Wheres the line, promiscuity.

[Zer0_Kool]

Hmm being someone who sees both sides I think to be honest its in everyones blood to being a little "unfaithful." I mean you can't say your past relationships don't pop up in your head and sometimes your like "yeah that was good sex" but its just that a thought. If you cheat or whatever you must have some reason. Maybe she was just a super hot girl and you couldn't control yourself. Your human it happens but admitting it is the first step into setting a boundary. But if you do it again that just means that your not ready for a closed relationship. Its just a part of what makes us human. Hey I can't lie some of my past relationships had good sex and sometimes I think about. Yeah sometimes I'm like "hmm I'd like to do it one more time" but would I do it given the chance? Probably not its cause I'm alone and the person I'm with isn't around. You wander but it doesn't mean I want it over what I got. But its all on how you view it. Whether it be that oral is considered sex that is your terms. Theirs alot of ball and chain in this but thats something you have to figure out. I know I was notorious for changing girls like I do underwear and if your doing that you better make sure your STD free. But eventually you will get tired of it. If not theres this thing called porn and in that business you meet different people 24/7.

[x After Dawn x]

Originally Posted by darkshark

All men want sex, it's the self-control factor that stops us.

Yes.

Originally Posted by darkshark

Most men also want to kill someone...it's all about the control.

This, I'm going to have to disagree with...not many men have the urge to kill someone. I'm sure many do, but definitely not close to the majority of men.

Originally Posted by GG_Guru

What's wrong with being a slut?

Oh gee, nothing, nothing at all. Dumbass.

[Necros140606]

Originally Posted by x After Dawn x

not many men have the urge to kill someone. I'm sure many do, but definitely not close to the majority of men.

you're wrong. any human would kill if that makes him/her survive. the reason you say so is that you haven't found yourself in a very critical situation, and your education does the rest, but killing is inside the nature of every living being, and you better know this well. the ones who think they're not supscetible to these istincts are the first ones to fall.

[x After Dawn x]

Originally Posted by Necros140606

you're wrong. any human would kill if that makes him/her survive. the reason you say so is that you haven't found yourself in a very critical situation, and your education does the rest, but killing is inside the nature of every living being, and you better know this well. the ones who think they're not supscetible to these istincts are the first ones to fall.

Sorry, but I don't live in a dog-eat-dog anarchist society.

[qqwref]

That's not really related, Necros. The point of the killing argument was to confirm/deny the statement "Most men also want to kill someone...it's all about the control." Having the urge to kill, and having to kill to survive, are two entirely different things. I don't deny that most people would kill someone else if (a) they could pull it off and (b) it really legitimately was the best thing to do in the situation (see: war), but that's a lot different than having an urge to kill and staving it off with self-control.

[poleaxe]

As long as u don't go whoring around with tons of people you're not a slut.

[Necros140606]

Originally Posted by qqwref

...that's a lot different than having an urge to kill and staving it off with self-control.

nope, it's not. everytime you feel you hate someone, there's a part of you which is pushing towards the elimination of the rival. do you ever read some psychology book? you don't know anything about how your own mind works, just like everyone else in this thread who declares such idiotic things about promiscuity.

[Tokzic]

Originally Posted by passivegirl

ontopic: even though you're a guy, IMO you shouldn't waste your body on someone unless you've been with them a verrrry long time and are truly passionate about them. it would also help if you planned on staying with them 'forever' and all that jazz.

This is the exact sort of mindless thinking that prudes love, and love to instill in their children.

What am I wasting when I fuck someone for the first time (besides semen, but don't worry, I'll make more)? My "virginity"? Oh bloody no. Tell me, do you remember the first time you played a board game? Was it a magical, memorable experience that overshadowed every other time you did it afterwards? What about your first haircut? Your first time eating a chocolate bar?

You probably don't. Want to know why? Because first times are completely overblown in importance for absolutely no reason. The only people who find sex a big deal are people who haven't had sex and people who have giant social problems that will repel the opposite gender forever.

Next question.

How about the OP.

Sluttiness is a very simple thing to measure.

1. Are you having sex over once a month?

No? Go to 3.

2. a) Are you responsible with conraception, using at least two forms when you have sex, and talking with your partner before about possibility of pregnancy?

If no, go to 4.

b) Are you responsible about your partners, only having sex with people you trust? This stops STDs and drama.

If no, go to 4.

c) Do you make sure that your partner is not emotionally invested (interested in you or taken) before engaging in casual sex?

If no, go to 4. Otherwise, keep trucking.

