top things to say to a cop when you get pulled over.

[Linkisdoomed]

Do you know why I pulled you over?
-Hold on, just letting you know, I'm a little drunk right now.
What? Really? Sir I'm going to have to ask you to ste-
-And there's a gun in my glovebox.
GET OUT OF THE CAR!
-And I've got weed stashed in the seat.
ON THE GROUND!
-There's also a body in the trunk.
*Calls in for backup.*
--I understand that you've a gun in your glovebox?
No, let me show you.
--Weed in your seats?
Sir, I just bought these, no way I'd tear these apart.
--Could you pop the trunk for me?
Sure.
--He told me there was a body in here.
Pfft, and I be he told you I was speeding too.