Depression + Anti-Depressants (a log) Updated 4-12-05

[deltro300111]

Ok, I am going to start logging how I feel, as I get more and more into the use of anti-depressants, starting with a synopsis of last week/feelings in general, please discuss.

Week 1- Wellbutron XL 150mg, 1 per day.
(Day Before)
Well, my parents saw that I was sort of sulking around, unhappy... and confronted me. We have a 2 or 3 hour conversation, with a lot of tearing, and a bit of fighting.

(Day of 1st dose)
My mom came home with a 1 week supply bottle of Wellbutron XL 150mg

(The following week)
I notice my mood, and work ethic increase significantly, things that my parents say that would usually annoy me (I could consciencely tell that they would have annoyed me o.O)didn't, and I really started to feel better. I stay up really late, and wake up perfectly awake, as if nothing had happened, and I can go through a morning without getting in a fight with my dad.

Week 2 Wellbutron XL 300mg 1 per day
(1st dose)
No significant increase in mood today, I took it a bit later then I did the preceeding week, and noticed a bit more tension between my parents and I, nothing too bad.

(Monday) 4-11-05
Well, there really is no high or low any more, I was either hyper or sad before I'd used these drugs, and now I'm completely neutral, some people at school notice changes, I haven't said that I'm on anti-depressants yet, I've been telling them that I am just tired, I guess that's what neutrality feels like to me. I kind of like it, I can sit and concentrate in class, without any want to pull out my calculator and play a game.

(Tuesday) 4-12-05
Wow, today I was very relaxed, I could still laugh, and have fun, but after the laughing was over, it was over.. I didn't get yelled at by any teachers or anything today, a nice change, I hope this progresses. On the way to gamestop (to reserve Guild Wars, (w00t)) my Dad said that he had also noticed a change, that I didn't really seem excited about anything anymore, nothing really grasped my emotion, I too have noticed this- but... he's just used to me always bouncing off the walls trying to get something to do. Meh, I like the way I feel about how I'm acting and how I'm performing much better now, then ever before... I hope to see more positive results.

(Wednesday) 4-13-05
We went on a band trip today, and I could sit there, and concentrate on my music, and play well without focusing/laughing at other peoples mistakes. I also noticed that the people around me were pretty hyper, and I didn't feel compelled to be hyper with them, I just kind of watched, and still I didn't feel left out. It really seems that people aren't writing me off as "that annoying kid" anymore... I like that. I also like that now I can concentrate, I can sit down and play a game, I think I am going to start working on learning C, now that I can concentrate.


I'm doing this log to try and document any changes, and possibly see if anyone notices changes in my typing style, or any thing like that... I myself am interested in seeing if this drug helps me any.