AIM Away Messages

deltro300111 · 01-21-2005, 10:20 PM

Post your best!

"I'm asleep, or dead- whichever comforts you more."

tsutter · 01-21-2005, 10:23 PM

I usually use good ol' "asdf".

deltro300111 · 01-21-2005, 10:25 PM

Wow, that's informative, and witty. XD, Not to mention original ^_^

**talisman** · 01-21-2005, 10:29 PM

"zug zug"

Pooping_Panda · 01-21-2005, 10:35 PM

"Droppin' a Deuce" XD

**nickadeemus** · 01-21-2005, 10:37 PM

Nick isn't here. Nick went away. Nick's gone.

whorlichan · 01-21-2005, 10:40 PM

This is my favorite one, that doesn't actually say where I am or what I'm doing:

Real Men of Genius. Today we salute you, Mr. Compulsive Away Message Checker. While most people are out actually having a fun life, you are at home reading about it on your computer screen. Right mouse click, Get Buddy Info, or the little Info box at the bottom of the Buddy List. You have people on that list you haven't talked to in years, but you still loyally read their away messages every day to see what they're up to. So, crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Marauder of the Mousepad, and don't wander too far from your computer because you never know when someone's away message may change.

**Squeek** · 01-21-2005, 10:43 PM

I have no really good away messages, but I do enjoy my profile.

"I have a profile."

~Squeek

JurseyRider734 · 01-21-2005, 10:54 PM

My favorite away message is "deltro300111 sucks at life"

deltro300111 · 01-21-2005, 11:04 PM

"Jurs- ender of posts"

LOCK ME!!!

**Rebirth0** · 01-21-2005, 11:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JurseyRider734

My favorite away message is "deltro300111 sucks at life"

You guys are still fighting? XD

My favorite one is probably this: Playing video games....you better not whore me with IMs to get me to come back faster, I'll probably not even hear the sounds from the IMs. AW FUCK! You screwed me up, jackass. LEAVE UNTIL I COME BACK.

I don't use it anymore though. And no, its not supposed to be funny.

JurseyRider734 · 01-21-2005, 11:22 PM

That was the most retarded thing i've ever heard in my entire life. Please die.

**Rebirth0** · 01-21-2005, 11:25 PM

www.jurseyriderwins.com/owned/deltro300111

GuidoHunter · 01-21-2005, 11:35 PM

"God, I wish I had a pop-tart right now. Mmmmm...a sexy, frosted strawberry pop-tart. Augh, I can just feel that luscious filling warming my mouth and making my loins burn with excitement! If only I had that delicious fruit filling right now to rub all over my chest...and abdomen....and down.....down......down....... The
strawberry, the most sensual fruit. The anxiety of waiting wells up inside of me, drawing from every part of my being and condensing into a raging ball of desire! How much longer will it take? I want it now, all hot and juicy, but still it must get warmer and warmer, until-- There it is! It shoots into the air! The toaster expels it with great force from its raging insides, and cools... relaxes. I collapse to the floor with a smile on my face. Alas, this pop-tart will not be eaten, for now I am spent."

My first real attempt at metaphor. Now I just have to work on subtlety.

For when I'm playing Goa:

"What's my new destination? That's right, it's the Spice islands. Puerto Rico has been sufficiently colonized, and now my country has decided to take advantage of the rich spice islands. ::cracks knuckles:: If you'll excuse me, I have colonists to tax and exploit, missions to build, expeditions to fulfill, and rivals to beat, all for my glorious country!"

"Poetry is like a pile of burning humans on a sacrificial pyre. It's as revolting to the ears as the stench of charring skin is to the nose. The words of a poem rip through your skull like the pungent odor of scorching flesh and the screams of the innocent."

For when I'm napping:

"Ha! I laugh in the face of all forces whose sole purpose is to keep me from napping at this very moment. They underestimated my resolve, and for that they shall be shamed and humiliated every second that they gaze upon my unconscious body. Alas, their cause was a doomed one, but this shall be a lesson to all in the future, for many have the desire, but none have the strength."

Whenever I'm hating the fuck out of Bill or when I remember that my friend Daniel is hilarious:

"'I was looking at a map the other day, and Connecticut really sucks.'"

"Charlie was a chemist, but Charlie is no more. What Charlie thought was H2O was H2SO4."

I also have a bunch of those deals about Texas colleges, but I won't post them, since they're long and most people wouldn't get the jokes. I have others, but most of them are links and song lyrics (Komm Susser Tod owns all). All the long ones were written by me and only me.

--Guido

http://andy.mikee385.com

ThEclipse · 01-22-2005, 12:02 AM

"I am away from my computer right now."

THREAD OVER

GuidoHunter · 01-22-2005, 12:04 AM

People who use the default away message lose..and make me cry..and suck at life.

