Chapter One:
In which we meet Henry, his sister, and his inner thoughts.
It was in the year of 1802 when I first laid eyes on him. He had one of his smiles that made women swoon over him. He was always flirting with them, making remarks that only seemed to enhance his popularity. He always did know what to say to everyone.
Well...
Everyone expect me. The horse boy. He always would give me a look and turn on his heel as though I was just a rock in the middle of the road. I suppose, in a way, that's what fueled my ambition. Or maybe it was how he would leave the women with nothing.
"Henry!" a voice called out. My sister. To me, she's the loviest woman in the world. We're twins by the way; hence everyone calls the both of us Henry.
"Yes?" I replied, running off to hug her. We hail from some part of England... somewhere near the edge of England. My education isn't the best.
"You had another spat with him again, didn't you?!" she accused me. Well... I'm not one for lying but... she did threaten me with biscuits... oh god, how I love food.
"No... no... seriously..." I said looking her straight in the eyes. Let me tell you something. My sister is a lie detector. She can smell a lie at two hundred paces, I swear.
"Really? Then what's with the black eye?"
"Black eye?! You mean that creep punched me in the-... busted, aren't I?"
"Oh yes, so busted but anyway, I came here to tell you something!" She looked giddy. And I did not like giddy.
"I'm getting married."
What?!
"WHO GOT YOU PREGANT?!"
"Shut up and listen to me. I'm not pregnant and cook's assistant asked me to marry him."
I'm going to murder him.
"He's your own best friend."
I'm going to enjoy murdering him.
"And he said he would only marry me, if you'd approve and would be his best man."
Who wanted to murder him?
"Uh... sure... wait..."
Wait... why is she still giddy?!
No...not the dreaded question!
"Henry... why don't you get yourself someone?"
Oh, it wasn't the question I thought it was... safe on that.
"Because..."
"I'm still waiting."
Because I don't want to end up like dad.
"Because no one interests me."
I look at her once again. She had mom's emerald green eyes and dad's hair. She had the both of them etched into her body. I don't have any. The only thing I have going for me is my height, and even then, I'm short.
"Sis, don't worry about me. I got my books."
"Books you can't read."
Books I wanted to burn.
"So? It’s fun making out the words... makes it... interesting. Besides, I 'borrowed' his alphabet book... it isn't too bad. I learn slowly."
She looked at me in disbelief and shook her head. She wrapped her delicate arms around me. Her eyes having that knowing look. She knew what would happen if she left. She looked straight into my silver eyes.
"Henry, be careful. I don't want another loved one six feet under ground, or in this case, six feet under manure. I promise to god I will not dig you out," she said, kissing my forehead.
"I pwromise," I said in a baby tone. "And I'll wash behind my ears and in-between me toes."
"And up your nose," she giggled at our old bath time tune. "I can't believe you still remember all of it."
"Up your nose and through the hose. In one ear and out the other. Scrub and scrub until you're through. Then you'll look sorely blue," I continued, bring her face into a rapture of joy. I hoped no one could take that away.
"Dear lord, Henry, I am so going to miss your jokes."
Jokes?
"HENRY! GIT YER ASS BACK TO WORK!" an irritating voice rang in the air. It vibrated through me. Turning around, I gave a smile.
"IN A MINUTE DUNGFART!" I replied and hugged my sister.
"Dungfart?"
"Dunford is just too... too..."
"Do I even want to know?"
"Nay."
"I was right, I have weird baby brother!" she laughed.
"Only by thirteen minutes."
"Bad luck."
"HENRELLA!"
"Coming! Coming!" I kissed my sister on the cheek and rushed off, my boots sticking to the wet ground that seemed to want to suck me in. I'm not the toughest guy around. In fact, most people take me for a girl. The only thing from stopping them from calling me a she, is my name. Thank god for weird uncles.
"So good of you to join us. I say, you look ready," came a snide reply.
"And you looked as though you are the lord of Dung and Farts," I turned around to pick up a rock. It was for the broken pigpen when we last had our fight. It was quite funny to see him groping around and sliding.
"I do you your back doesn't break!"
"Why you nasty, little, sexiest, damnable, stupid of-"
"Did you say something?"
"Oh, only thank you for your concern!"
Arugh! I can just see my hand wrapping around his throat and toggling him!
(Well... I hope you like it... It's only the first chapter but... I think it needs something more... but I just can't figure out what! You'd think I'd know. So, yeah, advice would be greatly appreciated.)
