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Sickness..
Posted on: February 7, 2012, at 01:48:24am

Over the past few years, I have been experiencing depression, delay in motor skill and twitches/involuntary muscle movements. I didn't think it was much, so a couple years back I went to my family doctor for a check-up. Dr. Takar said it was nothing and told me not to worry, they said it was a "normal teenage thing" and "probably stress related".

I went again last year because the severity didn't increase, but it didn't decrease either. She told me the same thing; it was stress related and may have something to do with my job and school; stress.

In the past few months though, I was experiencing trouble sleeping and much deeper depression (suicidal thoughts); I decided it was time to go to a different doctor to get a difference of opinion. Well, he reluctantly explained there was definitely something wrong, and wanted to run some blood tests. It's been 3 weeks, and I had went in today to get my results. He explained what I had. Early onset symptoms of huntingtons chorea, which immediately left me devestated, on the verge of tears.

I was reluctant on whether or not to make this post, as I do not like sympathy nor expect it. I don't even want to believe what he told me; he gave me a bunch of medical bullshit I didn't care about. I doubt I'll tell my family about this. I just want to tell you all that if you even THINK you're a little sick, go see your doctor immediately. Even nothing can be something..

Despite this, I will continue to play FFR and continue to go to school. I won't be able to fulfill my career as a cardiologist, but at least I can make the journey for as long as I can. Fuck.

1: popsicle_3000
Posted at 2:40am on February 7th, 2012

dude I dont know what to say! wow...
i'll be praying for you hard!!
2: chocobothief12
Posted at 1:20pm on February 7th, 2012

:<
3: bmah
Posted at 1:47pm on February 7th, 2012

I guess the question is...would it have been better if you didn't know the issues you've been having, or do you prefer knowing such a fate? I would be devastated if I found out in advance that my life was going to be cut short. But I'd also do as much as I can, knowing that life is short. Make the most out of life.
4: YOSHl
Posted at 11:18am on February 8th, 2012

I'm trying to wrap my head around this...oh my god.
personally...I'd tell my family. From experience, I do know that parents will care the most about you and...Yeah, they might be a burden to you, with their sadness and shock, or whatever response they would have, but...letting the people who have seen you grow up know that you're...you know :/
It's just that much better to have that much more support and love in your life.
5: Sky Kitten
Posted at 12:35pm on February 8th, 2012

Aw man, I'm so sorry you're going through that. :( Please don't keep this away from your family. Sure they may take it as something life threatening and it may cut your life short, but as YOSHl said, it's much better to have that much more support and love in your life.
We're here for you too. Depression and suicidal thoughts are not easy to cope with, but if you ever need to talk to someone, I'm sure most of us are willing to listen.
6: YOSHl
Posted at 10:17pm on February 8th, 2012

of course!
my reasoning though was that...sooner or later they'll find out...it'll be much better sooner i think :X
7: 00Razor00
Posted at 2:05am on February 9th, 2012

Oh damn, that kinda blows. :/ I hope everything's okay with you. You should definitely try to be open with your parents about this and see what happens. You have people to talk to on here, so don't feel embarrassed to come to us about something! :)
8: j-rodd123
Posted at 8:06am on February 9th, 2012

I hope that it's not that! Have you tried consulting a geneticist to get tested for the gene? Hopefully everything's okay, and I truly think there will be great treatment options for this soon with all the breakthroughs in genetic research. All the best fellow Kitchener brotha :P
9: yo man im awesome
Posted at 9:07pm on February 9th, 2012

My god man.. I'm really sorry. I've never done this before, but I'm praying for you man, you'll pull through it.
10: XPYRYMYNT
Posted at 3:53pm on February 10th, 2012

Medical breakthroughs are happening every day, especially for genetic diseases like Huntington's. It's also been proven that the more you believe you can outlive the disease, the longer you'll actually live! What I'm trying to say is, don't lose hope! Stay strong and resilient. Every day is a chance to spread some positivity to those around you, and I know that's what you're all about. Tell your family about it, too. They'll surely be scared inside but they'll make their best effort to help as much as possible. Be stronger than the disease, don't let it consume you!
11: Anaru
Posted at 4:06am on February 13th, 2012

Live life to the fullest, brother.
We are a speck of dust in the universe..
And making what we do count, is what really matters.
Now go out there and fly high! The possibilities are still endless, because we live for today.
12: reuben_tate
Posted at 8:10am on March 3rd, 2012

Just read through all that, I really hope things are going ok for you, considering you've been gone for awhile. Just remember that asking for help, even if it's emotional support, is not a sign of weakness. The stubborn thought of "I can deal with this all by myself" is just going to cause more anxiety and stress; it's always best to reach out when you're stuck in a hole, rather than digging yourself deeper into it. With that said, I'd tell your family, if anything, they deserve to know. It's nice that you are making a start though and telling us here on FFR, we tend to be a very tight-knit community, and there is always someone to talk to over here (myself included (^)>) Anyways, keep your head up high and make the most out of what's given to you. :3
13: wargasm1
Posted at 7:50am on February 9th, 2013

jesus i dont know u and this makes me really sad to read. I wish u well.