Problem in your life? I'll solve it in a sentence.

[Aldentron]

Originally Posted by EnR

How can I get my girlfriend back, I'm depressed and if I get her back all those others problems will go away because I'll be happy again.

Is this your girlfriend?

http://tinyurl.com/244us72

Because she looks embarrassed about your hair.

[WolfXhunter]

Are you Jesus?

[Rubin0]

Originally Posted by EnR

I have a hard time going to sleep early.
I want to go back to work, well I NEED to, but I hate everyone there but need the money really bad and it has good hours, but this goes with my first problem, I'll have to start waking up at 7am, I usually go to bed at 3-4am, I can't go to bed before midnight.
How can I make myself lose weight, I've gained over 40 pounds over two years and hate it, yet I can't make myself lose the weight, and if I start working I'll never have time to go to the gym.
My dogs are overweight and I don't think taking them for a walk will make them lose it very fast, what else can I do?
How can I get my girlfriend back, I'm depressed and if I get her back all those others problems will go away because I'll be happy again.

You can answer each question with a sentence.

Hi EnR. I'm only going to reference your weight gain and it's going to be much longer than once sentence. As you get older it's going to get harder to lose weight even if you are eating exactly what you were eating two years ago. Sometimes making huge life changes is too intimidating for people and it only causes them to fall deeper and deeper into that weight gain hole. I would suggest cutting ONE thing from your diet. If you drink soda then replace it with ice cold water with a squeezed lemon. For some reason when there is lemon in it it will make you coming back for more, you will be peeing a hell of a lot and you might even eat a little less. But for guys, they drop weight fast once they take out some sugar from their diet. My guess is you could probably lose 10 pounds in less than a month of if you cut out all carbonated and sugary drinks. Once you start seeing a difference it's amazing how fast you will feel motivated to go to the gym. And once you start losing weight and feeling more confident you will start looking at other girls. Once you start looking at other girls you will forget about that girl that dumped you, you will realize you were too good for her, and you might even find someone else who is a million times better. /End of depression.

Also taking your dogs on walks will help both you and the dogs. They might be a little depressed too. Who knows.

[EnR]

I drink pop anytime I can, I guess I can attempt to stop, but I'm sorta addicted.

[scientific]

just listen to excision/datsik - swagga on repeat for a few days and youll be fine

[welsh_girl]

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?

[poochieCREAM]

I feel a sense of guilt for my happiness because I know billions of other people aren't as fortunate as myself.
I'm also a stress addict apparently. I took this career test in Work Place Preparation and it says I strive in stress, which is true. I get adrenaline when I'm put under pressure, but I'm kind of sick of it. I take on more than I can handle, but I always manage to please others, even if it's at my own expense. Because of this hard working streak, I've been taken advantage of (work wise lol) and that bothers me as well, but I always try to ignore that thought because I can't say no when someone needs help.
Also, I treat other's problems as my own, which contributes to that stress. If a friend is sad, I'm sad. If I find out a friend is pregnant, which has happened, I try and consult them and guide them every step of the way and am always there for them, again at my own expense. I get caught up in other people's problems, trying to assist, so much so that I don't even know who I am.

Also, I frequently have dreams of the loss of people I love.

[Litodude]

Originally Posted by garquillex

I have a pathological desire to solve political and other peoples' problems while avoiding my own.

Congratulations, you're a typical human being that lives in hypocrisy.

Originally Posted by EnR

I have a hard time going to sleep early.
I want to go back to work, well I NEED to, but I hate everyone there but need the money really bad and it has good hours, but this goes with my first problem, I'll have to start waking up at 7am, I usually go to bed at 3-4am, I can't go to bed before midnight.
How can I make myself lose weight, I've gained over 40 pounds over two years and hate it, yet I can't make myself lose the weight, and if I start working I'll never have time to go to the gym.
My dogs are overweight and I don't think taking them for a walk will make them lose it very fast, what else can I do?
How can I get my girlfriend back, I'm depressed and if I get her back all those others problems will go away because I'll be happy again.

You can answer each question with a sentence.

Things always work out for those who work out.

Originally Posted by welsh_girl

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?

We use locks now, but there was a big problem in some parts of the country where gravediggers would sell body parts to docs back in the day.

Originally Posted by poochieCREAM

I feel a sense of guilt for my happiness because I know billions of other people aren't as fortunate as myself.
I'm also a stress addict apparently. I took this career test in Work Place Preparation and it says I strive in stress, which is true. I get adrenaline when I'm put under pressure, but I'm kind of sick of it. I take on more than I can handle, but I always manage to please others, even if it's at my own expense. Because of this hard working streak, I've been taken advantage of (work wise lol) and that bothers me as well, but I always try to ignore that thought because I can't say no when someone needs help.
Also, I treat other's problems as my own, which contributes to that stress. If a friend is sad, I'm sad. If I find out a friend is pregnant, which has happened, I try and consult them and guide them every step of the way and am always there for them, again at my own expense. I get caught up in other people's problems, trying to assist, so much so that I don't even know who I am.

