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Old 08-10-2004, 10:23 PM   #1
CypherToorima
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Default Critical Thinking: Can you love someone...

Alright. I have a question for everyone here. Well almost everyone. This question is aimed at the regular age group that posts here(10...er...13-15 or 16 year olds). Do you think that you are capable of actually loving someone outside your family?


My answer is no. I don't feel I am mature enough to actually love someone outside my family. I can like someone as 'more than a friend', but I don't feel I can love them.


Too clear up any confusion, I'm talking about a 'Marriage' sort of 'love'.
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Old 08-10-2004, 10:37 PM   #2
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I say it's possible, but VERY VERY VERY unlikely it will happen. Lots of teenagers mistake their feelings for real love, but it's almost guaranteed not the real thing.
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Old 08-10-2004, 10:42 PM   #3
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Yea, a lot of teenagers think they are in love, but they really aren't. I think its more of a "like"...and you will realize that once you meet a person who you really do love.
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Old 08-10-2004, 10:46 PM   #4
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Yes, I have people outside my family that I love, but in a family-kind of way. Close friends. Maybe you guys are talking about the marriage kind of love.
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Old 08-11-2004, 08:03 AM   #5
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True love? Yes...i think so. Depends on how mature you are about it I guess...and if you've really found the right person or just someone you think is the right person...

I'm 17 though. Was 16 at the time.
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Old 08-11-2004, 08:50 AM   #6
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If you can find any love at all, you can find love in anybody. Why would it be restricted to family? That's pretty stupid logic.
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Old 08-11-2004, 08:53 AM   #7
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there talking about like TRUE TRUE TRUE love where theres no way to seperate you
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Old 08-11-2004, 08:56 AM   #8
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Ok, then that makes both of you sound stupider, because you rarely get that feeling with a family member. It's much more likely with a girlfriend/boyfriend.
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Old 08-11-2004, 08:58 AM   #9
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family love is diffrent >.>
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Old 08-11-2004, 09:02 AM   #10
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Stop posting.
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Old 08-11-2004, 09:02 AM   #11
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Privateer, so you are saying you don't love your family and would want to be separated from them?-I think people do love their family and would do anything to stay as one family if they had to be separated.

I think you can only find true love once or twice...but when you are younger you think you "love" the person...
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Old 08-11-2004, 10:02 AM   #12
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Why would love be restricted to family? Oh..lets see..

Beacuse you've spent your whole life (We'll go with 16 years) with the same people (Hopefully, sorry in advance to all you poor souls out there who's parents are divorced, in jail..etc). You know they're returning the "favor" of love, you love them, they love you. With a BF/GF situation it's different. You may have common intrests, but that dosen't mean that you get along with your significant other.

One example I use is the fact that my parents can stand to be around and socialize with their friends. My dad can stand my mom's friends and vice versa. When people are in a premarrital situation, they tend to cave alot to make their significant other happy. But if your girlfriend dosent like the thing that you enjoy doing (Lets say Paintball, DRR, or somthing), then its not true love. They dont accept the thing YOU like to do.

I could drone on and on, but I find love before you're completely independent from your family to be an extremely fickle thing. It's been done obviously, I know people are going to say that, and thats

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..possible, but VERY VERY VERY unlikely it will happen.
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Old 08-11-2004, 10:16 AM   #13
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First of all, izzi said 'there's no way to seperate you,' which is a much stronger love than just not wanting to be seperated, flypie.

Secondly, if anything, a girlfriend or boyfriend is more suited for you to connect with, in terms of interest. A family member is more of a forced love. I have a very poor relationship with my mother, but I still loosely love her. If I had a very poor relationship with someone out of my family, I obviously wouldn't love them. You get to choose who it is you get attached to in a relationship that doesn't involve family members.

I also could drone on and on about how you are all wrong, but I don't care enough.
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Old 08-11-2004, 10:53 AM   #14
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Privateer, you completely missed the point of this thread. I am talking about people around 13-16 actually loving their girlfriend or boyfriend, or are do they just like them alot.
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Old 08-11-2004, 01:06 PM   #15
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What's the difference? Why does it matter?
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Old 08-11-2004, 02:00 PM   #16
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So, lets establish that not everyone lives in a perfect world.

Its highly unlikely that "Love" will develop while you still have obligations that dont pay. School, chores, etc. People will throw around the word love without knowing what true love feels like. Everyone says that they "Love" their boyfriend or girlfriend and then proceeds to break up with them 7 months later beacuse they're bored of their relationship.

So it can happen, but is unlikely.
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Old 08-11-2004, 11:25 PM   #17
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I agree with Aleco in that it really doesn't matter, but for the sake of discussion...

Yes, but I think sixteen is about the youngest that that's gonna happen. I think it has a lot to do with how soon that person starts to understand the concept of and undertake some responsibility. I'm finding it really hard to explain exactly why those ideas are tied to each other, but I think it has something to do with maturity. When you become mature enough to take responsibility for yourself, mature thoughts come next, one of which is love.

I don't think you can find such feelings with thirteen and fourteen year olds, but moreso with the older ages. I still stand by the fact that I was in love when I was sixteen. I'm nineteen now, and can barely comprehend how much I wanted to be with her, much less how there could possibly be a greater feeling out there if I actually weren't in love.

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Old 08-12-2004, 01:18 AM   #18
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If I met the right girl...but probably not...all I want is sex really. All teenage boys want sex. THAT IS ALL. I use to think I was more sofisiticated than that...but really, I just wanted sex. Though I would like to have sex with a girl who shares common interests.

I thought I was in love once. When I woke up, I thought about her *not in a sexual way* and when I went to bed I thought about her *not in a sexual way...well, occasionally, I'm only human.* At school, she was always on my mind. I even wrote her a song...well, technically 6 songs...including "Water Like Pudding." But it was all a lie. I just wanted sex. I still want sex...just give me bang bang bang and shut up.
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Old 08-12-2004, 01:21 AM   #19
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ahhh..
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Old 08-12-2004, 12:09 PM   #20
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Possibly.

I think that it is possible to fall in love at an early age, but unlikely. I know this sounds odd, but people out age are still in high school and college and our lives are still unfolding in front of our eyes. True love is something that would get in the way of my life at the moment. Sounds selfish, I know, but that is how I see things. I will elaborate more when my thoughts are actually on this subject. I don't normally think about this subject too often.
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