What is Love? (Types of Intimacy)
Posted on: July 21, 2008, at 01:35:34am

I was deep in thought earlier about types intimacy and what the heck this thing called "love" was and I figured I should write my ideas down and share them with the world! No, but seriously, I think you'll find this to be a fairly interesting read. All my original writing, just for the doubters.

1. RELATIONSHIP--The most obvious type of intimacy, of course, is the relationship kind. That's the kind you'll probably see most people on this site talking about because it refers to boyfriends and girlfriends, and also because most people on this site are PERVS XD

2.FAMILY--I love my mom and dad, and sisters, and brothers, and extended family etc. I have an intimate relationship with them that isn't incest. That, of course, is a family intimacy. I suppose loving a spouse can also kindof be considered family intimacy as well, since, when you married him/her, they became part of your immediate family.

3.FRIENDSHIP--Friendship makes the world go round!! By the way, I'm kidding, I really don't plan on being in a Disney movie any time soon. But, seriously, this is the type of love you share with a best friend. You do everything together etc etc and sometimes even finish each others' sentences. Plain and simple, friendship intimacy.

4.OBJECT--Unfortunately, I couldn't come up with any better title than that. This is the type of intimacy where you say "Oh, I love pizza or this shirt or whatever because it tastes good or looks amazing" and you just say it because you find it enjoyable. There you have it, object intimacy.

5.RELIGIOUS--This is the type of intimacy where you love whatever you worship. I'm Christian, therefore I have an intimacy with God. Even Atheists have a religious intimacy, because they worship themselves, due to of their lack of diety. That said, it brings me to my next one.

6.SELF--This is where you get this huge ego boost and say "I love myself." Nowadays, it's hard to find that kind of intimacy in people because others have put them down so much that the man in the mirror looks horrible. This is the part where I get cheesy and urge whoever is reading this to be nice to the next person you see. Compliment people every once in a while, see what a difference it makes.

7.STRANGER--This is the intimacy you have with people who have no relation to you. It's how you treat people you've never met before. How you handle this type of intimacy depends on your personality. Being rude to someone you've never met before won't help you in the long run. so, once again, people, I urge you. Be nice.

8.LUST--This particular intimacy is very touchy to some people. I struggle to even call it an intimacy at all, honestly. This is, as some of you may have guessed already, sexual in nature. A good example would be if a hot guy/girl walks by on the street and you literally undress them with your mind or follow them with your eyes thinking "oh, if I were to hold her etc etc." As discussed briefly in the relationship paragraph, this is what most people on this site deal with. They search profiles, find a girl with nice pictures, compliment them, become friends, and the list goes on. On that note, the next time you think you like someone, especially online, ask yourself the question "Why?" And if the response is very narrow...I would rethink that relationship.

Now, after discussing all those intimacies, what could love be? I think it's a combination or an advancement of a few of them put together, which brings me to my final segment.

LOVE--To seriously love someone, you can't just start out by immediately saying "Oh, she's/he's hot, I need her to be my girlfriend/boyfriend." That would be lust, in case you didn't read my intimacy segment on it. Lust is the main reason for short term relationships and divorces. Beauty fades over time, people, so make sure you notice the inner beauty before you make that commitment. Now, going back to love,it's, once again, a combination or advancement of a bunch of intimacies.

Love should usually start out with the stranger intimacy. You're very nice and polite and courteous to that particular person and you start a conversation. This slowly turns into the friendship intimacy. You start hanging out with that person a lot and you share a few jokes, pretty soon you know eachother very well. Here comes the feelings. This is where the self intimacy comes in. You examine yourself and say "Am I really good enough for this person?" A lot of the time, the self intimacy determines whether you want to make the commitment to be more than friends. As stated earlier, throughout this process, lust is always there. It's a tricky thing, that lust, and you'll do well to avoid it whenever possible. Now that you're done examining yourself, suppose you decide to make that commitment to ask the other person out and they say yes. At this point, you're still at a friend intimacy believe it or not, but you're testing out its boundaries. Then you go on a few dates and decide you both are very fond of eachother, more so than friends. Then, it's finally at the relationship stage. Now, at this point, were going to zoom a few years into the future after you've been dating for a long while. Soon enough, someone proposes for marriage. Both of you get married and move in together, but the first few months(or even years) are still relationship testing. You're still finding out how you both can coexist day after day. Suddenly, you figure out that he/she is definitely the one for you, and you decide to settle down and have a family. Of course, if you're reading this, you probably know how that's done. If not, you're too young to be dating, anyways. Yes, it is lust, but its lust for your husband/wife. That's the only pure lust there is, and the only time it's actually right...when you're "bedding down" with your spouse. Anyways, you get that finished, have a few kids,and the final stage begins. You relationship has finally sprouted fully and turned into a family intimacy. Congratulations, if you made it this far, and figured out they're actually the one for you, you can grow old with your spouse in peace. That's true love. When you love someone enough to grow old with them and still love them even in the worst of times.

Thank you for reading this, people. Please comment. I'll answer any questions relating to this if asked.

1. 1: Tyranee
   Posted at 1:36am on July 21st, 2008

   Yes, I did write this, all you skeptics. Please comment if you read it :P
2. 2: THATGiRLOVES
   Posted at 1:58am on July 21st, 2008

   LOVE is just.
   it is indescribable yet inevitable.
   it causes pain yet also joy.
   why is this ?
   it is JUST.
   <3 ♥ ‹3 [heart]
3. 3: Tyranee
   Posted at 2:03am on July 21st, 2008

   Actually, it's not indescribable, considering I just described it. But you're right about the rest XD
4. 4: THATGiRLOVES
   Posted at 2:22am on July 21st, 2008

   LOL, well, its just pretty hard to describe though, considering it contains many emotions.
5. 5: Tyranee
   Posted at 2:23am on July 21st, 2008

   If you read, the segment, would you say I described it pretty well though?
6. 6: Anime_Angel123
   Posted at 7:10am on July 21st, 2008

   You defiantely described every detail exactly....wow....im speechless after reading that. It seems that love and lust go hand in hand but wow that was a very good description. What made you come up with that?
7. 7: Anime_Angel123
   Posted at 12:49am on July 23rd, 2008

   i guess you making this essay because of me was a waste right? hehe =/ =]
8. 8: bobeck
   Posted at 2:25am on July 31st, 2008

   one of these days i'll get around to reading this. :) hahah