3. You're not slutty, or are an ex-slut.

4. You are promiscuous, but you are too dumb with sex for that to be an appropriate word. You are a slut.

Technically, promiscuity and sluttiness are interchangable save for the connotation, but I like to put that connotation to use. Promiscuity is a perfectly admirable trait if you are intelligent about sex. Contrary to the popular belief in this thread that lots of sex ALWAYS LEADS TO STDS OH NO, talking about it beforehand will prevent it better than any condom, and even better, having sex with only people you trust is a great way to stop them, too. Talking about what happens in the event of pregnancy is a must, too.

Most people are too dickheaded to do any of this, sadly, and end up with pregnancies that they didn't talk about with mothers that don't want to abort. Or have sex with complete strangers and get herpes.

Being an idiot about sex is what should be looked down upon. Don't take it out on promiscuity, people - I get plenty of tail from plenty of different girls, and my dick and parental status are clean.

ps necros is virtually the only one in this thread who has a clue what he's talking about

[Dr Tran]

tokzic knows what he's talking about

[passivegirl]

Now, you're relating sex to... playing a board game, eating candy, and getting a haircut? So you're a whore *and* boring in bed. No wonder you don't think anything of doing it.

Originally Posted by Tokzic

The only people who find sex a big deal are people who haven't had sex and people who have giant social problems that will repel the opposite gender forever.

On the contrary. The people who find sex a big deal are those who realize that sex is generally best when meaningful, and when you can truly relate to the person. Besides, when it's with someone you trust and know extremely well, you can even open up to them about all the strange fetishes you have (**** the Internet) for maximum goodness.

The rest of your post is mainly boring, but this made me lol:

Originally Posted by Tokzic

Promiscuity is a perfectly admirable trait if you are intelligent about sex.

wat


Have a good one.

[speeddemon]

Op: Should you really care? I mean seriously wouldn't it be better to be getting some rather than none at all? Honestly I'm still a virgin and i ****ing hate it. Be glad you have release with something more than your hand.

Other than that, I'm gonna have to agree with Tokzic, but maybe raise the bar a little higher than once a month.

[Necros140606]

Originally Posted by passivegirl

I would form a rebuttal to this, but 'prude' isn't a verb.

Now, you're relating sex to... playing a board game, eating candy, and getting a haircut? So you're a whore *and* boring in bed. No wonder you don't think anything of doing it.

On the contrary. The people who find sex a big deal are those who realize that sex is generally best when meaningful, and when you can truly relate to the person. Besides, when it's with someone you trust and know extremely well, you can even open up to them about all the strange fetishes you have (**** the Internet) for maximum goodness.

let me open a little pharentesis. we make a huge deal of sexuality because it's something that is firestamped in bold letters in our mind since we are children, labeled directly or indirectly as "immoral" or "dirty", "something you don't want others to know/see", "private" etcetera. i'm not saying you're wrong, nay, everything you say is actually right... with this mind setting we receive from our environment.

now, the question isn't whether your beliefs are right or not, but, if after your self-analisys, if you find those beliefs to be correct, logic and meaningful or the product of some mind distortion inherited from hundred years ago. you do your daily self-analisys, right?

the first time is meaningful as long as you make a whole culture about it, having doubts and extremely high expectations, but what should matter it's not how the FirSt TimE goes, but the moment itself of the union of the bodies and minds. being it your first, fifth or thirteenth time doesn't make any difference. the whole story about first time sex just doesn't make sense to me, as chances are high it won't be great, and waiting for years just makes you lose precious time and experience. it's not like you are more "ready" if you're 18 and stil virgin rather than 14.

Being a slut or not, having an active sexual life doesn't hurt anyone. The opposite, since you're following your body instincts, it makes you and the partner feel good (did you know that going against your istincts isn't healty?). The only way it could be defined negative is if you're careless about contraceptives and protection from sexual transmitted diseases. Trying to define boundaries in human behaviour only results in personal interpretations, which are ultimately meaningless.

[Emo_Saur_]

Well, have sex to have sex and have sex while being commited are two totally different things. Commited, say being 1 months. Sex for sex, lust, say eh 1 day to 2 1/2 weeks.

Being promiscious is doing and flaunting basically.

[korny]

I have sex at least once a week, I refuse to ever wear a condom (I pull out if I even finish), the girl I **** has a boyfriend and another girl i sometimes hook up with has slept and/or continues to sleep with other guys on a weekly basis as well. and if I meet a girl at a club, party or wherever and the mood is mutual between a girl I find attractive then it's going to go down. This is how I fulfill my sexual needs and I don't think I'm a slut by any means and the same would go for a girl who does what I do. The word slut in general is just too subjective. Promiscuity is fun and natural. There's no line, just go for it if as long as you know what you're doing

[Tokzic]

Originally Posted by passivegirl

I would form a rebuttal to this, but 'prude' isn't a verb.

