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-   -   what is your opinion of teenage/children dating (http://www.flashflashrevolution.com/vbz/showthread.php?t=75102)

Mookage 08-15-2007 09:17 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Personally I don't think children should be dating. Teenagers are different though because they get more freedom and are beginning to make choices that influence their life. My dad always told me to date a lot of girls so I know what I like about them and what I dislike. A lot of young children mistake liking a person for loving them. The age I think that carries the nessecary freedom and decision making ability for a succesful relationship is about 15. This may not be so in all cases, depending on the maturity of the people involved.

slipstrike0159 08-16-2007 02:06 AM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Ok, sorry if someone was saying this already and i thought it meant something else but...

The way i look at dating is this: Once you turn 16 and have the ability to drive your date and get a job to make money to spend on dates is when you should start. Realitically if you date before that you are doing so without a lot of knowledge because of your age which in most cases undoubtably ends up very badly.

As for the reasons behind dating. Dating in your teenage years is one of the best ways of finding qualities and characteristics that you might like in a future spouse. Through the whole dating process you meet people and talk with people gathering information about what you like, which is essentially helping you learn. Then once you find the person who has a good deal of those characteristics you admired in other dates and if you get along very well then you marry them. Its just a matter of starting at the right time to make it most effective. To say that dating is fruitless is to say that going to school is fruitless in many of the same ways. Also, dating shouldnt be a serious thing until you are old enough to be looking for a serious spouse so mostly its just a matter of having fun with your friends and the people you like.

I want to make a point too that Dating and Steady Dating are two completely different things. As teenagers we are really not mature enough to be STEADY DATING mainly because steady dating is what you lead up to with the person you really think you have the possibility of marrying. Also its like i said before, if you are steady dating then you are really only experiencing that one person and you miss out on the opportunities of enjoying the presence of other personalities.

If this came off as sounding like a preachy lesson then i appologize. That is how i look at the whole thing though.

Tex :) 08-16-2007 02:30 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Mookage (Post 1730178)
Personally I don't think children should be dating. Teenagers are different though because they get more freedom and are beginning to make choices that influence their life. My dad always told me to date a lot of girls so I know what I like about them and what I dislike. A lot of young children mistake liking a person for loving them. The age I think that carries the nessecary freedom and decision making ability for a succesful relationship is about 15. This may not be so in all cases, depending on the maturity of the people involved.

Like mookage and I said, children dating is stupid... while older teens on the other hand, is normal, and pretty much ok.

Shad_Zero 08-16-2007 05:07 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
I think that teens should have the right to date, why? Because when they become adults, they will need to know how to start a relationship with the opposite, or the same sex. Life isn't fun by yourself yes. So teens dating, sure why not?

Now as for the youngbucks, I don't think they should be dating. Because little kids need their time to be innocent. The time for them to be going out with others will come. But if they start dating at 8 and stuff, what do you think they're gonna do when they get older?

Keep the kids away from rap videos plz. XD

-Live_Free- 08-16-2007 05:23 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
I'm 18 going my my girl that is 16, we've been going out for about 3years now and everything has been going just fine. In fact we have both planned getting engaged right after college . So I do think that teens can make mature decisions.

Aa_Doodaa 08-16-2007 06:58 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
It's obvious that young children (0-7) will not engage in the dating process, so i'll start with the possible group of 8-12.

I think that it shouldn't even be considered "dating" at that age. Puppy love, for lack of a better term, is more like it. This is where gossip is taken up by children, talking about who "likes" who, and things of the sort.

For ages 13-19 however, dating and relating with the opposite sex in a somewhat romantic matter is an important part of being a teenager. If it were not for this phase of life, people would be introduced to dating in an immature and inexperienced fashion.

I'm probably just repeating people, but the main point is that teenage dating is a vital learning experience.

EDIT
Quote:

Originally Posted by Mookage (Post 1730178)
Personally I don't think children should be dating. Teenagers are different though because they get more freedom and are beginning to make choices that influence their life. My dad always told me to date a lot of girls so I know what I like about them and what I dislike. A lot of young children mistake liking a person for loving them. The age I think that carries the necessary freedom and decision making ability for a successful relationship is about 15. This may not be so in all cases, depending on the maturity of the people involved.

