (Post 1528016)
Sex is fun. Don't have kids unless you plan on staying together. Just be smart. There's really no reason to wait. Any reason to wait is a fabricated moral issue. Sex doesn't have to be about morals, it can just be fun.

oh and pntballa, alias said "look up," not "lock up," haha.

Indeed, the very fact that it -is- fun and pleasureable even -while- you take necessary precautions against conception argues for there being no compelling reason to make it a moral issue.

GuidoHunter 05-17-2007 09:03 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by TheRapingDragon (Post 1527941)
Waiting until marraige is like putting a third party controller into your life who dictates when and how you can do something. You should be adult and be able to make your own decisions.

Despite the fact that you are being adult about it and making your own decision when you choose to abstain from marriage?

chardish pretty much hit all the good points in his post, so for reference:

http://www.flashflashrevolution.com/...=56956&page=33

--Guido

http://andy.mikee835.com

inflames07 05-17-2007 09:17 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
There are benefits to having sex before, and after marriage. I don't consider this topic a big deal at all. If someone wants to have sex before they're married, it's their choice. However there may be consequences.

Quote:

Indeed, the very fact that it -is- fun and pleasureable even -while- you take necessary precautions against conception argues for there being no compelling reason to make it a moral issue.

All_That_Chaz 05-17-2007 09:34 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
Alright. I wasn't going to take this all that seriously, but Chardish's thoughts deserve more thought. Everyone should read his post before commenting on this subject, and thanks Guido for the link. I was kidding when I said that there's no reason not to wait, but that moral ones are fabricated, which is of course in the eye of the beholder.

I'm going to post in the other thread, as it's more developed and has some other things I want to touch on.

purebloodtexan 05-17-2007 10:06 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
As for me: I'm waiting until the proper age. Not only is it a fun challenge to wait until I'm legal, but it'll also be more rewarding when I finally get the goods.

TheRapingDragon and other members above me have made a good point about trusting the woman you do the deed with, and I believe that either the long relationship or marriage is the sign that I can trust the woman.

As for other people: I'm not one to judge people by how early their virginity is lost; if they want to start early, be my guest and have fun. However, it's usually the sex freak that I tend to frown upon. I mean, maybe you and your girlfriend are out one night, it's romantic, you're kinda frisky, go ahead and make sweet love to her. But I've heard stories about couples that argue almost daily, apologize, have make-up sex, repeat. That's what I consider to be the crossing point.

talisman 05-18-2007 12:00 AM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
If two (or more!) people are up for it, then why not?

Sex can be a lot of things to a lot of people. One can view it as a deeply rewarding expression of love with a sacred partner or one can view it as recreation. Both views (and all those in between) are equally valid. This is somewhat tangential to the topic at hand, but people should at least respect the sexual decisions that other people make and not judge them for it. Don't think someone's a prude because they are abstaining and don't think someone's a whore because they enjoy casual sex.

chunky_cheese 05-18-2007 12:03 AM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
I just had my first time last week, I never thought of it as bad until my girlfriend pointed it out.

TheRapingDragon 05-18-2007 04:56 AM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by GuidoHunter (Post 1528151)
Despite the fact that you are being adult about it and making your own decision when you choose to abstain from marriage?

Can you explain that part to me because I am either taking it wrong or you've just made a mistake. Where did I see abstain from marriage? I'm engaged. I believe I'm with the person I'm with forever, hence I believe that pre-marital sex should not be seen upon as negative so long as you have the belief and the love and all that there.

Grandiagod 05-18-2007 05:54 AM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
Have you noticed that the people not getting any are the people who make such a big deal about it and take it so seriously?

Poor Chardish

PurifiedWater 05-18-2007 07:12 AM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
its all about what you believe
same with abortion but thats another topic

GuidoHunter 05-18-2007 01:03 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by TheRapingDragon (Post 1528744)
Can you explain that part to me because I am either taking it wrong or you've just made a mistake. Where did I see abstain from marriage? I'm engaged. I believe I'm with the person I'm with forever, hence I believe that pre-marital sex should not be seen upon as negative so long as you have the belief and the love and all that there.

Yeah, I totally just misused a preposition. I meant "when you choose to abstain from sex, until marriage.

As for my point, you were making it sound like abstinence was some sort of heavy burden that's bringing you down, when it's not like that at all.

--Guido

http://andy.mikee385.com

devonin 05-18-2007 01:09 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by GuidoHunter (Post 1529140)
As for my point, you were making it sound like abstinence was some sort of heavy burden that's bringing you down, when it's not like that at all.

Maybe it isn't for you and is for them.

GuidoHunter 05-18-2007 01:26 PM

Re: Premaritial Sex
 
Who unwittingly engages in abstinence? It's a choice to develop a greater appreciation for sex with your spouse.

--Guido

http://andy.mikee385.com


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