Love- What is it?

**Specforces** · 04-23-2004, 02:23 PM

This is my last Critical Thinking post before the cruise, enjoy,

Perhaps my greatest question aside from what the point of existing even is would be does love exist? Seriously think about it. Because I have a hard time believing it does. I'm extremely cynical by nature so I analyze everything and when I look at people I always think of motive before anything else. Like all these people who get married and divorce within the first year how they claim they fall out of love, I don't even think 90% of the world has a clue what love is. Most people have this magical perception of love being this thing that lasts forever. But when you look at it love really just falls into a few distinct catagories all of them are selfish. Love is convienent, love makes us feel good so we want it, love gives us social status, love usually increases our wealth, and basically when all of those things fails, when it no longer becomes convienent, when it makes us feel like crap instead of really good, when financial problems arise, well then the "love" has passed, time for a divorce.

It just seems like this is the basic principle that society as a whole follows. A divorce rate at 50% is absolutely pathetic. When I hear people say they are in love I just want to vomit up lunch. Sometimes I feel like saying something like oh would you be in love still if your signifigant other was just doused in gasoline and lit up like a tourch, I don't think so.

So in the beginning so called "love" is mostly physical attraction with a nice emotional complacency to it, then in the next step of love we jump into less physical attration and more convienent and financially pleasing. Most divorce is caused by financial difficulties so it wouldn't surprise me in the least if the way I see things is totally true.

So love the way most people see it isn't love at all. The meaning of the word love is rarely if ever seen in any human. Alot of people will make a case of well dying for someone you love is the ultimate sacrifice, but hey couldn't that be selfish too? What's easier to do, die for someone you care about or live the rest of your life knowing that you could have saved them but chose not too. So you are being selfish by making them live with your death on their hands the rest of their life while you get to die instead of vice-versa. Yes I know extremely cynical but at this point in my life I cannot trust any girl I date, infact I rarely date, my last long term relationship was 3 years ago. I cannot find this so called love that people claim exists when I am with a girl all I see are the things behind it. Relationships are so fragile a mear sentence can rip them apart. It's amazing to me how much emotion we put into things like that when it can be destroyed so easily. Could love really be destroyed that easily? I don't think so, I think love does exist, but none of us can have this love. It's a concept, like world peace, but it doesn't actually exist in our everyday lives and it never will. We only blind ourselves into thinking it does so we can feel comfortable and remove our worries and fears. I think that is where hope fits into love as well, because with each relationship that fails we "hope" the next one will be the one where we find "true love" even though true love is just a concept. Hope is basically denial on the highest form, hope is made of the things we deny that we absolutely refuse to believe are not true such as love. So we spend our lives endlessly searching for this thing we call love using our hope to continue on everytime we fail to find it. In the end I see no point in any of it. I cannot find a reason for anything. I have absolutely no desire to live the rest of my life. Everything in this world just seems so fake, it disgusts me, does anyone else feel this way?

Specforces

**nickadeemus** · 04-23-2004, 05:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Specforces

So we spend our lives endlessly searching for this thing we call love using our hope to continue on everytime we fail to find it. In the end I see no point in any of it. I cannot find a reason for anything. I have absolutely no desire to live the rest of my life. Everything in this world just seems so fake, it disgusts me, does anyone else feel this way?

You say "we" like you are doing it, along with everyone else in this world. If you believe so strongly that love doesn't exist, don't bother with it. There is no law requiring you to find love in your life, it's just a "normal" thing that society has made a big deal out of.

I can't give you a reason for anything in this world because I, too, believe that there is no point in anything. If I have kids, I'll soon be dead. They will soon be dead also. If they make a difference in the world, it won't matter because the Earth will NOT last forever. If we manage to travel elsewhere to start a new civilization, that will eventually be meaningless too. "On a long enough timeline, the survival rate for everyone drops to zero." If you manage to find a "love" in your life, big deal, you have accomplished nothing, as you will soon be dead. There is nothing to live for in the long run, other than death. The only point I can find in life is to do stuff that will temporarily appease your body and mind, don't let worries or the need to find "love" stop you from being happy. Life is a lot better when you are happy, so anything that bothers you now, just let it go because it doesn't matter.

