Everyday I wonder why I'm still here when there is nothing left. I use to once be a happy, loving soul, but it was damaged by 'them' and seems like it never can be fixed again. I've been hurt, abused, and damned far too much for me to handle it all anymore! No one understands me because theyre too scared to get to know me! I want to finally give up; just escape and rid of all my pain. I want people to understand, I want comfort... I tend to bottle up all of your emotions and problems, hoping that theyll all go away But I long to reach out and tell that one special person all of my feelings and troubles! But I never seem to have that person to talk to, or they just dont seem to want to hear me! I like expressing yourself in many ways; whether it be through my emotions, words, art, or even physically. I also enjoy nice quiet sceneries that just dazzle my mind with awe. I want a normal and happy life. I always feel this sense of loneliness clouding over my head, though surrounded by several people. None of them know me; I feel as though no one can relate to me. I want understanding, I want that friend, and I want that perfect life! My sanctuary would probably be any place where I can be alone and hide out, such as my bedroom... I may be tough at times and try to prevent myself from crying on the outside.... But my heart is always crying on the inside...

+hanging out with you +[occasionally] watch some tv +watching movies and reading books so good and thought provoking that you walk away a different person afterwards +cold weather +taking random pictures +STARBUCKS +going out +dancing the night away +thinking about the meaning of life +randomness +writing +bruster's key lime pie ice cream +late night phone calls +staying up till 6 in the morning having a thoughtful conversation +2 double cheeseburgers without onions and a medium diet coke from McDonalds +late night meals +making t-shirts +going to shows +nature +going to the park +going out and finding something to do...with no money +cuddling [preferably with a human...but a stuffed animal will do] +cigarettes +Rockstar Lattes +taco bell +vintage clothes +goodwill +secret love +stealing glances at your crush from across the room +black and white pictures +wearing preppy clothes...and not looking preppy +being the center of attention +writing major essays the night before they are due +meeting people...and immediately befriending them +being loved completely +INTERNET friends -vs- REAL friends +being overwhelmed by amazing music

-Southern Mischief -Nine Inch Nails -LoveHateHero -Bright Eyes -Mindless Self Indulgence -the White Stripes -Oasis -A Thorn for Every Heart -FlyLeaf -Anti-Flag -Fall Out Boy -OK GO -The Dresden Dolls -My Chemical Romance -HelloGoodbye -Billy Idol -Bush -Matchbox 20 -Still Remains -Atreyu -Hit the Lights -Five Times Agust -MxPx -Nofx -A Bullet for My Valentine -HopesFall -Cold War Kids -Incubus -Change of Pace -Avenged Sevenfold -Taking Back Sunday -Coldplay -Goldfinger -the Goo Goo Dolls -Nirvana -the Used -Cold -Staind -AC/DC -Gang of Four -Smile Empty Soul -Gym Class Heros -HIM -the Distillers -Mae -the Blood Brothers -Norma Jean -the All-American Rejects -the Killers -No Doubt -Muse -Orgy -the Click Five -Senses Fail -Black Flag -Hawthorne Heights -the Clash -the Ramones -Kanye West -Anberlin -Say Anything -the Panic Division -Four letter lie -Bedlight for Blueyes

+Donnie Darko +Brokeback Mountain +Crash +Closer +Rent +Kill Bill +Kill Bill 2 +American History X +Sin City +Finding Neverland +Prince of Egypt +A Home at the End of the World +Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind +Gummo +the Virgin Suicides +Hedwig and the Angry Inch +the Rocky Horror Picture Show +the Craft +Vanilla Sky +Hocus Pocus +Party Monster +the Talented Mr. Ripley +Harry Potter +Requiem for a Dream +Tank Girl +Bruce Almighty +Edward Scissor Hands +Labyrinth +I < Huckabees +Slacker +Storytellers +Team America +Trainspotting +Fight Club +Saw +Saw II +Dazed and Confused +Mean Girls +Garden State +Lord of the Rings +How to Loose a Guy in 10 Days +Memoirs of a Geisha +Dark City +Scarface +Zoolander +the Crow +Monty Python's Holy Grail +Reefer Madness +Dead Poet's Society +the Ring +the Ring 2