Need some advice. (Not relationship advice. Promise.)

[dietsnapple135]

So, I have a problem, and would like some suggestions as to another way to go about it than what I do.

My friends and I have a little get-together every Monday and Wednesday for a friendly game of ultimate frisbee at a near park. It's been happening for about 3 months or so and has been going swimmingly. It's about 15 or so friends that just play around and we bring our own friends, no real rules about who can come. So, this one kid, one I've known for a long time but haven't ever liked, comes one day and absolutely spoils the fun. The kid is ridiculously competitive and yells and screams whenever the other team scores a point. He bent back two girls' fingernails in one game and threatened to physically beat me after I scored a point and did a friendly frisbee-spike.

So, my solution to this kid and him ruining all my damn frisbee fun is simply not going. I'm not a violent person and I avoid conflict at all costs. So, as of now I'm not going on our jolly get-together and I'm probably missing, a lot of people are starting to quit for the same reason and I don't think my solution is a proper one. Suggestions?

Go Forum!

[lumphoboextreme]

ok, yeah our football games were the same way, were competitive and all but when these two kids crossed the line and started to deliberately try to hurt kids and one kid broke his wrist the 10-12 or so of us came together and just decided as a group not to invite the other two kids anymore, problem solved and we play football again almost once a week

[flipsta_lombax]

Why don't you just tell the kid to buzz off? And if he loses it, show him who's right. Yes, you have to confront him in some way. Just leaving off will make you the weak one.

[dietsnapple135]

Well, I'd love to try to arrange him not being invited but.
A. He's a ruthless bastard and really doesn't care.
B. Everyone else there is really nice and isn't about to ask him not to show up(nor will I).

I feel maybe if he gets a tad more ridiculous people will be outraged enough to make him leave or brutally pound him into the ground.

[Mr. Bob]

just say its cancelled and go somewhere else where he wont know where to find you rofl

[Xx{Midnight}xX]

Why don't you just tell the kid to buzz off? And if he loses it, show him who's right. Yes, you have to confront him in some way. Just leaving off will make you the weak one.

Agreed. But make sure not to be a jerk about doing this.

[dietsnapple135]

Why don't you just tell the kid to buzz off? And if he loses it, show him who's right. Yes, you have to confront him in some way. Just leaving off will make you the weak one.

I mean, I'd like to, but I don't really want to cause a problem. The whole issue is more of an underlying thing and I don't want to make things more awkward than need be. A few of the members like him too(somehow), so I don't think I can get everyone to tell him we're not doing it anymore. Sigh. Frisbee isn't that fun anyways.

[OnixRose]

a falcon punch and a good long look at your avie should get him to leave you alone

[MYZZ]

If this guy sounds as bad as you make him, I'm sure you and the group will agree to simply ask him to leave these gatherings .. or just tell him to layoff the hostile playing and give him another chance.

[clarinet89]

To go off of what MYZZ was talking about, why don't you all get together and discuss it, then you could have a little intervention and give him an ultimatum: either he calms down because its only a friendly game, or tell him not to come anymore. Having everyone there to support each other will help your confidence.

[Crashfan3]

Tell that kid to either get some Ritalin or buzz off, he doesn't need to be acting like that in public.
I used to be like that when I was in middle school, and that's exactly what my friends told me, and it worked.

[infinity.]

i've been in many situations like this,
dont tell him to leave, just make him feel bad about his actions, because usually the kids that are competitive are kids that have nothing else going for them (possibly not even that.)

the way i went about doing that would be questions or commands such as:

Do you ever shut up?
You know no one here likes you, right?
Why do you always have to whine when something doesnt go your way?
etc

there's times to be nice and times to not, man. usually the overly-competitive people are a bit hypersensitive or whatever, and when saying stuff like that, they get sad and shut up for the rest of the day. but it usually doesnt last more than a day

[moches]

i've been in many situations like this,
dont tell him to leave, just make him feel bad about his actions, because usually the kids that are competitive are kids that have nothing else going for them (possibly not even that.)

the way i went about doing that would be questions or commands such as:

Do you ever shut up?
You know no one here likes you, right?
Why do you always have to whine when something doesnt go your way?
etc

there's times to be nice and times to not, man. usually the overly-competitive people are a bit hypersensitive or whatever, and when saying stuff like that, they get sad and shut up for the rest of the day. but it usually doesnt last more than a day

Really? Usually, it results in the kid getting an even more inflated ego than before.

I'd go with what clarinet89 says: give him an ultimatum. It's your frisbee game and you don't need to put up with this.

[L0NEvvolf]

Go to a diffrent park with you're friends, and be sure not to tell him.

[H3llacious]

Find a different location. See if there is another ultimate Frisbee park in the area. Or just don't go for the entire week and resume the following week.

edit: ninja'd damn it.

edit2: Ask him to chill out and stop screaming and yelling. And if he starts beating an you like uber beating on you, have him be arrested for assault. That will get him away for a while.

[who_cares973]

confrontation is going to happen either way so just tell him to **** off

[blindreper1179]

don't throw him the frisbee.

[L0NEvvolf]

Good idea. If he is one place on the field throw it the complete oposite direction, even if it mean that you won't have fun for one day because you all do so terrible, then he will quit and you can play by yourselves.