[DaBackpack]

I normally don't take on a normative standpoint when it comes to these things, but I think something needs to be said here.

What you have described is not normal.

It reads like a lack of emotional maturity. It's really obvious from how you've described your "adult side": reasoning, strategy, and perversion aren't signs of maturity. Most people would say something about stability, interpersonal skills, compassion, and self-awareness when it comes to the notion of maturity. This isn't really your fault, for reasons you've stated, but I think it's still something that you'll need to address in order to integrate into society properly.

I honestly think that, if you haven't brought this up with a therapist, you should, because emotional maturity is one of the most important skills you can have when it comes to dealing with the real world.

This is going to come off as an attack on your character, and even if it does, I'm being sincere and I hope that you at least listen to what I and others have to say about the topic.