Some of my poetry.

[la]

Re: Some of my poetry.

Leaving

The day dawns cold; silver, crisp, and clear.
While every puddle on the street is now a twilit mirror.
Noises are muted, movements are slow,
There is not a friend, nor any foe--

As I step, silently and sure,
Time seems to pause- the world does not stir.
Into a clay world, is where I am headed
My previous life, willinging shredded.

Like paper under scissors, I cut out a shape.
Like clay under hand, I mold my own fate.
The time has arrived to become untwined,
Even though it means, leaving you behind.

I'll leave you now, into this twilit lane--
Maybe soon I'll grasp, what I've hoped to attain.
The day was silent; silver, crisp, and clear;
As I walked, from my life, wihtout a trace of fear.
------------------

Took long enough to write; Though, perhaps it wasn't worth it.

[RandomPscho]

Re: Some of my poetry.

La I like that one, leaving.

My only critique is that last line. Something about it doesn't flow together, but the rest of the poem is awesome.