Every girl in my life has bailed on me in some way shape or form, save for one...
Latest example, my friend Maria. I've been friends with her since last semester. She was in my Spanish class. She had a boyfriend at the time. She's pretty attractive, great girl, involved in Student Government, etc. What I quickly learned was that she had a rather weird view on things.
She went to Spain for a month on a group trip after last semester. She'd get online there just to talk to me. She even got me a small gift (keychain that opens up with pictures of place there, and on the other side she wrote a few sentences). I stuck by her as a friend. She had said previously that people tend to give up on her and bail. I was happy with who she was and everything. We hung out only once in the summer. At that time, her and her boyfriend had broken up. We had a picnic in the park. It was her idea and a date. The date was wonderful; we were there for two hours. After that, we talked twice the rest of the summer. She was busy and didn't want to make time for anyone.
Since we've been back, she hasn't wanted a relationship (boyfriend). I was fine with that; I was happy with how things were. She made ravioli at her apartment for me. We've talked online here and there. A few weeks ago, her computer crapped out when typing a paper late at night. She called and asked if she could come over and use mine. I let her, of course. She was so happy with me. I could tell she adored me. I was happy with her. The friendship was great, even though she didn't ever make time for me. She's always kept a small distance. Whenever she would seem wary of my intentions, I always cleared it up. I let her know I was happy with how things were, I respect her end, etc.
That was all true. She would say things like "I heart you." Again, I knew she thought the world of me. I think that scared her? I'm not sure. She's been worried about my feelings, but like I said, I've always kept it clear. We understood each other.
On Monday, we talked a little bit online. I messaged her when she had an away message up saying she was doing homework, and that she needed a distraction. She messaged me a few minutes later, and we talked for a few minutes. Then this (mind you, she's always had weird analogies/sayings... it's her thing):
[22:23] Maria: i got to homework, i'll catchya later
[22:23] banditcom: alright :-/
[22:24] Maria: *pushing*
[22:24] banditcom: ?
[22:24] Maria: nm
She promptly went back away. I'm like wtf'ing to myself. Now, I talked to her about 25-30 minutes ago.
[01:25] banditcom: hola
[01:25] Maria: hi
[01:25] banditcom: sup?
[01:25] Maria: nada, just returned
[01:25] banditcom: oo from?
[01:26] Maria: florida
[01:26] banditcom: lol
[01:26] banditcom: sure..
[01:26] banditcom: so what'd you mean last time by *pushing*?
[01:27] Maria: hmmmm....
[01:27] Maria: not really going to describe it presently.
[01:27] banditcom: alright..
[01:27] Maria: don't really feel like using all of the adjectives it would require. a four letter word like push in the present tense worked best
[01:27] banditcom: i feel like you've been distancing yourself even more from me.. i don't know why
[01:29] Maria: i have been
[01:29] banditcom: hmm
[01:31] banditcom: alright..
[01:31] Maria: i don't know what to say????
[01:32] banditcom: neither do i.. except.. why?
[01:34] Maria: cause i feel like i have a mosquito bite on my ass
[01:34] Maria: and it has turned into a scab
[01:34] Maria: and now i have puss in my ass
[01:34] banditcom: uhh
[01:35] banditcom: that makes no sense whatsoever but okay
[01:36] Maria: its not supposed to.
[01:40] banditcom: well, im going to quit trying then... let me know when you decide to be friends with me
[01:40] Maria: ok
...
Seriously, this hurts.. a lot... and I had recently let her know how I was happy with how things were (but also I would like it if she made more time for me.. which she agreed). And now this? I had no idea this would happen with her and I. I mean, yea, girls have always bailed on me for no reason, or they just don't know why they did (supposedly).
I really have no idea what's wrong. I can't ever figure out why girls continue to do this to me. I've tried countless approaches.
What's ironic... is that some girls who have told me they don't understand why other girls do this, DO IT THEMSELVES AND DON'T HAVE AN EXPLANATION. No matter what I fucking do, I get fucked over.
Cliff Notes: Girls bail on me with no explanation because they either don't know why they did it or don't have a reason (supposedly). Other girls can't figure it out, and even those girls do the same thing.
