Leaving FFR for a while

[Kekeb]

consequentialism da thread

[L.B.D.D]

rubix automatically going into

The Debate Mode

look mr. reincarnate-i needaUse Logic al time

where in my posts do you see "ya his dad is 100% entitled to shoot ur stuff becus u played games", they both fucked up and im sayin it's come too far so he betta Move OuT

[korny]

You act as if your post didn't have a tone of rationalization to it on riots dad's behalf in relation to how much he may or may not be contributing to the house which is completely irrelevant to what riots dad actually ended up doing because it was in no way justified

[Pseudo Enigma]

Originally Posted by korny

You act as if your post didn't have a tone of rationalization to it on riots dad's behalf in relation to how much he may or may not be contributing to the house which is completely irrelevant to what riots dad actually ended up doing because it was in no way justified

punctuation count: 0

[ilikexd]

Originally Posted by Pseudo Enigma

punctuation count: 0

implying that sentence is any missing punctuation marks

[choof]

Originally Posted by ilikexd

implying that sentence is any missing punctuation marks

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>

[choof]

hey fgt I'm the only dude who can take dumb shots at korny

[Pseudo Enigma]

Originally Posted by choof

hey fgt I'm the only dude who can take dumb shots at korny

dumb shot for a dumb thread zzz

[Charu]

[kjwkjw]

[leonid]

Play some better games

[Cavernio]

I'm right there with Dev, you should not be in that situation riotpolice.

Riopolice has actually done nothing wrong, that's the thing. Not obeying your parents' rules when you're 20 and you live with them, isn't doing something wrong when their rules don't revolve around a properly functioning household but revolve around trying to control you. 20 is a not a child, nor even borderline a child. It's 100% not acceptable for a parent of a 20 year old to be trying to change their kid's behaviour by treating them like they're 6. My mom tried to pull shit like that with me, and I gladly chose to lose financial support.

It's on the parents to not support their kids if, as adults, they are too much a burden on them. It's on the parents to set good examples and be able to talk reasonably with their GROWN children.

And then there's ALSO the fact that a firearm were discharged to make a point...ummm...yeah. Guess what? As an adult, you are free to not put up with this shit. Don't forget it.

[korny]

Originally Posted by Cavernio

I'm right there with Dev, you should not be in that situation riotpolice.

Riopolice has actually done nothing wrong, that's the thing. Not obeying your parents' rules when you're 20 and you live with them, isn't doing something wrong when their rules don't revolve around a properly functioning household but revolve around trying to control you. 20 is a not a child, nor even borderline a child. It's 100% not acceptable for a parent of a 20 year old to be trying to change their kid's behaviour by treating them like they're 6. My mom tried to pull shit like that with me, and I gladly chose to lose financial support.

It's on the parents to not support their kids if, as adults, they are too much a burden on them. It's on the parents to set good examples and be able to talk reasonably with their GROWN children.

And then there's ALSO the fact that a firearm were discharged to make a point...ummm...yeah. Guess what? As an adult, you are free to not put up with this shit. Don't forget it.

Are you serious right now

His age at this point doesn't matter -at all- because he IS 20. ITS THEIR HOUSE that he lives in AS an adult by quite honestly, their good will. The environment in which they seek and strive to maintain is a freedom they are completely entitled to, and if they feel like it's not up to their standard it is completely o.k. for them to enforce that, even if it isn't founded in reality, and so long as it doesn't conflict with someone's safety.

No ones arguing against the fact that there is a serious communication issue in this house, but that's irrelevant because communication doesn't seem to matter here with someone like riots dad. It's his way or the highway, so deal with it, or figure something out.

Obviously the manner in which that has been enforced in this case is unacceptable, but I think you're failing to put into perspective how the parent feels, who especially isn't so generationally inclined so to speak. From a loving parents perspective who wants to see their progeny optimize their time in order to "be the best they can be" -while- being in their house, they may find difficulty and conflictions with the thought that, A. I don't see the benefit in you using your time this way when your goals to succeed appear to be this and B. I don't want to make my child have to go through he struggle of making it on your own, but I do want to make it clear that I expect certain things while you are living here without financial obligations due to our goodwill to provide this convenience.

If you know the people whether they be family or friends are prone to irrational behavior, and you want to live your life the way you see fit knowing it will conflict with the standard of the house you're currently living in, do something about it.

[Cavernio]

Originally Posted by korny

Are you serious right now

His age at this point doesn't matter -at all- because he IS 20. ITS THEIR HOUSE that he lives in AS an adult by quite honestly, their good will. The environment in which they seek and strive to maintain is a freedom they are completely entitled to, and if they feel like it's not up to their standard it is completely o.k. for them to enforce that, even if it isn't founded in reality, and so long as it doesn't conflict with someone's safety.

It's not OK for someone to strongarm someone into behaving the way they want them to. It's sickening. It was disgusting when my mom tried to do it to me ('he who pays the piper calls the tune') because it IS a parent/child relationship. Because most of the child's life the parent HAS been in a position to control their child, and rightly so...when they're a kid.

