Catalyst of Dystrophy - Chapter 1

x velo x · 01-15-2007, 07:46 PM

Seldom, is it ever, in western culture that we gain the opperatunity to step outside ourselves. To trully examine the context in which we exist. As a whole , we seem to have this image of humanity as a beautiful flower forged out of a disgusting landscape of dirt and grime. And we hopelessly cling to some beleif that we rised above the animal intentions of our ancestors and that our mere existance is something amazing. Be it with the view of darwinism or a different , more mystical religious vein of thought. We seem to think, for the most part, that we're what nature did right.

We fail to examine the nature of our existance. Like all the others we're mutants. ****ed up leftovers from the post dinosaur era that clinged and scraped our way to live and along the line somewhere our brains morphed to speak. To think in words. All animals communicate but we rised above that , we created a new dimention to thought. An amazing advancement for all I suppose. With the exception that we over complicated things. We're not knoble beasts , we just are harder to understand. And by what right does that make us suppirior. A good chef knows that the best dishes are those that are genuine in their simplicity. And so true is that in nature. Take as an example, plants. They can exist on nothing more then basic chemical compounds found on earth. They further their race without need for complex emotions , or selectivity. Also take for example single celled organisms. They exist in the same way. And like the ipod video to the original , we are an un-needed improvement on something that could have existed perfectly fine.

This begs the question then, why did we come about if they were so perfect. As far as I'm concerned it was merely the mechanical will of the universe enacting its chaos theory onto us. We build and we build upon things until there is nothing left. Its the endless cycle of novelty. McKenna described that on December 12 2012 the universe's novelty level will reach it's climax and all will be destroyed in a hail of existance.

So as we meditate upon this. What answer does this provoke you to beleive. Are we really the highest evolved beings the world to come up with. Were we meant to be the destroyers of our world. Or really , is it the world as we know it is a fable, a mystery and the expounding answers we receive are destroying it. We were doomed from the start. We WERE the doom from the start.

Our rancid bodies lay here compounding novelty some bits of energy woven in flesh coloured synthetic silk. So bundle up, have a smoke, and await the apocolypse my friends because the only comfort we can trully receive is the warm blanket of our impending destruction.

**TheRapingDragon** · 01-15-2007, 07:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by x velo x

Seldom, is it ever, in western culture that we gain the opperatunity to step outside ourselves. To trully...

I stopped here, if you can't even proof-read your work so that there are no spelling errors then I fear for the actual content of your story.

Tokzic · 01-15-2007, 08:15 PM

Your title screams, "I used a thesaurus."

You misspell upwards of two words per sentence.

Your grammar is horribly broken and choppy, with countless fragments.

The whole thing really tries to sound philosophical but fails to in that it's 90% bull**** and irrelevant tangents.

Yep.

**TheRapingDragon** · 01-15-2007, 08:35 PM

Guess I was right then.

chequered · 01-16-2007, 08:36 PM

Ouch. Harsh critique. But I will agree - Your writing lacks proofreading and such.

the_unda_doggz · 01-18-2007, 03:00 AM

Lol, I'd be embarassed. XD

mead1 · 01-18-2007, 08:27 AM

You mentioned McKenna. Instant Fail.

mead1 · 01-18-2007, 08:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tokzic

Your WHOLE ESSAY screams, "I used a thesaurus."

fixed

01-15-2007, 07:46 PM	#1
x velo x FFR Player Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Canada, eh? Age: 31 Posts: 182	Catalyst of Dystrophy - Chapter 1 Seldom, is it ever, in western culture that we gain the opperatunity to step outside ourselves. To trully examine the context in which we exist. As a whole , we seem to have this image of humanity as a beautiful flower forged out of a disgusting landscape of dirt and grime. And we hopelessly cling to some beleif that we rised above the animal intentions of our ancestors and that our mere existance is something amazing. Be it with the view of darwinism or a different , more mystical religious vein of thought. We seem to think, for the most part, that we're what nature did right. We fail to examine the nature of our existance. Like all the others we're mutants. ****ed up leftovers from the post dinosaur era that clinged and scraped our way to live and along the line somewhere our brains morphed to speak. To think in words. All animals communicate but we rised above that , we created a new dimention to thought. An amazing advancement for all I suppose. With the exception that we over complicated things. We're not knoble beasts , we just are harder to understand. And by what right does that make us suppirior. A good chef knows that the best dishes are those that are genuine in their simplicity. And so true is that in nature. Take as an example, plants. They can exist on nothing more then basic chemical compounds found on earth. They further their race without need for complex emotions , or selectivity. Also take for example single celled organisms. They exist in the same way. And like the ipod video to the original , we are an un-needed improvement on something that could have existed perfectly fine. This begs the question then, why did we come about if they were so perfect. As far as I'm concerned it was merely the mechanical will of the universe enacting its chaos theory onto us. We build and we build upon things until there is nothing left. Its the endless cycle of novelty. McKenna described that on December 12 2012 the universe's novelty level will reach it's climax and all will be destroyed in a hail of existance. So as we meditate upon this. What answer does this provoke you to beleive. Are we really the highest evolved beings the world to come up with. Were we meant to be the destroyers of our world. Or really , is it the world as we know it is a fable, a mystery and the expounding answers we receive are destroying it. We were doomed from the start. We WERE the doom from the start. Our rancid bodies lay here compounding novelty some bits of energy woven in flesh coloured synthetic silk. So bundle up, have a smoke, and await the apocolypse my friends because the only comfort we can trully receive is the warm blanket of our impending destruction. __________________ x VELO x Former Username: alexepstein Member for: 0.81 years... not very long

01-15-2007, 08:15 PM	#3
Tokzic FFR Player Join Date: May 2005 Location: TGB Age: 34 Posts: 6,878	Re: Catalyst of Dystrophy - Chapter 1 Your title screams, "I used a thesaurus." You misspell upwards of two words per sentence. Your grammar is horribly broken and choppy, with countless fragments. The whole thing really tries to sound philosophical but fails to in that it's 90% bull** and irrelevant tangents. Yep. __________________ ~very popular guitar streamer~** Last edited by Tokzic: Today at 11:59 PM. Reason: wait what Last edited by Tokzic; 01-15-2007 at 08:22 PM..

01-15-2007, 08:35 PM	#4
TheRapingDragon A car crash mind Join Date: Aug 2005 Age: 36 Posts: 9,788	Re: Catalyst of Dystrophy - Chapter 1 Guess I was right then.

01-16-2007, 08:36 PM	#5
chequered FFR Player Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: The Shire Posts: 2	Re: Catalyst of Dystrophy - Chapter 1 Ouch. Harsh critique. But I will agree - Your writing lacks proofreading and such.

01-18-2007, 03:00 AM	#6
the_unda_doggz Banned Join Date: Sep 2005 Location: Lake Mary, Florida Age: 33 Posts: 643	Re: Catalyst of Dystrophy - Chapter 1 Lol, I'd be embarassed. XD

01-18-2007, 08:27 AM	#7
mead1 Cerebellumberjack Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: On a boat Age: 33 Posts: 3,960	Re: Catalyst of Dystrophy - Chapter 1 You mentioned McKenna. Instant Fail.

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