I've been rewriting nursery rhymes

[Wayward Vagabond]

xpost from my temp thread location that is tgb

Mary had a little lamb

Mary had a new dodge ram
Twas blue with rims of gold

Her parents were against the sale
she dismissed what she was told.

She showed it off to everyone
And some did think to steal

one day under the lazy sun
The truck did disappear

Mary now sure does regret
The purchase she had made

"We told you so" her parents said
With which no attention Mary paid

Jack and jill

Jack and jill went up a hill
to get better reception.
Jack gave up, jill tried her luck
with no success to mention.

Upset they got, and slowly walked
Back their rented cabin
They cried to mom, to dad they sobbed
Without their facebook no location could they tag in.

Hickory dickory dock

Hickory dickory dock
Our phones are now our clocks
Digital has won
Analog's died out
Hickory dickory dock

Ring around the rosies rewrite

Hashtag, follow, tag me
Social media, it drives thee
Share this
Share this
Let the world know now

All around the mulberry bush/tree

All around the couch smoking kush
They started seeing limbs grow
They freaked and cried
Wondering what they're on
Weed, lsd, and a bit of some blow

Little miss muffet

Little Miss Muffet
Sat on the carpet,
Playing with Barbie and Ken;
Along came a feminist,
Who told her to Hell with this
And turned her into a butch lesbian.

I rewrote it again

Little Miss Muffet
Sat on a trumpet,
Blowing the horn with her queefs;
She played music nonstop,
As everyone's jaws dropped
Looking on in disbelief