What do you think is wrong with you?

[Pseudo Enigma]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

Ugh don't get me started. Inb4 huge wall

Body:
- I twitch uncontrollably. I'm not sure whether to call it a twitch or not, but it's definitely not a controllable action. Basically if I'm aware that I'm sitting still, my body will just flinch every few seconds without reason. My head will twitch if I'm lying on a pillow etc.
- I'm pretty sure I don't have good hearing, and it's not something I did to myself, I think. It worries me
- My body produces way too much earwax. I find myself digging it out at least once a day.
- My pinky toes are fucking small, they are about a centimeter and a half long. The toenails are about 6 millimeters wide.
- I sleep at weird hours. If I have enough time away from commitments such as school, my natural sleep pattern kicks in and I find myself sleeping from 8AM to 6-8PM.
- My face has a streak of acne across the nose, in a blatant red rash. I dunno if it's cute or not, but I definitely don't like looking at it.
- I can't get rid of the bags under my eyes even if I sleep properly for a month.
- My appetite is too big and refreshes too often for me to keep up.
- I can't gain weight and I'm pretty sure I'm under 100LBs (5'5"?)
- My mouth wont form words properly.

Mind/Personality:
- I always second guess myself. This almost always makes me make a wrong decision which would've been right if I didn't hesitate.
- I always feel awkward around people and I feel like I shouldn't be there.
- I can never put things into words exactly the way I want to put them when I'm speaking irl
- I think people hate me when they don't.
- I get into this state of mind where I feel like nothing is worth anything at all. Nothing has value because everything always comes back to the fact that after you die, there's nothing. If you lose everything in the end, what's the point in trying at all.
- I'm able to listen to highly repetitive music for hours without feeling annoyed or bothered by it. EG. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wp3rzAdwT8
- I feel annoyed by my artistic taste. I can never actually pronounce it properly, and I have a quirk that just makes it fail a lot of the time.
- Even if I know I'm being annoying or disruptive, sometimes I have a hard time restraining myself.
- If nobody was around to hear, I would probably be screaming half the time. I always have an urge to just scream for no reason.
- I can't control my temper, and it often controls me.
- The amount of restraint I have from saying stupid shit is too damn high. I hate that I have those thoughts in the first place.
- I take things extremely personally for no reason
- I'm melodramatic.
- I always make things about me, even when they're not.
- I actually try really hard to be a nice person. I shouldn't have to try at all, and that bothers me.
- I find it weird that almost all the people I make friends with are women or men who aren't masculine.
- I resist the urge to restyle myself so often. For example, I'd probably make a new profile for myself every week if I had the dedication or time.
- I'm probably a narcissist. I find myself looking at my reflection too often lately.
- If I'm learning about something in school, I'm always challenging it and subconsciously telling myself it's not true. I don't know when this started, but I feel like I'm not learning properly because I can't accept it.
- I take note of my surroundings into great detail, only to forget it after I leave. I will actually read everything on the walls, take note of how the bricks are laid out. Everything.
- I can't go near bridges or ledges without feeling like if I wasn't focused on thinking about not jumping off that I would.
- When I'm speaking my word order always gets changed up, or letters. It's almost like verbal dyslexia. A couple examples: lapping cloudly (clapping loudly), I ate breakfast for rice. (I ate rice for breakfast.)

- I feel like I can't think straight anymore and that I'm slowly going insane.

[JohnRedWolf87]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

-I'm overweight. Not grotesquely so, but still.
-Although I'm not ugly, and might be a little on the cute/handsome side (from what people have told me), I'm still pretty average-looking and definitely won't turn any heads.
-Socially awkward
-Easily anxious/nervous.
-No ambition, at least where it matters. I'd be fine working at the same job all my life, as long as I enjoyed it and the pay was good. I could care less about moving up in the company or making my mark on the world.
-The things I'm passionate about are hobbies that have little or no productive value. If I had enough money, I'd just retire and spend my free time doing useless but fun shit.
-I have a speech impediment, which causes me to stutter. It's not as bad as it was, but it still surfaces from time to time.
-I'm allergic to male cats.
-I need 9 hours of sleep.
-I'm not sure if I'll ever find the right girl for me. Even if she sticks around long enough for me to open up to her, there'll probably be some part of my personality that will make a relationship difficult. It doesn't bother me, though. If I'm to die alone, at least I'll have friends.