In which we meet Henry, his sister, and his inner thoughts.
It was in the year of 1802 when I first laid eyes on him. He had one of his smiles that made women swoon over him. He was always flirting with them, making remarks that only seemed to enhance his popularity. He always did know what to say to everyone.
Well...
Everyone expect me. The horse boy. He always would give me a look and turn on his heel as though I was just a rock in the middle of the road. I suppose, in a way, that's what fueled my ambition. Or maybe it was how he would leave the women with nothing.
"Henry!" a voice called out. My sister. To me, she's the loviest woman in the world. We're twins by the way; hence everyone calls the both of us Henry.
"Yes?" I replied, running off to hug her. We hail from some part of England... somewhere near the edge of England. My education isn't the best.
"You had another spat with him again, didn't you?!" she accused me. Well... I'm not one for lying but... she did threaten me with biscuits... oh god, how I love food.
"No... no... seriously..." I said looking her straight in the eyes. Let me tell you something. My sister is a lie detector. She can smell a lie at two hundred paces, I swear.
"Really? Then what's with the black eye?"
"Black eye?! You mean that creep punched me in the-... busted, aren't I?"
"Oh yes, so busted but anyway, I came here to tell you something!" She looked giddy. And I did not like giddy.
"I'm getting married."
What?!
"WHO GOT YOU PREGANT?!"
"Shut up and listen to me. I'm not pregnant and cook's assistant asked me to marry him."
I'm going to murder him.
"He's your own best friend."
I'm going to enjoy murdering him.
"And he said he would only marry me, if you'd approve and would be his best man."
Who wanted to murder him?
"Uh... sure... wait..."
Wait... why is she still giddy?!
No...not the dreaded question!
"Henry... why don't you get yourself someone?"
Oh, it wasn't the question I thought it was... safe on that.
"Because..."
"I'm still waiting."
Because I don't want to end up like dad.
"Because no one interests me."
I look at her once again. She had mom's emerald green eyes and dad's hair. She had the both of them etched into her body. I don't have any. The only thing I have going for me is my height, and even then, I'm short.
"Sis, don't worry about me. I got my books."
"Books you can't read."
Books I wanted to burn.
"So? It’s fun making out the words... makes it... interesting. Besides, I 'borrowed' his alphabet book... it isn't too bad. I learn slowly."
She looked at me in disbelief and shook her head. She wrapped her delicate arms around me. Her eyes having that knowing look. She knew what would happen if she left. She looked straight into my silver eyes.
"Henry, be careful. I don't want another loved one six feet under ground, or in this case, six feet under manure. I promise to god I will not dig you out," she said, kissing my forehead.
"I pwromise," I said in a baby tone. "And I'll wash behind my ears and in-between me toes."
"And up your nose," she giggled at our old bath time tune. "I can't believe you still remember all of it."
"Up your nose and through the hose. In one ear and out the other. Scrub and scrub until you're through. Then you'll look sorely blue," I continued, bring her face into a rapture of joy. I hoped no one could take that away.
"Dear lord, Henry, I am so going to miss your jokes."
Jokes?
"HENRY! GIT YER ASS BACK TO WORK!" an irritating voice rang in the air. It vibrated through me. Turning around, I gave a smile.
"IN A MINUTE DUNGFART!" I replied and hugged my sister.
"Dungfart?"
"Dunford is just too... too..."
"Do I even want to know?"
"Nay."
"I was right, I have weird baby brother!" she laughed.
"Only by thirteen minutes."
"Bad luck."
"HENRELLA!"
"Coming! Coming!" I kissed my sister on the cheek and rushed off, my boots sticking to the wet ground that seemed to want to suck me in. I'm not the toughest guy around. In fact, most people take me for a girl. The only thing from stopping them from calling me a she, is my name. Thank god for weird uncles.
"So good of you to join us. I say, you look ready," came a snide reply.
"And you looked as though you are the lord of Dung and Farts," I turned around to pick up a rock. It was for the broken pigpen when we last had our fight. It was quite funny to see him groping around and sliding.
"I do you your back doesn't break!"
"Why you nasty, little, sexiest, damnable, stupid of-"
"Did you say something?"
"Oh, only thank you for your concern!"
Arugh! I can just see my hand wrapping around his throat and toggling him!
(Well... I hope you like it... It's only the first chapter but... I think it needs something more... but I just can't figure out what! You'd think I'd know. So, yeah, advice would be greatly appreciated.)
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