IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

Love! Life is short, you must do things! Love!

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

Agreed that if you're going to do something, that you should while you can...
...but is it worth it?

I've never slept in a dog's house in my life, and while I'm not psychic, I don't think I ever will. Why? I don't see the benefit, and don't view it really as worth it.

Love is something a little less one-sided though. There are benefits, and there are negatives. In searching for someone, there is a large chance for a small negative (Being rejected, just feeling down from being lonely and unable to find anyone, etc), and the is a small chance for a large positive (Finding someone you're happy with).

Mathematically:
Positive = 0.1*1000 (10% chance for something positive to happen, and a large (1000) effect when it does)
Negative = -0.9*100 (90% chance for something negative to happen, but small (100) effect when it does)

So the average net would be you'll have to endure 90 sadness, but you'll get 100 happiness in the process, so it would be worth it in the end.

A less abstract way to view this is in terms of gamling: Large chance you'll lose, but a small chance you'll win big. However, casinos would never make a profit if they didn't lean things in their favour, so they rig things to give you a slightly higher chance of losing. This is why gambling is a poor method for making money for the average person.

Sadly, however, love doesn't have set win/lose ratios, or measurable effects.

Taking everything into account, is it worth even trying, or would it be a liability, and we would get more out of this life by removing relationships from it?

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

I think for essentially all humans it is worth it to spend time searching for love. The people I know who have made it into their 30's or later without getting into any serious relationships seem to be extremely unhappy.

I also don't think you can even get close to calculating a reasonable expected value for the future worth of such an endeavor since there are so many variables at work; can you really estimate how happy a particular relationship would make you if you haven't experienced it?

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

It's a personal belief. I think it is worth it to look for love. Something about the chase is always fun, and it opens your mind to new ideas. However there are those who would argue that being alone is just as rewarding. I don't know how those people feel so I can not comment or give an example.

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

It's better to love and loose instead of never loving at all. Experience makes it better. Also, shouldn't this go in Critical Thinking?

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

Dude, better to love. the end

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

It was moved -from- critical thinking for not being critical or thinky enough.

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

Consider me a primary source, if you will.

I dated a girl I was head over heels in love with for seven months from the summer of 02 to the spring of 03. This was my senior year of high school. When we broke up, I was heartbroken. I attempted suicide twice over her (not looking for sympathy, just stating facts). I rebounded with other girls but was so numb I couldn't even become sexually aroused. I spent most of college dwelling on her and wondering if I'd ever feel what I felt for her again. I was in therapy for a while at college due to her. I got over her somewhat abruptly in the summer of 06 when we worked at the same summer camp and she showed how big of an idiot she is. ...it's a long story you can pm/aim me if you care to hear it.

Anyway, the reason I told you that is that because even after all that. After going through college without even caring about relationships. After ruining my late teens - early twenties on her, still, it was worth it. Just knowing that I was that happy and knowing what I know now about love makes it worth it. What are humans if not vessels for experience? Why read and wonder about love and heartache when you could experience them for yourself?

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

semi-creepy depending on the situation

they want to hear of other people's love troubles

an unconscious state of mind

this was funny

self-gratification

accounting

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

Why do you want to know other people's opinions instead of trying to find out for yourself? It's pointless for anyone in this forum to tell you how much love is worth the risk because those feelings/connections aren't exactly something that is to be described, only experienced. I'm not saying that it's impossible to explain, it's just totally different experiencing it.

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

First one. Simple answer.

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

all i have to say is that i love your way with words and way of thinking goldenwind!

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

A broken heart is a beautiful thing.

Re: IS it better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all?

Life is the longest thing you will ever do... I don't know how that qualifies as "Short".

^_^