Privateer · 04-23-2004, 06:07 PM

In general, you have a good grasp on what "love" really is, and I would agree with you on a lot of what you said. Relationships are quite fragile.

As your post continued, you got a little too personal, and you were a bit more radical; the last few sentences in particular.

DracIV · 04-23-2004, 06:19 PM

Although what nickaademus said was insanely cynical, he has a major point: don't let anything bother you because it doesn't matter, life is about happiness. I believe that is enough to make it so it doesn't even MATTER that life only means death. If you are happy, who cares that you will die? Who cares if it has no true effect as long as you are happy. There's a reason we have religion and a heaven.

Back to Spec's thread, I have seen love. What you mention is not love but lust and greed and petty desires. Love is the bond between two people that is so strong that they cannot be seperated by poverty nor pain. The only thing that can shake a bond like love is when one of the people is changed greatly for the worse (drug addiction, alcoholism, etc.), and even then most bonds are not broken. Love is a connection between two people that is so deep and powerful that they cannot be seperated. It has nothing to do with physical attraction or greed, it has to do with finding a partner who so matches you that you are inseperable. Love is the intertwining of two people's souls, the connecting of the true essences of who they are. I have seen it happen often, but rarely is it seen in those petty relationships that depend on a single sentence or that are done out of physical attraction. Love can only happen when you find the right person. It may never happen for you. Mostly, dating is the search or physical attraction and short-term relationships to keep people feeling like they have found love when they have not. The proof of love is when you see a couple that is 90 years old and they are totally happy with each other, even if they have nearly nothing else in the world. Love is what makes old age the hope of many. The bond of love should last even when one of the two is dead. Possibly even when both are dead.

If you listened to all that, good job.

SUSUGAM · 04-23-2004, 10:39 PM

Hmm... should i bother getting into this? I guess so... personally... i feel like love is the meaning of life... or the best description of it... find your soulmate... and strive to be completely happy. Love to me is when you find the "prefect imperfection," that being out there that becomes your entire life focus. Sure... some say love is blind... and it sure as hell is. Im not sure if anyone can have proof that they are in love... but as far as they know... its fact. Love is the completion of soul... not just an intertwining, its like a covalent bond of souls

sharing parts of each other souls with the other to make both of you whole. I see it as the ultimate emotion...

And before you ask... I feel like I've found it, personally. Which I get more crap for than I can explain... but honestly i dont give a damn. I think everyone is capable of love, and many will find it. And if my "significant other was doused in gasoline and lit ablaze..." yes... I'd still love them. And could never imagine sharing the feeling for anyone else in life. When my love fades, as will my life. Because they are inter-dependant.

Other than that... i can't explain anything but my own personal experience.

04-23-2004, 11:19 PM

Only self-pitying people would rather be dead than live without their loved one.

Love is about connecting with someone else, not just base physical attraction. Love is never fragile - if what you have is fragile, it's not love.

SUSUGAM · 04-23-2004, 11:22 PM

Fragile and LOVE do not go together, definately. I don't consider it self-pity... just a loss of the meaning of life... hence the end of it.

Tsuguri · 04-24-2004, 07:13 PM

Simply put, love is the greatest of gifts and the cruelest of curses, all rolled in to one nice little package. It is the beginning of too few lives and the ending of too many. Love is also, in my opinion, the single, most misinterpreted thing on earth, often having lust being mistaken for it.

**Specforces** · 04-24-2004, 07:17 PM

I was pissed when I wrote this, I'm not depressed.

Specforces

Tsuguri · 04-24-2004, 07:24 PM

Entirely understandable. We've probably all been there. Hope you feel better now though.

fusi0n · 04-24-2004, 07:33 PM

JustJono · 04-25-2004, 02:45 AM

Love may not exist, but according to Einstein, it exists and it doesn't exist at the same time! So it exists!