COUGHLDCOUGH

--Guido

http://andy.mikee385.com

Anticrombie0909 · 01-22-2005, 12:09 AM

Favorites:

"I'm looking for myself. If I get back before I return, keep me here."
"Just because you're paranoid, don't mean they're not after you" (+major prop points to whoever can identify that first)

And my personal favorite:
"Somewhere in Texas, a village is missing its idiot."

ad0gg · 01-22-2005, 05:37 AM

"asdf"

"blah"

" "

"<insert witty comment here>"

flypie743 · 01-22-2005, 06:11 AM

I like this one a lot. It took ages to think of and I don't think any other away message will ever match this creativity.

"Shower."

Afrobean · 01-22-2005, 06:28 AM

I've stolen a few from in real life friends*. One of the best is this:

Quote:

I'm white and I'm gonna keep it that way by hopping in the shower.

Thanks, Penis.

I don't use it often, because if I'm showering, I already put up an away for another reason, or my simple away that I stole from the same friend:

Quote:

away

I suppose I'm most proud of my away message I made in a few minutes when I was going to go to Benihana.

Quote:

Went to Benihana... oops...

Hopefully, you can all get that joke.

*Both of the aways listed there were stolen from a friend who I call Penis.

01-21-2005, 10:20 PM	#1
deltro300111 FFR Player Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: d colon Age: 34 Posts: 1,014	AIM Away Messages Post your best! "I'm asleep, or dead- whichever comforts you more." __________________

01-21-2005, 10:23 PM	#2
tsutter FFR Player Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Indianapolis, IN Posts: 2,370	RE: AIM Away Messages I usually use good ol' "asdf". __________________ [02:02:16] <Hayden> i carry the plastic i make it spastic when i put it in ya moms ass boy her ** is elastic when im finished in knee that slut in the jaw snap her back in to pieces i lay down the law cuz i gots no respect fo that * elixers seeing as he got double dick **ed on dust 2 by an ingram at long A in pit

01-21-2005, 10:25 PM	#3
deltro300111 FFR Player Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: d colon Age: 34 Posts: 1,014	Wow, that's informative, and witty. XD, Not to mention original ^_^ __________________

01-21-2005, 10:37 PM	#6
nickadeemus The spice must flow. Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: In the aeroplane over the sea Posts: 807	Nick isn't here. Nick went away. Nick's gone. __________________ Nice.

01-21-2005, 10:40 PM	#7
whorlichan Tiny Plastic Meat Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: The Valley, Los Angeles Age: 40 Posts: 669	This is my favorite one, that doesn't actually say where I am or what I'm doing: Real Men of Genius. Today we salute you, Mr. Compulsive Away Message Checker. While most people are out actually having a fun life, you are at home reading about it on your computer screen. Right mouse click, Get Buddy Info, or the little Info box at the bottom of the Buddy List. You have people on that list you haven't talked to in years, but you still loyally read their away messages every day to see what they're up to. So, crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Marauder of the Mousepad, and don't wander too far from your computer because you never know when someone's away message may change. __________________ Goddess of Chocolate Sauce First ever graduate of the Quetzacoatino Academy for Aspiring Deities My lame LJ My friend Cassie's amazing photography

01-21-2005, 10:29 PM	#4
talisman Resident Penguin Join Date: May 2003 Age: 37 Posts: 4,598	"zug zug"

01-21-2005, 10:35 PM	#5
Pooping_Panda FFR Player Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: illinizzle Posts: 1,773	"Droppin' a Deuce" XD

01-21-2005, 10:43 PM	#8
Squeek let it snow~ Join Date: Jan 2004 Age: 37 Posts: 14,444	I have no really good away messages, but I do enjoy my profile. "I have a profile." ~Squeek

01-21-2005, 11:04 PM	#10
deltro300111 FFR Player Join Date: Aug 2003 Location: d colon Age: 34 Posts: 1,014	"Jurs- ender of posts" LOCK ME!!! __________________

01-21-2005, 11:25 PM	#13
Rebirth0 FFR Originalbro Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Kansas City, Missouri Age: 33 Posts: 8,750	www.jurseyriderwins.com/owned/deltro300111

01-22-2005, 12:02 AM	#15
ThEclipse FFR Player Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: i did it all for the nookie Posts: 1,641	"I am away from my computer right now." THREAD OVER

01-22-2005, 12:09 AM	#17
Anticrombie0909 FFR Player Join Date: Jul 2003 Posts: 4,683	Favorites: "I'm looking for myself. If I get back before I return, keep me here." "Just because you're paranoid, don't mean they're not after you" (+major prop points to whoever can identify that first) And my personal favorite: "Somewhere in Texas, a village is missing its idiot."

01-22-2005, 05:37 AM	#18
ad0gg FFR Player Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: At My House Posts: 989	"asdf" "blah" " " "<insert witty comment here>" __________________

01-22-2005, 06:11 AM	#19
flypie743 FFR Player Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: fairyland Posts: 3,210	I like this one a lot. It took ages to think of and I don't think any other away message will ever match this creativity. "Shower." __________________ IF YOU ARE THE BOMB YOU WILL CLICK THIS and if you dont, you suck.

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