Guys: Could you marry someone who couldn't give you kids?

[GuidoHunter]

How can you not want to have kids? Honestly, i think saying you don't want kids is just a phase. It seems to me that everyone will eventually have a natural instinct to want to be a father or mother, and that's what should happen. I remember not wanting kids, that phase lasted for about a year or so, but eventually it went away. I would be very dissapointed to die without being a father.

Very true. I've seen it happen to a couple of my friends. ::winks::

I love kids, and can't wait to have my own. Okay, so I can wait, but I'm really eager to get into a position to have them.

--Guido

http://andy.mikee385.com

[Chrissi]

I'd make a comment about position, but this is the critical thinking forum, so I'll refrain.

[Laharl]

Haw. :P Not really.

Now, for the side of all the girls, let's assume the guy they want to marry is unable to have kids. That makes it all fair and balanced, right? Right.

Anyway, it would be really hard for me, I'm sure. My dad asked me what the 5 top goals I have in my life are. Those are 1) getting married in a temple 2) raising a family 3) having a job where I won't ever have to worry about financial insecurity 4) writing a novel, and 5) knowing I made a difference in the lives of the people I call friends. In that order, I might add.

Family is an important thing for me. But, I know that love comes first... if there was a woman I met that was unable to bear children but I knew she completed me, then I'd be a fool to give that up. It's not the same, but adopting is a completely valid thing to do. I know I'd love an adopted child as much as any I was able to create.

[ayanepuck]

Family is exceedingly important to me, and I agree with y'all who are saying that not wanting to have kids is a phase. I know that for a fact because I was in that phase all through high school. (I was in a lot of other phases too, but that isn't the point here....) I think it is great that many men are saying that love is more important....it sure shot my opinion of the male sex up a notch...
One of my best friends has a nephew that I adore. I actually got to hold him for the first time I few months ago. He was getting fairly restless, so I started to sway back and forth, bouncing slightly. He fell right to sleep in my arms, and I have to say, that moment instantly became one of my top five favorite memories. Having a litte child feel safe enough to fall asleep in your arms was (and is) the most amazing feeling. When I think of how great that felt, I can't help but think about how much greater it will feel when the child is a product of me and the man I love. (I know, it's corny, but I saw Spider-Man 2 last night...ya know, it put me in a corny romantic mood.) =)

[BigT111]

yeah I agree too, you know i wouldn't make that the most important thing i look for in a woman, but it wouldnt stop me from marrying the person i love

[jazzmosis]

I never knew Spiderman-2 could make people feel romantic... heh.

I'm really just repeating what others have said, but I could easily marry a woman that couldn't have kids. Here's a different, but more controversal kids. Would you have a kid if the odds were it would have a physical disability? I mean.. 90% or more.

[TheAppleEater]

I don't think I would have a kid if I knew he/she were going to have a physical disability, because I wouldn't want him/her to have to live like that.

But about the phase i could understand that, because right now I would never want to raise a child, but I know that I will in the future.

[Moogy]

I'd make a comment about position, but this is the critical thinking forum, so I'll refrain.

*rimshot*

[Kefit]

I hate little kids.

Which is kind of ironic, because I work at a toy store.

I'm nineteen now, and throughout my life I have never really felt those close family ties or values that others seem to have. And its not from a lack of love or anything - my parents love me to death, and I get along well with the rest of my family. I realize the importance of my family in my life, but I just don't fell all that closely bonded to them.

This lack of family values extends to me feeling that there is no reason whatsoever for me to start a family of my own. All I see it doing would be drastically cutting back my freedom to live my life how I choose.

I guess what it comes down to is that I don't want to waste time on kids that I could be using to enjoy my on time in this world. Maybe this is only a phase I am going through though. I still have a lot of life left ahead of me, so I guess I'll see what happens.

[Snoopy4175]

No kids? Sure...i would. There's no reason not to. Some ppl have some issues with adopting, but i wouldn't care. If we're really meant to have a family, then everything will work out great!

[ayanepuck]

I have no problem with adoption. I think it is a wonderful thing.

[evilbutterfly]

Hell, I'd rather adopt and skip the whole helpless infant phase. Less work.

I'm so heartless sometimes....oh well

[TheTypist]

I hate little kids.

Hey, that is a phase! I'm just like that too, for now.

But do you know why the immune system and a few other things start to slow down once you approach your 30s? Two words: child birth. Your body is designed to try and keep you alive and in top condition for the prime age of child birth.

Now, what should usually happen is that once you're old enough, you realize that you do want to carry on your legacy and your family name, and that once that little kid is your own (assuming it's conceived under the right circumstances) you will love it as your parents love you.

Now I don't think there's anything wrong with living childless, but this whole bloody selfish American attitude of "I want to live my life my way" is going to be the downfall of our civilization! The only reason our population is still growing is because of our immigrants, who as you very well know will outnumber everyone else is a couple of decades. But do we care?

If you want to make an impact, or influence someone you love in a different way, fine. But don't be a hypocrite by dismissing having kids as not being an influence in their lives.

If you're not even thinking of positively influencing the world as we know it, well...



Forums are a great way to indirectly vent your rage. I feel so much better now.

[Moogy]

Yeah, because America is the only country in the world.

[Kefit]

If you want to make an impact, or influence someone you love in a different way, fine. But don't be a hypocrite by dismissing having kids as not being an influence in their lives.

What the hell?

When did I dismiss kids as being an influence in the lives of others?

You will notice in my post that I use the word 'I' a lot. This is because I am refering to myself, and my own feelings towards the matter. I do not feel my life would be positively influenced by children. As such, it would be irresponsible to myself if I were to have one. I realize that this is not true for everyone, but the idea of others never even came into my post.

I live for myself. I know that this makes me selfish in the eyes of many. But I really don't give a damn. My life is mine to live in whatever way I choose.