Ok anyway, yes, I believe in love. I believe in "the one(s)" and "soul mates". But I don't believe there's a high chance of ever meeting that person. Go to a chatroom, randomly pick a chatter. Exit the chatroom, and calculate the chances of you two ever bumping into eachother in real life. Really low chances there.

I had/have (blah) a philosophy that our purpose in life is purpose. That we feed off a purpose, finish it, and find another one. Even if we can't find one, looking for one is still a purpose. This is what love seems to really impress me with; because true love isn't like that. You find the one person you love, and you stick with that person, and you don't mind doing it. You don't go look for a different girl/guy.

Jam930 · 04-25-2004, 02:55 AM

love is when two people care alot for the eachother's well being, and feel a connection with them.

Spec do you love your mother?

perfect_fat · 04-25-2004, 03:18 AM

Love is a emotional reaction to a biological neccessity.

Yeah, you guessed it, I'm a romantic.

**Specforces** · 04-25-2004, 05:59 AM

Yeah Yeah, Love, whatever, I was pissed when I wrote that, don't take it literally, maybe I should have just listened to some Linkin Park.

Specforces

PS. I hate Linkin Park

Jam930 · 04-25-2004, 08:03 AM

were you pissed when u made your new sig? no offense. but u went from some nice complicated one, to some soldier screwed in the desert, to some kind of bat-skull-terminator devil surounded by explosions of poison. quite different from the cute little chibi specforces in your av.

PS. Linkin park sux.

RobbyZero · 04-25-2004, 08:07 AM

(What is love baby don't hurt me,dont hurt me no more )

Love that song :P

Anyways... Love - What is it? I don't have the slightest clue

04-25-2004, 08:11 AM

Hahahaha Robby, I was actually thinking of the Haddaway song when I read the topic name.

RobbyZero · 04-25-2004, 08:15 AM

Good times...

Night at the Roxbury ( one of the greatest movies )

Tsuguri · 04-25-2004, 07:18 PM

SNL skits fo ever baby.

04-23-2004, 02:23 PM	#1
Specforces Yes Join Date: Jan 2004 Age: 37 Posts: 5,028	Love- What is it? This is my last Critical Thinking post before the cruise, enjoy, Perhaps my greatest question aside from what the point of existing even is would be does love exist? Seriously think about it. Because I have a hard time believing it does. I'm extremely cynical by nature so I analyze everything and when I look at people I always think of motive before anything else. Like all these people who get married and divorce within the first year how they claim they fall out of love, I don't even think 90% of the world has a clue what love is. Most people have this magical perception of love being this thing that lasts forever. But when you look at it love really just falls into a few distinct catagories all of them are selfish. Love is convienent, love makes us feel good so we want it, love gives us social status, love usually increases our wealth, and basically when all of those things fails, when it no longer becomes convienent, when it makes us feel like crap instead of really good, when financial problems arise, well then the "love" has passed, time for a divorce. It just seems like this is the basic principle that society as a whole follows. A divorce rate at 50% is absolutely pathetic. When I hear people say they are in love I just want to vomit up lunch. Sometimes I feel like saying something like oh would you be in love still if your signifigant other was just doused in gasoline and lit up like a tourch, I don't think so. So in the beginning so called "love" is mostly physical attraction with a nice emotional complacency to it, then in the next step of love we jump into less physical attration and more convienent and financially pleasing. Most divorce is caused by financial difficulties so it wouldn't surprise me in the least if the way I see things is totally true. So love the way most people see it isn't love at all. The meaning of the word love is rarely if ever seen in any human. Alot of people will make a case of well dying for someone you love is the ultimate sacrifice, but hey couldn't that be selfish too? What's easier to do, die for someone you care about or live the rest of your life knowing that you could have saved them but chose not too. So you are being selfish by making them live with your death on their hands the rest of their life while you get to die instead of vice-versa. Yes I know extremely cynical but at this point in my life I cannot trust any girl I date, infact I rarely date, my last long term relationship was 3 years ago. I cannot find this so called love that people claim exists when I am with a girl all I see are the things behind it. Relationships are so fragile a mear sentence can rip them apart. It's amazing to me how much emotion we put into things like that when it can be destroyed so easily. Could love really be destroyed that easily? I don't think so, I think love does exist, but none of us can have this love. It's a concept, like world peace, but it doesn't actually exist in our everyday lives and it never will. We only blind ourselves into thinking it does so we can feel comfortable and remove our worries and fears. I think that is where hope fits into love as well, because with each relationship that fails we "hope" the next one will be the one where we find "true love" even though true love is just a concept. Hope is basically denial on the highest form, hope is made of the things we deny that we absolutely refuse to believe are not true such as love. So we spend our lives endlessly searching for this thing we call love using our hope to continue on everytime we fail to find it. In the end I see no point in any of it. I cannot find a reason for anything. I have absolutely no desire to live the rest of my life. Everything in this world just seems so fake, it disgusts me, does anyone else feel this way? Specforces __________________ Check Out My Music