I'll assume that your definition of "child" is someone in the group or 8-14.

It is very true that you learn the values of character in a possible significant other by experimenting with dating, though I think that this absorbing of knowledge can take place at a younger age than 15. I would say that a 10 year old with a boyfriend/girlfriend (puppy love) is already learning things that he likes and dislikes regarding the opposite sex, though someone this age obviously cannot engage in a serious relationship, so I agree that 15 is a good age to start looking into relationships deeper.

DeMoNpUpPeT 08-18-2007 06:46 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Well first of all I think dating at any age of childhood or as teenagers is plain wrong.
Dating is for finding someone that you want to be with and if your not doing anything to contribute to that then you shouldn't be dating.
Second of all, if so you are dating kids and teenagers are so immature about these things.
Love is word that gets thrown around often.. without even know what it actually means.
I believe that you can't know what it means unless you are mature.
Let's just face it some people never become mature enough.

Third, there is no pratice in dating.
What is there to find out.
Your goal should be to find the one you can be yourself with.

devonin 08-19-2007 02:24 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Quote:

Love is word that gets thrown around often.. without even know what it actually means.
I believe that you can't know what it means unless you are mature.
I would argue instead that you can't know what it means unless you've thought you were in it, acted as such, and later discovered that it wasn't what you thought it was.

jakeyjake7 08-19-2007 02:43 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
i think you should at least be old enough to understand love. like high school. age 15 or 16 i think.

devonin 08-19-2007 03:46 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Well, if children can't understand love, I suppose there'd be no negative effects if every parent simply stopped telling their children that they loved them?

Aa_Doodaa 08-19-2007 04:11 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by DeMoNpUpPeT (Post 1735891)
Well first of all I think dating at any age of childhood or as teenagers is plain wrong.
Dating is for finding someone that you want to be with and if your not doing anything to contribute to that then you shouldn't be dating.
Second of all, if so you are dating kids and teenagers are so immature about these things.
Love is word that gets thrown around often.. without even know what it actually means.
I believe that you can't know what it means unless you are mature.
Let's just face it some people never become mature enough.

Third, there is no pratice in dating.
What is there to find out.
Your goal should be to find the one you can be yourself with.

I'd say that the large majority of people don't get married to the first person they date, so does that make all the dating they did before they met that special person pointless? Not at all. All of that previous dating was for the purpose of gaining experience in the field.

Also, that "pointless" dating requires responsibility and thought, which is the base of maturity. Without teenage dating, many people would lack the traits required to be considered mature.

Another thing, maturity levels are substantially different between people, saying that a certain age group should be considered immature is absurd, to an extent.



EDIT::
Quote:

Originally Posted by devonin (Post 1737253)
Well, if children can't understand love, I suppose there'd be no negative effects if every parent simply stopped telling their children that they loved them?

Another epic win by devonin. I should start putting these in my sig.

GuidoHunter 08-19-2007 04:17 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by devonin (Post 1737253)
Well, if children can't understand love, I suppose there'd be no negative effects if every parent simply stopped telling their children that they loved them?

Surely you're not suggesting that the love one feels for one's wife is the same as the love he has for his mother.

I mean, if you're not Oedipus, of course.

--Guido

http://andy.mikee385.com

teh_masterers 08-19-2007 04:28 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
well its alright as long as your not havin sex on the first date or drinking heavily or smoking crack which might lead to sex but i dont think like 10,11 and 12 year olds should date but thats my opinion

DN_Catastrophic 08-19-2007 04:31 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Children shouldn't be able to date, too young and immature to make big decisions. Teenagers that are starting to gain experience in what they are doing shouldn't be held back from this. I mean life is short so just have fun and do what you can to enjoy it, why have to worry about little things when your eventually going to die later. I mean if your going to worry about these ideas that you think are "bad" then, in my opinion, you are not living life to fullest and not having as much fun as you can while you are here. Teenagers should have their fun and if they make a mistake let them learn from it so they wont encounter it again.

devonin 08-19-2007 04:32 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by GuidoHunter (Post 1737310)
Surely you're not suggesting that the love one feels for one's wife is the same as the love he has for his mother.

