What to do?

rockinwithkiss · 08-5-2005, 03:12 PM

Okay, my boyfriend came over Sunday and was all nice and sweet and nothing bad happened the entire day. He calls me 2 days later and we have a good chat and he and I talk about doing something Saturday. We are a long distance relationship...or I should say we were. I got an email from him on Thursday...well I guess that's yesterday...saying that he wanted to break up with me. Now, naturally I'm thinking, "Wait a minute, we never ever fought and nothing ever seemed to be wrong." I, of course, don't want to break up, but he doesn't either (allegedly), he just can't handle the idea of me being so far away. I don't know whether to pursue trying to win him back or just be friends with him. It's all so depressing and sad.

Tps222 · 08-5-2005, 03:16 PM

I doubt posting this here will be any help to you, as the past ones weren't. I don't see much you can do at the moment. If he doesn't want to wait for you, then he's not worth it? Sorry I wasn't much help.

MalReynolds · 08-5-2005, 03:17 PM

Find someone closer. He broke it off, the obligation on your end is done. If he still wants to call, let him. If he doesn't, don't push him. Don't try to force him to come back to you; that will just push him further away. Distance makes the heart grow fond, but there's a limit.

Mal

rockinwithkiss · 08-5-2005, 03:22 PM

You're probably right, but it's very hard because I had no idea whatsoever that he didn't want to be with me anymore. It's like he told me he loved me one day, then the next day he broke up with me.

MalReynolds · 08-5-2005, 03:25 PM

That's how these things happen sometimes. He still cares for how you feel, he just doesn't want to be involved anymore over such a distance.

Mal

Tps222 · 08-5-2005, 03:37 PM

It probably sucks for him because he can't hang out with any girls around him or you, so he's bored.

Linkisdoomed · 08-5-2005, 03:45 PM

Lol, he has another girlfriend I'd bet. That's why he wanted to break.

-Mr. 1up-

**Snapps** · 08-5-2005, 03:50 PM

It isn't going to be a relationship that will last for the rest of your life.

You would have had to deal with this sooner or later.

Mal pretty much summed up what I was going to say though, so no need for me to keep going.

Quote:

It probably sucks for him because he can't hang out with any girls around him or you, so he's bored.

I don't understand what you are saying. Are you saying he was bored for the fact he couldn't hang around girls when he was in a long distance relationship? I think if a person is so bogus enough for them to think that they are the only opposite sexed person their bf/gf can talk to or hang out with, they are too into their relationship and needs to calm the heck down.

rockinwithkiss · 08-5-2005, 03:54 PM

I would never have said that he couldn't hang out with a friend just because she was a girl. Especially since almost all of my friends are guys. I wouldn't limit him.

GuidoHunter · 08-5-2005, 04:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rockinwithkiss

he just can't handle the idea of me being so far away.

Why not? Long-distance relationships aren't that hard to work out.

--Guido

http://andy.mikee385.com

rockinwithkiss · 08-5-2005, 04:05 PM

He told me he doesn't have what it takes.

GuidoHunter · 08-5-2005, 04:11 PM

Then he's not worth it. He sounds like a tool to me.

--Guido

http://andy.mikee385.com

rockinwithkiss · 08-5-2005, 04:14 PM

For the life of me though, I can't say that I don't still love him because I do. Breakups are way too confusing. I think I'm off guys for a little while.

**stretchypanda** · 08-5-2005, 05:20 PM

Long distance relationships are very hard when there's absolutely no opportunity to see the other person. I'm assuming you're both young, too young to be traveling the country (or state or.. whatever) to see each other. Guido says they're not hard, but we're also twenty, and seeing each other was a three-hour drive last year, and is now and hour and a half. But I was in a relationship with a guy back in my hometown when I started college and, even if he hadn't been a total jackass, the five-hour distance definitely put a lot of strain on us.

You have to have a certain level of maturity to handle being in a relationship with someone who lives far away. I don't think loving and caring for that person is enough.

You should at least see if the two of you can keep in touch, and if he's the one for you, maybe when you're older circumstances will make things a little more possible sometime down the road.

ToshX · 08-5-2005, 05:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Linkisdoomed

Lol, he has another girlfriend I'd bet. That's why he wanted to break.

-Mr. 1up-

Do you know how wrong it is to say that to someone?

XDDRCutieX · 08-5-2005, 05:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rockinwithkiss

It's like he told me he loved me one day, then the next day he broke up with me.

That happened to me. One day he said "I love you Rachel." The next day we broke up. ='( Sorry to hear about what happened to you. Remember this one thing though, "The guy worth crying over will never make you cry." Hope everything is okay with you. If you need someone to talk to, PM me. =D

~Rach~

08-5-2005, 03:12 PM	#1
rockinwithkiss FFR Player Join Date: May 2005 Location: a padded room Posts: 21	What to do? Okay, my boyfriend came over Sunday and was all nice and sweet and nothing bad happened the entire day. He calls me 2 days later and we have a good chat and he and I talk about doing something Saturday. We are a long distance relationship...or I should say we were. I got an email from him on Thursday...well I guess that's yesterday...saying that he wanted to break up with me. Now, naturally I'm thinking, "Wait a minute, we never ever fought and nothing ever seemed to be wrong." I, of course, don't want to break up, but he doesn't either (allegedly), he just can't handle the idea of me being so far away. I don't know whether to pursue trying to win him back or just be friends with him. It's all so depressing and sad. __________________ I love going to the elementary school, watching all the kids jump and shout, but they don\'t know I\'m using blanks. ~Jack Handey 98% of American teens use or have tried pot. If you are part of the 2% that hasn\'t, put this in your profile.

