[Funnygurl555]

eh why not

since my last post, i became a citizen 8). i saw my brother at the ceremony and was mentally gone for a bit, but i was in treatment so i was able to deal. i tried rekindling a relationship with my parents but that never truly worked out. in october i came out to them, which was as bad as it could've been. one of my friends from treatment tried to get me back into comedy, and i did my first set since getting sober on my mom. it went well, but it was kinda dark. after that, i started getting more serious about comedy and started hitting up local comedy clubs in the twin cities. i started going to therapy pretty regularly because i still wasn't okay after my life legit blowing up. my dad got so depressed after i came out that he yeeted off to somalia, where he still is.

i finished treatment in december, and that meant that treatment wasn't paying for my housing anymore. i thought i'd be okay, since i had a few part-time gigs, but i didn't count on the holidays being a hard time to make money. i spent that month not knowing if i was gonna be able to make my sober house's rent in jan and mentally prepping myself to be homeless. one of my last-ditch efforts was getting a job at target, which is where i still work, but i didn't start until late january anyways.

once it was pretty obvious i wasn't gonna get enough money i applied for emergency assistance through the government, and on new years eve i was approved. i was on the streets a week later anyways, because the check didn't go directly to my sober house owner and instead to the actual owner of the house-- it was some bullshit. i spent a night in a shelter and the following morning asked the govt center to talk to my sober house owner and i was let back in. i came down with the flu a couple days later and was in bed for a week. i didn't get to start working again until late jan, which was w a y too late to make a paycheck to pay rent, so once again i was screwed. i asked my sober house owner if she could wait a week. she declined and told me to ask family or friends for money-- i must have money, right? because i went to princeton, so i have "RICH PRINCETON FRIENDS." i gave her a big no and she gave me 30 minutes to pack my shit (even though i still had a couple days until feb lawwdd i still hate this woman). i packed my shit while crying and cursing about my sober house owner to my roommates. they helped me get back into the shelter i went into last time.

i hopped on the bus to get there before it closed, but my phone died and i didn't have directions, which meant i wasn't even gonna make it there in time. i went into a restaurant to charge my phone and asked my sponsor if she could drive me there. and she responded by letting me sleep on her couch until i got on my feet again. she fucking saved me.

three weeks later i found the place i'm currently at (not a sober house, BLESS ugh). i worked two jobs-- one at target and one as a tutor-- and began saving up so that i'd never have to go through that again. when the pandemic hit i couldn't tutor anymore so i just work at target, which has been pretty nice honestly. i had my gripes with that tutoring gig, though it was good money not gonna lie.

my mom got in contact with me again to tell me that my sister was an alcoholic. she wanted my help because i fixed my own shit. my sister didn't know that i knew about her substance abuse issues though, so i was funneling advice through my mom. turned out that her husband was both physically and emotionally abusive, so i started telling my mom to get her out, but she refused because there were kids involved (same kids who see their dad beating their mom but alright). couple weeks later my sister was in the hospital because her husband attempted to kill her. he was in jail awaiting trial, but they dropped the charges on him because they have a family. anyways i was so freaking mad about this i refused to help my family through shit anymore. last i heard she still drank and was going in and out of treatments. whatever.

since then life's actually been like... stable. for the first time in YEARS there hasn't been some bullshit to go through and it's like SO NICE oh my god. like i'm a normal person. i mean there was a pandemic and the protests here recently, but that's the world going through stuff and not just me, you know? it's been good. i have no idea what to do from here, though.

i'm also still sober which has been awesome for me. wouldn't have thought that a year ago, damn. i'm a square

edit: there's like, some wild stories about the friends i've made in recovery but that didn't impact my life as much as it taught me some life lessons