Too fat or attention-seeking?

[VulcanRevenge]

Re: Too fat or attention-seeking?

"90% of why people communicate is all about being responded to.. it rarely has to do with the information they are sharing."

Hit it right on the head, dsliscoo. I'm not sure where you got that statistic but it makes sense. I think mostly Cold Kitten's just trying to make a plain and simple point that we shouldn't judge people or treat them differently according to looks only, which I think most of us can completely agree with. Nuff said.

[thechild]

Re: Too fat or attention-seeking?

You can't blame the world for being over-weight. Besides, if you are over-weight, make sure you don't smell bad, clean yourself, and wear some 'in' (lol) clothes such as aeropostale, american eagle, etc. then you will be fine.

[Frozen Beat]

Re: Too fat or attention-seeking?

I personally would view that as a simpleton attempt to fit in, and try to be someone that they're not.

Frankly, looks are important because it's wired in our heads, and it's human nature.

If i flashed two photos of random people in front of you, one being a hot girl, the other being a fat girl, which one would you rather stare at?

[~kitty~]

Re: Too fat or attention-seeking?

When it comes down to it, everyone's a failure. The End.

EDIT: Frozen Beat, I wouldn't stare at either. It's rude either way.

[thechild]

Re: Too fat or attention-seeking?

I personally would view that as a simpleton attempt to fit in, and try to be someone that they're not.

Well, this should atleast boost confidence then people will actually talk to them. After that they just be themselves, I don't see where someone is being who they're not.

[Cavernio]

Re: Too fat or attention-seeking?

I think that media and selling things is based too much on looks, and that it can have a seriously negative impact on people, particularly tween girls who seem prone to being obsessed with their weight.

However, if you think about how you look as an art, then I've got a whole other perception of things. I almost think we don't care about looks enough when I think about it this way, or at least we perceive looks differently from how I think we should. Our society, in general, doesn't care enough about looks beyond 'fitting in'. It seems that very few people take their looks and make themselves look the way that THEY want themselves to look. We're told we can and can't wear certain clothes to work and school, people will look at you weird if you're wearing something outside a pretty small fashion window. Fashion designers almost invariably care about their looks in a 'good' way, but they will also always see looks and fashion as art too, and they make it their life and career. People forget that changing your look can be fun.
There's nothing wrong with having a look simply so you can 'fit in', but it's kinda sad that we make ourselves so busy that real fashion is only for special events, and that for most of us, fashion is strongly dictated by the media.

Also, comments like "you're clearly fat because you thought of something that's bad for fat people" really are retarded. I've had my share of comments in the same tone of "well, if that's what you're saying, that means you're such and such", when they're not true. People have brains you know. We can think about things that concern other people.

[Frozen Beat]

Re: Too fat or attention-seeking?

Well, this should atleast boost confidence then people will actually talk to them. After that they just be themselves, I don't see where someone is being who they're not.

Really? I see people like that pretty much all the time. How do you not see it?

[Nu0n]

Re: Too fat or attention-seeking?

The ideals of what man and woman should look like are posted all over adds, TV shows, commercials, and put into are head as a bench mark for what is "best and worse". We then take that public view and start to rate looks by decent, bad, alright, etc. These are all just insecurity, the world has no effect on what you think of yourself. If you allow the worlds views and ideals of what the "best and worst" is and allow it to control your own thoughts of yourself, then you have been living a lie. Live your own life, and let your own ideals be the ones you abide by.

-Nu0n

[ledwix]

Re: Too fat or attention-seeking?

Of course looks matter. They're what cause the first impression. During your everyday life, the main factor determining what gets your attention or not, is how a person looks. Because until you know how they really are inside, looks are all you'll know. And until that point, it will be the only thing that matters.

This is a good point. Looks set the tone in any conversation. Based on how people look when we meet them, we judge them and expect their personalities to slightly resemble the personalities of those we've met earlier who look like them.

And it makes sense; sight is pretty much the dominant perceptive tool in our human perspective of the world. It's the most powerful and longest ranging sense. After all, touch extends only a few feet, taste a few inches, smell a few hundred meters, sound, a few miles at the most. But sight...that extends for light years. Because of its range and strength, it's clearly the dominant way for us to perceive nearly everyone and everything in the world. So most of the data about every person we ever see on the roads, at a large school, in a packed stadium or rally, and on TV is based on their appearance.

It's hard to ignore the vast majority of the data, so it is only logical that we value appearance so much. Personally, I think looks and personality are heavily correlated in the majority of cases. (majority, not absolute, of course) By this, I don't mean that good looks indicate a good personality; I just mean that certain personality types happen to bear certain physical traits and clothing types. Looks are certainly a useful part of the equation to take note of.

When it comes to being good friends with someone, looks don't really affect our ability to stay good friends with them, help them with their experiences, etc. People really don't need to be insecure about their looks with good friends and family; and in the end these are the only ones who are actually very important to us: the ones who will examine our personalities in the greatest detail and really figure out who we are. If people are extremely insecure about their appearance in the presence of close friends due to the influence of advertisements, I believe they are mistaken, since good friends aren't shallow with each other.

But at the same time, we can be very shallow when it comes to light acquaintances or strangers. Advertising is one of the situations where we happen to be shallow since we rarely personally know the people we are seeing in advertisements; most of our information comes from their looks. What I'm trying to say is that I can check girls out all the time while at the same time maintaining a strict standard for what type of personality I am interested in, because they are two different realms. In a more serious situation, I can preserve the quality of my relationships by having a different standard for good friends than for acquaintances. So shallowness doesn't have to preside. For ads, sex just sells a little too well, but that's just how our world works.