05-15-2009, 05:18 PM
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#24 |
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Cerebellumberjack
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: On a boat
Age: 33
Posts: 3,960
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Re: "Angel" My first love poem
You use a ****ing emoticon in the poem.
You use "walking on air". Eliminate both of these things and it will still be horrible, but not to the point that it's insulting the intelligence of the reader. edit: it appears you have fixed the emoticon. Good for you. |
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