I mean, no one would settle for a landlord acting like this (or at least I hope I would think they wouldn't), so what's the difference between this and a parent? Just because the parent is being generous (and I know and see that it IS a generosity) to allow their grown child to live at home, it doesn't then make it right, in the least, to dangle that above someone's head.

Furthermore, if you've reigned with an iron fist over your children into their adulthood, if there has been abuse or manipulation, then there becomes a fucked up situation where the progeny will still defer to their parents out of the progeny still FEELING like a child when their parents are involved, and the parent, in that situation, is partially to blame. And that's just not a healthy relationship.
(I suppose though, this is very, very much me touting North American ideals of freedom and independence though...most other cultures seem to have strongly knit family ties where children will defer to their parents right up to their deathbed and to do otherwise is scandalous.)

Originally Posted by korny

From a loving parents perspective who wants to see their progeny optimize their time in order to "be the best they can be" -while- being in their house, they may find difficulty and conflictions with the thought that, A. I don't see the benefit in you using your time this way when your goals to succeed appear to be this and B. I don't want to make my child have to go through he struggle of making it on your own, but I do want to make it clear that I expect certain things while you are living here without financial obligations due to our goodwill to provide this convenience.

If you know the people whether they be family or friends are prone to irrational behavior, and you want to live your life the way you see fit knowing it will conflict with the standard of the house you're currently living in, do something about it.

But if the situation is such that the parent is actively abusive and manipulative, you're now victim blaming. And sure, if the victim is strong enough to leave the situation, good on them.

Of course, you'll note this IS my advice to riotpolice...just leave.

Like, it's wholeheartedly fucked up to defend someone who is actively trying to manipulate someone just because there's a degree of love. To take this to a ludicrous extreme to convey my point, what if he were actively telling his kid to, oh, offer sexual favors to get better grades and get a good job. His dad's just looking out for his kid, right? The dad perceives that this is in his kid's best interest, that this will help him immensely through life, etc. Does this not make the idea of dangling room and board over your child's head, threatening them with taking something away because they aren't using their sexual prowess enough to get ahead in life, rather disgusting? I hope it does, because if so then it invalidates the point of 'well, the dad has good intentions and just wants what's best' and 'look how generous his dad is being' and 'his dad's within his rights'.

No, his dad's NOT within his rights. And that it comes from a loved one, it makes it worse because even if he is 20, he's still going to love and care about his dad, he still probably respects him, he's capable of seeing that his dad is being this way out of love, and he still had, for most of his life, a relationship with his dad where his dad, rightfully, had all the power. So no, it's not like he's suddenly 20 and is now immune to manipulation. It's called manipulation for a reason, and he's being manipulated right now. To have the attitude that so many have of 'dude respect your dad' is just mind-boggling to me.

[rushyrulz]

Let's just keep in mind that riot is 20 years old (maybe early 20 now?), in college for an IS&T Degree and his dad is on his ass for being on the computer.

Can I just..

Riot isn't a bad-tempered person. He has always been pretty chill and I don't think I've ever seen him lose his temper in the idk fuckin 5 years I've known him. I consider myself to be his closest friend on FFR and I've heard all his horror stories. His parents are truly psycho, like objectively, so all the argumentation on their behalf can probably stop. What the hell are you supposed to do when your parents are throwing down rules to stay off the computer when being on the computer is in your line of study? He's told me that he has been scolded for being on the computer when he's not even playing games.

His parents are divorced and in opposite parts of the country, so there's trouble in paradise already. His dad hasn't re-married (which is usually an indicator of being a shitty human being, especially when you claim yourself to be a "real man"). His father obviously has some type of agenda against technology and is letting it show, drastically, with his 'look at how manly and dominant I am, I'm gonna shoot your possessions with a .22' attitude. At least get a real gun L0L

Regarding the, "Get a full time job and move out" argument, he's trying like the rest of us who are in college. Sure he could go out and get a job at a furniture store or something right now and probably afford a shitty one-bedroom apartment, but who wants that life? He's almost done with his associate's degree, and he can definitely go from there.. but I don't see him dropping everything and applying at KFC as a plausible outcome of this.

[rushyrulz]

Your ideals are fine, korny. In this specific instance though, the rules are irrational and the consequences are over the top.

Originally Posted by korny

Are you serious right now

btw, you know this makes your post look like shit right?

[korny]

Originally Posted by rushyrulz

Your ideals are fine, korny. In this specific instance though, the rules are irrational and the consequences are over the top.

Except the rules don't matter. As long as they don't jeopardize his safety, he is living there by their good will. If there is an inability to communicate your perspective, then your options are pretty much laid out in front of you.

[r]

Don't turn into a rotting hunk of meat.

[rushyrulz]

Yeah, it's kind of a shitty situation and I feel sorry for people who are in it.

[welsh_girl]

Good luck m8