[ilikexd]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

taking meds for anxiety problem

[Herogashix]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

In a nutshell, everything.

[kmay]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

i think i'm some hideous monster, yet i still think i'm too good for anyone else

i have a horrible work ethic because i never have to try to do better than the average

i think my legs are too long

i have pain in my knuckles and wrist probably from this game.

i have some acne but i dont do anything about it

i'm only social when i'm drunk, but then i'm too social

[Samwais]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

Only one thing about me that I would consider a problem.

-I overthink the simplest things and make things extremely difficult for myself and sometimes for others too. I often find myself thinking about how i should say something to someone, how to articulate, what their reaction will probably be etc. in social situations. This often leads to either me awkwardly acting out my thought pattern or just the other person saying something that makes my whole train of thought void. I often get mad at myself for doing this because it's completely unnecessary.

EDIT: Also seconding this, though I've found ways to work around it.

Stealing this one from dynamo -I have a hard time staying interested in something and often go from hobby to hobby, being intensely motivated at first but then completely being turned off from it a short while later. On the other extreme, if I actually stay interested in something, it turns into an obsession.

[JohnRedWolf87]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

Forgot some things:

-When reading, sometimes I'll get a song stuck in my head that doesn't fit the scene in the book/comic at all, and it makes it hard to concentrate. I often read with music playing to keep this from happening
-Sometimes I'll daydream about negative situations and become internally pissed off or upset for no reason.

[Vendetta21]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

-Sometimes I'll daydream about negative situations and become internally pissed off or upset for no reason.

oh yeah i do this constantly but with stressful shit at work

[Spenner]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

A potential problem with me is wanting to explore the effects of drugs is something I kind of obsess over, and things that have to do with the psyche and consciousness in general, perceiving it, and the malleability of it. This can obviously be done in moderation and with enough caution that there is nothing residual or damaging, but I REALLY get into it. I can read up wiki pages and p/tihkal pages and erowid for hours just fantasizing, though moreso just imagining/putting myself in the shoes of the people who have already done the substance.

I do feel, though, that I always build myself up with fascination into an impulse to buy something. It costs money. I just spent $300 on etizolam and 2c-e, which was as far as I gather, an impulse buy >_> HOWEVER it was "justified" because I foresee a great therapeutic use of the etizolam, and I hope I don't fall into any sort of abuse (I haven't fallen into abusive areas ever, except for kratom on sparse occasion).

Most of the problem with it is the social stigma associated with drug exploration and whatnot. Which I can deal with, it's just that a lot of people will never understand/connect with what's really being done when someone mindful is exploring the changes, and think they are just gettin' hi.

[korny]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

Most of the problem with it is the social stigma associated with drug exploration and whatnot. Which I can deal with, it's just that a lot of people will never understand/connect with what's really being done when someone mindful is exploring the changes, and think they are just gettin' hi.

It can be very frustrating indeed. Very few people in general who even use psychedelics for instance, use them for anything other than "having a good time" in the context of not using them for self-exploration and introspection. This approach fuels the social stigma and turns people away from accepting the legitimacy of psychonauts, which is very unfortunate.

[DossarLX ODI]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

- Remembering details in fragments. I've been trying to be more careful about this but it's still basically impossible for me to deal with. An example is when three people tell me their names, but then I only remember two of the three.
- Long words or words with many of the same letter right next to each other make me more prone to screwing up. When I first saw "Lily Melani" I said "Lily Manas" which is seemingly unrelated but I've noticed this happens more when a lot of the same letter is right near each other
- Over 10 years of anger that's been built up from "in the moment" incidents. There have been quite a few instances where I've wanted to blast people for something incredibly stupid they did and don't listen to my suggestions, but I've showed a lot of restraint over this recently.
- Mentioning a problem, but not being able to solve it

[Jimmymi]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

-Assburgers
-I tend to do and say very cringey stuff and it makes people around me irritated or even angry at me.
-I cant do one thing for more than 40 minutes. I allways itch to do all kinds of different stuff.

[shenjoku]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

I'm always annoyed at how easily I lose motivation on projects. I've started a lot of programming projects then quickly lose motivation because I either run out of interesting things to do or get stuck on a problem too long (see the FFR score tracker I was working on lol). If I don't have someone telling me exactly what to do next I just stop caring or can't figure out what to do. It sucks x.x

[NeonSM]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

^this

[Litodude]

Re: What do you think is wrong with you?

i fucking hate all of you and openly express it