Our planet rotates at a modest rate:
1670 kilometers per hour.
The Coriolis Effect used to factor
When calculating for projectile fire;
Bullets travel too fast for it to matter.
Maybe snipers correct for it, maybe not.
Either way, they always hit their target.
Our long range rifles are extraordinary
And we eliminate our foes with efficiency,
But at what cost does all this come with?
It seems like it would cost America less
If we used the same tactics as Hiroshima
And cut an enormous hole in the map
Where the Middle East once stood.
We would win three wars all at the same time
And save money and American Lives.
Is that not the American Dream?
Of course we would never do that;
We have to save face for our pacifist friends;
We have to uphold the regulations of
The UN and the EU and AA
And all of those lovely acronyms
That our bureaucracy is so fond of.
We should go back to Big Stick Diplomacy;
It seems so un-American for us
To not swing our dicks at our fellow men.
So what if white people aren't well-endowed?
Our missiles are our diplomatic dicks,
And our wives fake it for us at home.
Nothing is wrong with our country
If we want to be a British Colony.
We could row our continent to Europe
And have a friendly tea party (this time).
Or we could destroy every living thing.
That would answer our deepest questions:
"Are we the only life in the universe?"
No, we're all dead.
"Is there a god out there?"
No, we're all dead.
"Does life have a larger purpose?"
No, we're all dead.
Or we could continue showing weakness.
We can try to appease everybody.
Let's save as many lives as possible
So we can feed them with our food and money
And use up our resources more quickly
Than if we ignored everybody else
Like George Washington wanted us to do.
The earth probably would not care if we died.
It probably hates us using its resources.
Destroying everything and everyone
Would delight the poor earth and its quest to spin.
It can still rotate without our presence.
At 1670 kilometers per hour
It will rotate with us or without.
1670 kilometers per hour.
The Coriolis Effect used to factor
When calculating for projectile fire;
Bullets travel too fast for it to matter.
Maybe snipers correct for it, maybe not.
Either way, they always hit their target.
Our long range rifles are extraordinary
And we eliminate our foes with efficiency,
But at what cost does all this come with?
It seems like it would cost America less
If we used the same tactics as Hiroshima
And cut an enormous hole in the map
Where the Middle East once stood.
We would win three wars all at the same time
And save money and American Lives.
Is that not the American Dream?
Of course we would never do that;
We have to save face for our pacifist friends;
We have to uphold the regulations of
The UN and the EU and AA
And all of those lovely acronyms
That our bureaucracy is so fond of.
We should go back to Big Stick Diplomacy;
It seems so un-American for us
To not swing our dicks at our fellow men.
So what if white people aren't well-endowed?
Our missiles are our diplomatic dicks,
And our wives fake it for us at home.
Nothing is wrong with our country
If we want to be a British Colony.
We could row our continent to Europe
And have a friendly tea party (this time).
Or we could destroy every living thing.
That would answer our deepest questions:
"Are we the only life in the universe?"
No, we're all dead.
"Is there a god out there?"
No, we're all dead.
"Does life have a larger purpose?"
No, we're all dead.
Or we could continue showing weakness.
We can try to appease everybody.
Let's save as many lives as possible
So we can feed them with our food and money
And use up our resources more quickly
Than if we ignored everybody else
Like George Washington wanted us to do.
The earth probably would not care if we died.
It probably hates us using its resources.
Destroying everything and everyone
Would delight the poor earth and its quest to spin.
It can still rotate without our presence.
At 1670 kilometers per hour
It will rotate with us or without.
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