04-23-2004, 06:07 PM	#3
Privateer FFR Player Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: NJ Posts: 2,962	In general, you have a good grasp on what "love" really is, and I would agree with you on a lot of what you said. Relationships are quite fragile. As your post continued, you got a little too personal, and you were a bit more radical; the last few sentences in particular. __________________

04-24-2004, 07:17 PM	#9
Specforces Yes Join Date: Jan 2004 Age: 37 Posts: 5,028	I was pissed when I wrote this, I'm not depressed. Specforces __________________ Check Out My Music

04-24-2004, 07:33 PM	#11
fusi0n FFR Player Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Indianapolis, IN Age: 36 Posts: 2,158	<3 __________________

04-25-2004, 02:45 AM	#12
JustJono FFR Player Join Date: Nov 2003 Posts: 283	Love may not exist, but according to Einstein, it exists and it doesn't exist at the same time! So it exists! Ok anyway, yes, I believe in love. I believe in "the one(s)" and "soul mates". But I don't believe there's a high chance of ever meeting that person. Go to a chatroom, randomly pick a chatter. Exit the chatroom, and calculate the chances of you two ever bumping into eachother in real life. Really low chances there. I had/have (blah) a philosophy that our purpose in life is purpose. That we feed off a purpose, finish it, and find another one. Even if we can't find one, looking for one is still a purpose. This is what love seems to really impress me with; because true love isn't like that. You find the one person you love, and you stick with that person, and you don't mind doing it. You don't go look for a different girl/guy. __________________ Jonathan Cruz http://www.mp3unsigned.com/Jono.asp

04-23-2004, 06:19 PM	#4
DracIV FFR Player Join Date: Nov 2003 Posts: 298	Although what nickaademus said was insanely cynical, he has a major point: don't let anything bother you because it doesn't matter, life is about happiness. I believe that is enough to make it so it doesn't even MATTER that life only means death. If you are happy, who cares that you will die? Who cares if it has no true effect as long as you are happy. There's a reason we have religion and a heaven. Back to Spec's thread, I have seen love. What you mention is not love but lust and greed and petty desires. Love is the bond between two people that is so strong that they cannot be seperated by poverty nor pain. The only thing that can shake a bond like love is when one of the people is changed greatly for the worse (drug addiction, alcoholism, etc.), and even then most bonds are not broken. Love is a connection between two people that is so deep and powerful that they cannot be seperated. It has nothing to do with physical attraction or greed, it has to do with finding a partner who so matches you that you are inseperable. Love is the intertwining of two people's souls, the connecting of the true essences of who they are. I have seen it happen often, but rarely is it seen in those petty relationships that depend on a single sentence or that are done out of physical attraction. Love can only happen when you find the right person. It may never happen for you. Mostly, dating is the search or physical attraction and short-term relationships to keep people feeling like they have found love when they have not. The proof of love is when you see a couple that is 90 years old and they are totally happy with each other, even if they have nearly nothing else in the world. Love is what makes old age the hope of many. The bond of love should last even when one of the two is dead. Possibly even when both are dead. If you listened to all that, good job.