08-5-2005, 03:16 PM	#2
Tps222 FFR Player Join Date: Nov 2004 Age: 33 Posts: 6,167	RE: What to do? I doubt posting this here will be any help to you, as the past ones weren't. I don't see much you can do at the moment. If he doesn't want to wait for you, then he's not worth it? Sorry I wasn't much help.

08-5-2005, 03:17 PM	#3
MalReynolds CHOCK FULL O' NUTRIENTS Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: A Denny's Bathroom. Age: 36 Posts: 6,571	RE: What to do? Find someone closer. He broke it off, the obligation on your end is done. If he still wants to call, let him. If he doesn't, don't push him. Don't try to force him to come back to you; that will just push him further away. Distance makes the heart grow fond, but there's a limit. Mal __________________ "A new take on the epic fantasy genre... Darkly comic, relatable characters... twisted storyline." "Readers who prefer tension and romance, Maledictions: The Offering, delivers... As serious YA fiction, I’ll give it five stars out of five. As a novel? Four and a half." - Liz Ellor My new novel: Maledictions: The Offering. Now in Paperback!

08-5-2005, 03:22 PM	#4
rockinwithkiss FFR Player Join Date: May 2005 Location: a padded room Posts: 21	RE: What to do? You're probably right, but it's very hard because I had no idea whatsoever that he didn't want to be with me anymore. It's like he told me he loved me one day, then the next day he broke up with me. __________________ I love going to the elementary school, watching all the kids jump and shout, but they don\'t know I\'m using blanks. ~Jack Handey 98% of American teens use or have tried pot. If you are part of the 2% that hasn\'t, put this in your profile.

08-5-2005, 03:25 PM	#5
MalReynolds CHOCK FULL O' NUTRIENTS Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: A Denny's Bathroom. Age: 36 Posts: 6,571	RE: What to do? That's how these things happen sometimes. He still cares for how you feel, he just doesn't want to be involved anymore over such a distance. Mal __________________ "A new take on the epic fantasy genre... Darkly comic, relatable characters... twisted storyline." "Readers who prefer tension and romance, Maledictions: The Offering, delivers... As serious YA fiction, I’ll give it five stars out of five. As a novel? Four and a half." - Liz Ellor My new novel: Maledictions: The Offering. Now in Paperback!

08-5-2005, 03:37 PM	#6
Tps222 FFR Player Join Date: Nov 2004 Age: 33 Posts: 6,167	RE: What to do? It probably sucks for him because he can't hang out with any girls around him or you, so he's bored.

08-5-2005, 03:45 PM	#7
Linkisdoomed FFR Player Join Date: May 2004 Location: Where empty thoughts die. Age: 34 Posts: 594	RE: What to do? Lol, he has another girlfriend I'd bet. That's why he wanted to break. -Mr. 1up- __________________ R^3 Skin God R^3 Engine Skin Curator

08-5-2005, 03:54 PM	#9
rockinwithkiss FFR Player Join Date: May 2005 Location: a padded room Posts: 21	RE: What to do? I would never have said that he couldn't hang out with a friend just because she was a girl. Especially since almost all of my friends are guys. I wouldn't limit him. __________________ I love going to the elementary school, watching all the kids jump and shout, but they don\'t know I\'m using blanks. ~Jack Handey 98% of American teens use or have tried pot. If you are part of the 2% that hasn\'t, put this in your profile.

08-5-2005, 04:05 PM	#11
rockinwithkiss FFR Player Join Date: May 2005 Location: a padded room Posts: 21	RE: Re: What to do? He told me he doesn't have what it takes. __________________ I love going to the elementary school, watching all the kids jump and shout, but they don\'t know I\'m using blanks. ~Jack Handey 98% of American teens use or have tried pot. If you are part of the 2% that hasn\'t, put this in your profile.

08-5-2005, 04:14 PM	#13
rockinwithkiss FFR Player Join Date: May 2005 Location: a padded room Posts: 21	RE: Re: What to do? For the life of me though, I can't say that I don't still love him because I do. Breakups are way too confusing. I think I'm off guys for a little while. __________________ I love going to the elementary school, watching all the kids jump and shout, but they don\'t know I\'m using blanks. ~Jack Handey 98% of American teens use or have tried pot. If you are part of the 2% that hasn\'t, put this in your profile.

08-5-2005, 05:20 PM	#14
stretchypanda shock me shock me Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: Texas Age: 39 Posts: 4,123	RE: Re: What to do? Long distance relationships are very hard when there's absolutely no opportunity to see the other person. I'm assuming you're both young, too young to be traveling the country (or state or.. whatever) to see each other. Guido says they're not hard, but we're also twenty, and seeing each other was a three-hour drive last year, and is now and hour and a half. But I was in a relationship with a guy back in my hometown when I started college and, even if he hadn't been a total jackass, the five-hour distance definitely put a lot of strain on us. You have to have a certain level of maturity to handle being in a relationship with someone who lives far away. I don't think loving and caring for that person is enough. You should at least see if the two of you can keep in touch, and if he's the one for you, maybe when you're older circumstances will make things a little more possible sometime down the road.

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