I mean, if you're not Oedipus, of course.

--Guido

http://andy.mikee385.com

Why do Romantic love and Platonic love need to be entirely seperate entities? Just because the visible output of affection is canted differently in the two cases doesn't mean they aren't very similar.

In fact, forget Oedipus, Freud was happy to point out the ways in which children are actually quite sexual in their love. The ideal to a child is their mother for caring for them, protecting them, and giving them what they need to live. As they grow older and can start being more independant, their ideal is their father, who is strong, supportive and protective.

I'm noticing a not small number of similarities between these characteristics and many of the characteristics of a successful romantic relationship.

Romantic love and Platonic love are both love. The love a man feels for his wife is not the same as the love he feels for his mother, but they are both love.

Aa_Doodaa 08-19-2007 06:24 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by DN_Catastrophic (Post 1737336)
Children shouldn't be able to date, too young and immature to make big decisions.

That's why there are laws against marrying at certain ages, I wouldn't say that dating at such a young age is a huge choice in life.
Quote:

Originally Posted by DN_Catastrophic (Post 1737336)
Teenagers that are starting to gain experience in what they are doing shouldn't be held back from this.

You get experience from trying something, so if children "shouldn't be able to date," how are those teenagers supposed to gain experience before they become teens?
Quote:

Originally Posted by DN_Catastrophic (Post 1737336)
I mean life is short so just have fun and do what you can to enjoy it, why have to worry about little things when your eventually going to die later. I mean if your going to worry about these ideas that you think are "bad" then, in my opinion, you are not living life to fullest and not having as much fun as you can while you are here.

Now you're saying that children shouldn't care for your opinion, and date anyway, because then they wouldn't be living life to the fullest?
Quote:

Originally Posted by DN_Catastrophic (Post 1737336)
Teenagers should have their fun and if they make a mistake let them learn from it so they wont encounter it again.

I agree, but I also think that if these mistakes are made at an earlier age, they can be learned from earlier as well.

DN_Catastrophic 08-19-2007 07:03 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Aa_Doodaa (Post 1737480)
That's why there are laws against marrying at certain ages, I wouldn't say that dating at such a young age is a huge choice in life.

You get experience from trying something, so if children "shouldn't be able to date," how are those teenagers supposed to gain experience before they become teens?

Now you're saying that children shouldn't care for your opinion, and date anyway, because then they wouldn't be living life to the fullest?

I agree, but I also think that if these mistakes are made at an earlier age, they can be learned from earlier as well.

1.Yeah, but i wasn't talking about marriage. I was talking about how little kids shouldn't be able to "date" since there is still a lot for them to learn.

2.I just don't think that children are even ready to be dating, and the teenage years are where you start to learn about all of that stuff.

3.I was talking about the teenagers. I would've thought that you understood that by the 1st sentence where i said children aren't ready.

Aa_Doodaa 08-19-2007 09:47 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by DN_Catastrophic (Post 1737515)
1.Yeah, but i wasn't talking about marriage. I was talking about how little kids shouldn't be able to "date" since there is still a lot for them to learn.

Do you disagree that it would be more beneficial for people to learn about dating at the youngest age that their maturity permits, for the purpose of better preparation?

DN_Catastrophic 08-19-2007 10:34 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Aa_Doodaa (Post 1737731)
Do you disagree that it would be more beneficial for people to learn about dating at the youngest age that their maturity permits, for the purpose of better preparation?

No i do not disagree, and of course their parents should be able to talk to them and tell them all they need to no. I just don't think a child so young (young as in under 12 or 13) should actually be put into that situation. I just think they are way to young and immature to handle and understand dating.

Relambrien 08-19-2007 10:58 PM

Re: what is your opinion of teenage/children dating
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by DN_Catastrophic (Post 1737808)
No i do not disagree, and of course their parents should be able to talk to them and tell them all they need to no. I just don't think a child so young (young as in under 12 or 13) should actually be put into that situation. I just think they are way to young and immature to handle and understand dating.

You make the assumption that all 12 and 13 year olds are too immature to date.

As devonin would say, "All generalizations are false."


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