Is cybersex cheating?

[devonin]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

Part of me was wondering about cheating in polygamist relationships, but I can't quite wrap my head about how I would discuss something like that, haha.

If it is behaviour outside that which you both/all are aware of and agree to, it is cheating.

It's pretty simple guys.

[wargasm1]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

Sex is never cheating when you pay for it.

[Raining Nails]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

I still would personally call it cheating. It's the fact that you gave in to the temptation of adulterous behavior.

By implying that the partner is "alright" with it, you're already nullifying any possibility of it being cheating, because it's either serious enough for the SO to leave you, or it's not serious enough and you/your SO have no reason to argue about it because it's a trivial situation. If the previously noted trivial situation turns out to be a lie and ends up being an affair, then it leads right back to cheating. On a personal level, it seems like there's no middle ground -- either you're cheating, or you're not.

Part of me was wondering about cheating in polygamist relationships, but I can't quite wrap my head about how I would discuss something like that, haha.

Good points. I always find open-ended discussions like this interesting.

The whole idea I had behind my example was a "means to an end" argument, and the uncomfortable idea that in certain situations cheating might actually be beneficial for a relationship.

Obviously this is far more often the exception rather than the rule, though I would argue if you are in a relationship where cheating is happening then there is something inherently unfulfilling with that relationship from the outset. If feelings develop for another person outside the relationship it doesn't mean the relationship is flawed - rather, if that person feels the need to act on these feelings without talking with their partner and being open then there is a trust issue. This goes for cyber-relationships or in-person.

Part of this is societally created, as it is very taboo and difficult to tackle the subject of open relationships in today's culture. If this isn't believable, try telling your partner you are attracted to someone else. It is one of the hardest things you can ever do, but if you can work through it, you might have a truly authentic and fulfilling relationship with your partner.

Sorry if that was long-winded

[infinity.]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

If it is behaviour outside that which you both/all are aware of and agree to, it is cheating.

It's pretty simple guys.

"guys i'm right i can't believe you don't see it" doesn't persuade anyone

also thats a terrible definition. cheating is engaging in *serious* relations or actions with anyone that is not your significant other. it really just comes down to personal convictions and prerogatives and understanding one another.

if my girlfriend did something like camming, i wouldn't break up with her because she 'cheated' on me. i'd break up with her because that's weird and whorish

[Mike Weedmark]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

Yup, but it's okay.

[devonin]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

"guys i'm right i can't believe you don't see it" doesn't persuade anyone

And if I said that, your objection would be relevant.

also thats a terrible definition. cheating is engaging in *serious* relations or actions with anyone that is not your significant other. it really just comes down to personal convictions and prerogatives and understanding one another.

So in other words, exactly what I said, and you actually agree with me. Gotcha.

if my girlfriend did something like camming, i wouldn't break up with her because she 'cheated' on me. i'd break up with her because that's weird and whorish

Then you have a definition of cheating that doesn't encompass showing your naked body to someone else. For you that isn't cheating. For many people it is. And the way you tell the difference is that you communicate and make it clear which behaviours count as cheating or not.

[Sidek]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

who need's sex when you have internet??

[infinity.]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

And if I said that, your objection would be relevant.

So in other words, exactly what I said, and you actually agree with me. Gotcha.



Then you have a definition of cheating that doesn't encompass showing your naked body to someone else. For you that isn't cheating. For many people it is. And the way you tell the difference is that you communicate and make it clear which behaviours count as cheating or not.

i have no way of talking to you without wanting to spew ad hominem so i'm just going to tell you that you're both overtly pretentious and misguided

[dragonmegaXX]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

who need's sex when you have internet??

Obviously you have not sex.

[FissionMailed1]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

i have no way of talking to you without wanting to spew ad hominem so i'm just going to tell you that you're both overtly pretentious and misguided

If the poll in this thread is any indication, it is considering cheating for many people, so he isn't speaking for just himself. I don't see how establishing some baselines regarding what cheating is and isn't in a relationship is "misguided" or how he is being "pretentious" if many people share that opinion.

[Izzy]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

If the poll in this thread is any indication, it is considering cheating for many people, so he isn't speaking for just himself. I don't see how establishing some baselines regarding what cheating is and isn't in a relationship is "misguided" or how he is being "pretentious" if many people share that opinion.

I've had that guy on ignore for 3+ years. Please don't quote him.

[FissionMailed1]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

LOL, now I see why. That's a really immature way to handle a debate.

[dragonmegaXX]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

I feel like this is the same as asking if 3-somes are cheating because you're touching someone else's genitals.

[Quigly]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

who need's sex when you have internet??

this is going to be a post that you see a year from now and get really embarrassed about

[devonin]

Re: Is cybersex cheating?

I feel like this is the same as asking if 3-somes are cheating because you're touching someone else's genitals.

If neither of the other two people are your partner maybe. Otherwise, you'd be pretty hard-pressed to have a threesome without your partner consenting.