Do you know what a verb is? I used it as a noun. You know... like it's usually used.

Originally Posted by passivegirl

Now, you're relating sex to... playing a board game, eating candy, and getting a haircut? So you're a whore *and* boring in bed. No wonder you don't think anything of doing it.

I'm relating the common misconception that the first time you have sex is fairy dust and unicorns to the first times for other activities. Just like these mundane activities, without having done them yet, people make crazy assumptions about them and blow them up in their minds because they haven't done them yet. Then, once they've done them, they realize that all of their expectations were way overblown, especially when it's worked up in their minds over long periods. Just because it's not a magical rollercoaster doesn't mean it's boring. Not a single activity in the world, including sex, is a magical rollercoaster.

Is this really that difficult for you to comprehend? Or is taking people out of context intentionally your way of trying to look cool on the internet?

also lmfao at "boring in bed", i guess i could be considered boring in bed if orgasming like a semi-automatic sounds dull to you

Originally Posted by passivegirl

On the contrary. The people who find sex a big deal are those who realize that sex is generally best when meaningful, and when you can truly relate to the person.

You're a virgin. You have no reliable experience whatsoever to make such ridiculous claims. All you have to go on are romantic comedies and love songs. Don't pretend you have a clue about when "sex is generally best" when you have no points of comparison - no points at all, actually.

[passivegirl]

My bad about the verb thing. But this forum isn't really about first times anyway. It's about repeatedly doing it with people you don't care about, whether it's right or not, and "where to draw the line". Your comparisons were just silly to me, though. It would make more sense if you related the first time having sex to something with a bit more of an impact than getting a haircut. You don't need to participate in something directly to have a 'certified' opinion on it.

[Necros140606]

Originally Posted by passivegirl

You don't need to participate in something directly to have a 'certified' opinion on it.

you don't have to, but your point isn't as valid as you don't have any fisrt-hand experience. also, the problem residing in the conception of first times is extremely relevant, because it's on the same thought line of considering any promiscuous sexual activity as a negative event.

after everything that has been said, we could conclude that being promiscuous (when considerate about STDs, pregnancy, even each other emotions (it's not like i would go with someone just because she's drunk, or someone that prefers a "stable relationship")) isn't harmful and is actually the most natural way to handle relationships. maybe when you think of someone you know who has such an active sexual life, it may not be your typical good guy/girl, but that's probably because the ones who go through the trouble of breaking social taboos aren't usually your respectful american citizens, in a way or the other.

in the end, the more you know and experiment, the best you can understand these mechanisms. just overthinking them starting from the biased information you receive sounds downright mindless and ultimately leads to huge trouble.

[Squeek]

passive: If you're suggesting that your first time will be great because it will be with someone you actually enjoy being with and you can share your fetishes with them, then wouldn't it be even better to get practice with other people so you can perform better for that true first time?

I'm not sure why people think sex is the only activity that you can be amazing at your very first time (oh wait i do know), but nothing else in life follows this pattern. Unless you are a savant genius, you will be horrible at something your first time doing it and it will hardly be something you remember as a positive experience. I don't remember the first time I started doing anything in my life, because I was horrible at all of them. I remember the first time I did special things related to those first times, but that's it.

For example, I don't remember when I first got on a bicycle, but I do remember the first time I successfully rode down my hill (I live on top of a super-steep hill) with no hands. People who still play FFR don't remember their first song (or much else about it other than their epic failure), but they'll surely remember the first time they passed Yoshi Bonus Round or something. Hell I barely ever played FFR and haven't played for 4 years and I still remember that day.

[mead1]

Seriously kids, get the **** over yourselves. Sex isn't a big deal if you do it responsibly, as summed up in tokzic's choose your own adventure wall of text. It's something fun to do that a lot of people take way too seriously.

[Bolth mannn]

I wholly agree with kommisar[os]'s post.

it all depends on how you look at sex.

i personally, am leaving sex for marriage. not because im religious or anything of the sort (i am christian but that doesnt change how I look at sex). Sex to me, is a sacred thing that should be left for the one you truly love. if you blow it with some random chick, you wont get the same feeling. you will, physically, but emotionally is what matters.

Thats why I call sex, making love. you cant make love if its with some random chick.

if your looking to it as sex only and your doing it for the pleasure, go for it, I won't look down on you. just be prepared for the consequences.