Latest example, my friend Maria. I've been friends with her since last semester. She was in my Spanish class. She had a boyfriend at the time. She's pretty attractive, great girl, involved in Student Government, etc. What I quickly learned was that she had a rather weird view on things.
She went to Spain for a month on a group trip after last semester. She'd get online there just to talk to me. She even got me a small gift (keychain that opens up with pictures of place there, and on the other side she wrote a few sentences). I stuck by her as a friend. She had said previously that people tend to give up on her and bail. I was happy with who she was and everything. We hung out only once in the summer. At that time, her and her boyfriend had broken up. We had a picnic in the park. It was her idea and a date. The date was wonderful; we were there for two hours. After that, we talked twice the rest of the summer. She was busy and didn't want to make time for anyone.
Since we've been back, she hasn't wanted a relationship (boyfriend). I was fine with that; I was happy with how things were. She made ravioli at her apartment for me. We've talked online here and there. A few weeks ago, her computer crapped out when typing a paper late at night. She called and asked if she could come over and use mine. I let her, of course. She was so happy with me. I could tell she adored me. I was happy with her. The friendship was great, even though she didn't ever make time for me. She's always kept a small distance. Whenever she would seem wary of my intentions, I always cleared it up. I let her know I was happy with how things were, I respect her end, etc.
That was all true. She would say things like "I heart you." Again, I knew she thought the world of me. I think that scared her? I'm not sure. She's been worried about my feelings, but like I said, I've always kept it clear. We understood each other.
On Monday, we talked a little bit online. I messaged her when she had an away message up saying she was doing homework, and that she needed a distraction. She messaged me a few minutes later, and we talked for a few minutes. Then this (mind you, she's always had weird analogies/sayings... it's her thing):
[22:23] Maria: i got to homework, i'll catchya later
[22:23] banditcom: alright :-/
[22:24] Maria: *pushing*
[22:24] banditcom: ?
[22:24] Maria: nm
She promptly went back away. I'm like wtf'ing to myself. Now, I talked to her about 25-30 minutes ago.
[01:25] banditcom: hola
[01:25] Maria: hi
[01:25] banditcom: sup?
[01:25] Maria: nada, just returned
[01:25] banditcom: oo from?
[01:26] Maria: florida
[01:26] banditcom: lol
[01:26] banditcom: sure..
[01:26] banditcom: so what'd you mean last time by *pushing*?
[01:27] Maria: hmmmm....
[01:27] Maria: not really going to describe it presently.
[01:27] banditcom: alright..
[01:27] Maria: don't really feel like using all of the adjectives it would require. a four letter word like push in the present tense worked best
[01:27] banditcom: i feel like you've been distancing yourself even more from me.. i don't know why
[01:29] Maria: i have been
[01:29] banditcom: hmm
[01:31] banditcom: alright..
[01:31] Maria: i don't know what to say????
[01:32] banditcom: neither do i.. except.. why?
[01:34] Maria: cause i feel like i have a mosquito bite on my ass
[01:34] Maria: and it has turned into a scab
[01:34] Maria: and now i have puss in my ass
[01:34] banditcom: uhh
[01:35] banditcom: that makes no sense whatsoever but okay
[01:36] Maria: its not supposed to.
[01:40] banditcom: well, im going to quit trying then... let me know when you decide to be friends with me
[01:40] Maria: ok
...
Seriously, this hurts.. a lot... and I had recently let her know how I was happy with how things were (but also I would like it if she made more time for me.. which she agreed). And now this? I had no idea this would happen with her and I. I mean, yea, girls have always bailed on me for no reason, or they just don't know why they did (supposedly).
I really have no idea what's wrong. I can't ever figure out why girls continue to do this to me. I've tried countless approaches.
What's ironic... is that some girls who have told me they don't understand why other girls do this, DO IT THEMSELVES AND DON'T HAVE AN EXPLANATION. No matter what I fucking do, I get fucked over.
Cliff Notes: Girls bail on me with no explanation because they either don't know why they did it or don't have a reason (supposedly). Other girls can't figure it out, and even those girls do the same thing.
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