04-23-2004, 10:39 PM	#5
SUSUGAM FFR Player Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 69	Hmm... should i bother getting into this? I guess so... personally... i feel like love is the meaning of life... or the best description of it... find your soulmate... and strive to be completely happy. Love to me is when you find the "prefect imperfection," that being out there that becomes your entire life focus. Sure... some say love is blind... and it sure as hell is. Im not sure if anyone can have proof that they are in love... but as far as they know... its fact. Love is the completion of soul... not just an intertwining, its like a covalent bond of souls sharing parts of each other souls with the other to make both of you whole. I see it as the ultimate emotion... And before you ask... I feel like I've found it, personally. Which I get more crap for than I can explain... but honestly i dont give a damn. I think everyone is capable of love, and many will find it. And if my "significant other was doused in gasoline and lit ablaze..." yes... I'd still love them. And could never imagine sharing the feeling for anyone else in life. When my love fades, as will my life. Because they are inter-dependant. Other than that... i can't explain anything but my own personal experience.

04-23-2004, 11:19 PM	#6
User6773 Guest Posts: n/a	Only self-pitying people would rather be dead than live without their loved one. Love is about connecting with someone else, not just base physical attraction. Love is never fragile - if what you have is fragile, it's not love.

04-23-2004, 11:22 PM	#7
SUSUGAM FFR Player Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 69	Fragile and LOVE do not go together, definately. I don't consider it self-pity... just a loss of the meaning of life... hence the end of it.

04-24-2004, 07:13 PM	#8
Tsuguri FFR Player Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Do the Bender dance! Hoo! Hah! Come on baby now Hoo! Hah! Come on, yeah! Posts: 108	Simply put, love is the greatest of gifts and the cruelest of curses, all rolled in to one nice little package. It is the beginning of too few lives and the ending of too many. Love is also, in my opinion, the single, most misinterpreted thing on earth, often having lust being mistaken for it.

04-24-2004, 07:24 PM	#10
Tsuguri FFR Player Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Do the Bender dance! Hoo! Hah! Come on baby now Hoo! Hah! Come on, yeah! Posts: 108	Entirely understandable. We've probably all been there. Hope you feel better now though.

04-25-2004, 02:55 AM	#13
Jam930 FFR Player Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 1,069	love is when two people care alot for the eachother's well being, and feel a connection with them. Spec do you love your mother? __________________ -Jamie

04-25-2004, 03:18 AM	#14
perfect_fat FFR Player Join Date: Mar 2004 Posts: 161	Love is a emotional reaction to a biological neccessity. Yeah, you guessed it, I'm a romantic.

04-25-2004, 05:59 AM	#15
Specforces Yes Join Date: Jan 2004 Age: 37 Posts: 5,028	Yeah Yeah, Love, whatever, I was pissed when I wrote that, don't take it literally, maybe I should have just listened to some Linkin Park. Specforces PS. I hate Linkin Park __________________ Check Out My Music

04-25-2004, 08:03 AM	#16
Jam930 FFR Player Join Date: Apr 2004 Posts: 1,069	were you pissed when u made your new sig? no offense. but u went from some nice complicated one, to some soldier screwed in the desert, to some kind of bat-skull-terminator devil surounded by explosions of poison. quite different from the cute little chibi specforces in your av. PS. Linkin park sux. __________________ -Jamie

04-25-2004, 08:07 AM	#17
RobbyZero FFR Player Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Canada Age: 36 Posts: 4,613	(What is love baby don't hurt me,dont hurt me no more ) Love that song :P Anyways... Love - What is it? I don't have the slightest clue

04-25-2004, 08:11 AM	#18
User6773 Guest Posts: n/a	Hahahaha Robby, I was actually thinking of the Haddaway song when I read the topic name.

04-25-2004, 08:15 AM	#19
RobbyZero FFR Player Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Canada Age: 36 Posts: 4,613	Good times... Night at the Roxbury ( one of the greatest movies )

04-25-2004, 07:18 PM	#20
Tsuguri FFR Player Join Date: Jan 2004 Location: Do the Bender dance! Hoo! Hah! Come on baby now Hoo! Hah! Come on, yeah! Posts: 108	SNL skits fo ever baby.

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)