Also, I frequently have dreams of the loss of people I love.

Take a vacation to a quiet monastery, church, hot spring, and talk to someone you trust, like a counselor or psychiatrist, to let out your frustrations.

Originally Posted by Aldentron

What's a good, generic (so that you can just put it on every one) lie that you can use to impress business owners to sum up why you want to work at a business if you don't really want to work there? I'm on a job hunt and that is the hardest line to fill in every time, even if I kinda do want to work there.

"I'm responsible, willing to work **** hours, have my own vehicle, and I don't want to be a useless father when my child comes."

Originally Posted by Linkisdoomed

I can't install Gentoo on my system. What kernel options do I need activated if I'm building my own kernel?

-Core i7 920
-6GB DDR3 Hyperthreading
-EVGA E757 motherboard
-2x GTS 250 graphics cards

http://www.gentoo.org/doc/en/handboo...?part=1&chap=7

[Litodude]

nump

[leonid]

How should I not **** up my sleep schedule

[Matrixdude]

So I'm connected to the internet wirelessly AND through an Ethernet cable with "excellent connectivity" in both. Somehow my laptop doesn't want to connect to any webpages through Internet explorer. I'm typing this on my iPod using the same wireless connection as my laptop so it's not the connection's fault.

I also tried turning off my firewall nothing worked and I tried using Internet explorer with no add ons and that didn't work either.

What could be going wrong? Because I just used this laptop yesterday just fine and now no webpages will work correctly!

[Litodude]

Originally Posted by Matrixdude

So I'm connected to the internet wirelessly AND through an Ethernet cable with "excellent connectivity" in both. Somehow my laptop doesn't want to connect to any webpages through Internet explorer. I'm typing this on my iPod using the same wireless connection as my laptop so it's not the connection's fault.

I also tried turning off my firewall nothing worked and I tried using Internet explorer with no add ons and that didn't work either.

What could be going wrong? Because I just used this laptop yesterday just fine and now no webpages will work correctly!

It could be a multitude of problems - do you have an HP?

Originally Posted by leonid

How should I not **** up my sleep schedule

Sleep when you're supposed to, dolt.

[Matrixdude]

Originally Posted by Litodude

It could be a multitude of problems - do you have an HP?

I do, a 4400. Anyway, I was able to transfer the installer for Firefox onto this computer to see if FF would work. Initially FF wouldn't connect either, it gave me a could not connect through proxy or something along those lines. So I went in the settings and set it to no proxy. No clue why it was like that...

Anyway I still don't know what to do for IE it still doesn't work and I can't find any proxy settings in it.

[Litodude]

Originally Posted by Matrixdude

I do, a 4400. Anyway, I was able to transfer the installer for Firefox onto this computer to see if FF would work. Initially FF wouldn't connect either, it gave me a could not connect through proxy or something along those lines. So I went in the settings and set it to no proxy. No clue why it was like that...

Anyway I still don't know what to do for IE it still doesn't work and I can't find any proxy settings in it.

HP has a bad habit of selling laptop that are equipped with NICs that become defective right after your warranty expires, get a new computer.

[-zeroSKILL-]

How do I make Jessica Alba fall in love with me?

[-zeroSKILL-]

Also, I'm broke, and don't want to work for money, nor do I want to attain it illegally. Halp.

[Matrixdude]

Originally Posted by Litodude

HP has a bad habit of selling laptop that are equipped with NICs that become defective right after your warranty expires, get a new computer.

It's a school laptop... They wouldn't let that happen would they?

[bam13]

What's the best way to break up with someone that goes to another school?

[-zeroSKILL-]

Start dating other people and wait for her to find out. I'd also recommend not talking to her any more. If that doesn't get the message through, try telling her you're done.

[Cavernio]

Wake up at the same time everyday. Don't be an asshole and just give your gf 'signals', just tell her its over, in person preferably, and tell her why if she wants to know.

Take vitamin D if you find you can't lose weight even though you probably should be losing it. Unless you live in the sun you probaly aren't getting enough.

My problem is that every once in a while I get super depressed, and inevitably one day I wake up, decide I can't cope with life and then don't do anything for a few days. I tend to do that when I get stressed and can't get stuff done, such that I fail at what I was doing. And of course, afterwards, I'm super ashamed for quitting. Even though most of time I'm mentally very sound, I'm scared of doing anything that requires a lot of responsibility or effort from me, especially if that would be long-term or cost a lot of money (like more school or having a kid), because I'm worried I'm just going to shut down again. And of course when I'm not feeling depressed at all, I want to try for those things.