my poem-i need you...to love me

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  • imajrockette
    FFR Player
    • Apr 2007
    • 36

    #1

    my poem-i need you...to love me



    I need you day and night and without you by my side i'm slowly dying...

    I cry every night becuase now i know that you were lying.

    You gave me cards and you gave me poems...all of them said "i love you" but i guess they were all just lies becuase now i'm all alone.

    I miss you so much and i love you still...even though you put me through hell.

    I'm sitting at home rereading your poems and remembering all those lies that you told me.

    You said that you loved me and would never hurt me to.I guess they just were'nt true.

    I would never hurt you or make you cry or even tell you one stupid lie.

    I remember the first time i saw you.You immediately caught my eye and thats when i fell in love for the first time.

    I thought we wer meant to be just you and me but that was yet another lie...that will never come true.

    The main think that i wanted to tell you is that i need you with me so please come back,please love me more and don't hold back.

    I wish that you had never lied and then i would'nt have to cry day and night.

    I want you now,needed you then,just please come back so we can start again....


    ▄▀ ♥◘ ▄▀ ♥◘ music is love▄▀ ♥◘
  • championanwar
    Ask Nuro! x3
    FFR Simfile Author
    FFR Music Producer
    • Jun 2004
    • 2588

    #2
    Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

    I really like this poem. Quite sad, but i guess that was the meaning you were trying to portray.

    Originally posted by aperson
    all of 65dos are dumb an noticable because their idea of 7/8 is 4/4 with one beat cut off the end
    aperson: yo shikari if u c thom yorke
    aperson: plz tell him 2 start usin consonants again
    Click Here

    Comment

    • orly101
      FFR Player
      • Sep 2006
      • 190

      #3
      Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

      wow, i looked at it for 10 seconds and i got bored :P

      Comment

      • Dimitri13
        FFR Player
        • Jun 2004
        • 701

        #4
        Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

        yaaay more teen angsty crybaby poems!


        Originally posted by Tibs
        Originally posted by arsonistsgetallthegirls
        changing Antarctica into a desert
        good thing theres lots of sand under all the ice

        Comment

        • ShastaTwist
          FFR Veteran
          • Sep 2004
          • 599

          #5
          Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

          Hey, hey...

          I have an idea.

          Instead of bashing her poems, why don't you write one so that we can all beat it to death too?

          Comment

          • toxicninja
            FFR Player
            • Jan 2007
            • 77

            #6
            Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

            Originally posted by Dimitri13
            yaaay more teen angsty crybaby poems!
            this

            Comment

            • phe0nixblade
              Praise the sun mofo
              • Sep 2005
              • 4281

              #7
              Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

              Originally posted by toxicninja
              this
              is Spartaaaa!!!!

              Comment

              • bluguerrilla
                FFR Player
                FFR Simfile Author
                • Apr 2006
                • 3966

                #8
                Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

                Originally posted by ShastaTwist
                Hey, hey...

                I have an idea.

                Instead of bashing her poems, why don't you write one so that we can all beat it to death too?
                Ok, here we go:

                Shatter the fragile
                Glass broken never mended
                Fire within dies



                Bad enough? (I know it wasn't directed at me but I don't really care)

                Comment

                • lexis_is_icecold24
                  FFR Player
                  • Jul 2005
                  • 260

                  #9
                  Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

                  Originally posted by ShastaTwist
                  Hey, hey...

                  I have an idea.

                  Instead of bashing her poems, why don't you write one so that we can all beat it to death too?
                  Alright, go for it. This is an oldie..

                  "I'm For the Sun"

                  As links become the chain,
                  as drops become the rain,
                  as flames become the fire,
                  as voices become the choir,
                  as steps become a dance,
                  when can we,
                  you and me,
                  have our chance?

                  Don't run resonating Sun.
                  I fear of when the day is done,
                  the darkness that we may become.


                  Comment

                  • fido123
                    FFR Player
                    • Sep 2005
                    • 4245

                    #10
                    Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

                    lol feelings

                    Comment

                    • beaner692
                      FFR Player
                      • Oct 2006
                      • 1071

                      #11
                      Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

                      Originally posted by Dimitri13
                      yaaay more teen angsty crybaby poems!
                      wow, what an asshole =D


                      wewt10k aim: IMB3AU


                      http://video.google.com/videoplay?do...&q=vertex+beta
                      I play Vertex BETA :O

                      Comment

                      • bluguerrilla
                        FFR Player
                        FFR Simfile Author
                        • Apr 2006
                        • 3966

                        #12
                        Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

                        Originally posted by lexis_is_icecold24
                        Alright, go for it. This is an oldie..

                        "I'm For the Sun"

                        As links become the chain,
                        as drops become the rain,
                        as flames become the fire,
                        as voices become the choir,
                        as steps become a dance,
                        when can we,
                        you and me,
                        have our chance?

                        Don't run resonating Sun.
                        I fear of when the day is done,
                        the darkness that we may become.
                        Bashing: The first half sounds like a kinky valentine's day card.

                        Other than that I actually liked it.

                        Comment

                        • ShastaTwist
                          FFR Veteran
                          • Sep 2004
                          • 599

                          #13
                          Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

                          I didn't mean in her thread.

                          Read the rules. :]

                          Comment

                          • bluguerrilla
                            FFR Player
                            FFR Simfile Author
                            • Apr 2006
                            • 3966

                            #14
                            Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

                            Originally posted by ShastaTwist
                            I didn't mean in her thread.

                            Read the rules. :]
                            Well mine was more of a response to this thread and there's no way I'm making a thread for any of my poetry, not gonna happen...

                            Comment

                            • ShastaTwist
                              FFR Veteran
                              • Sep 2004
                              • 599

                              #15
                              Re: my poem-i need you...to love me

                              In any case, to the author:

                              As I've said in your previously posted poems, you really need to work on taking your long lines and turning them into stanzas and multiple lines. The long lines and lack of stanzas make your poem look sloppy and more like a story.

                              Comment

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