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-   -   Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance (http://www.flashflashrevolution.com/vbz/showthread.php?t=142212)

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 03:14 AM

Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
I normally am not harsh on other people for their looks, but deep inside my brain there's this thought process that's effectively a sorority hazing laser beam and it puts hypercritical modeling agents to shame

if you think you're clever by posting a pic of me just wait until someone actually does it

edit: if you post a pic of yourself make sure you REALLY want me to do this I don't want to fuck up anyone's day

EtienneSM 06-27-2015 03:19 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Abate: SSBM player


Arch0wl 06-27-2015 03:27 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by EtienneSM (Post 4331395)
Abate: SSBM player


no upper lip

disproportional teeth (canines go up too far)

nose is way too huge toward the bottom

guy needs a haircut because his hair is covering his ear

facial hair looks like shit (should be groomed at the cheeks and chin)

eyebrow hair is oddly inconsistent along the middle and needs shaving

adams apple too big

doesn't even lift

V-Ormix 06-27-2015 03:30 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
rip me a new one bby

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 03:33 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
that pic isn't loading for some reason but are you sure man lol

V-Ormix 06-27-2015 03:34 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
yeah face book image urls are garbage so I re uped (fixed)

edit: o btw I don't know how to resize images so I put it in a spoiler rofl

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 03:39 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
aight

I feel bad doing this because this is like a sorority hazing group that exists only in my head and I never let it out on anybody but I'm a promise-keeper in this thread so:

Quote:

Originally Posted by V-Ormix (Post 4331397)
rip me a new one bby

hairline recedes far too much (would look better bald)

eyebrows/eyes separated too far

eyes look like horizontal alien teardrops

mustache is too wide and extends past the horizontal line of the lip in a way that looks gross

dark circles (either genetic in which case you're fucked like I am, or you need more sleep)

beard is too thick and obscures jawline

doesn't even lift?

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 03:44 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
holy christ I immediately regret this thread I feel like a horrible person lmao

let's keep it going though I'll power through it

V-Ormix 06-27-2015 03:46 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Those all seem like legit points that I couldn't pretend to argue offensively about (not that I would knowing the idea behind the thread anyways) I actually enjoyed that

Rapta 06-27-2015 04:44 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Good luck m8

Can someone tell me how to do a spoiler?
edit: thanks Haku!

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 04:55 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
you're in luck because I slept with a girl who had features like this and can identify which ones I noticed when she started to annoy me

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rapta (Post 4331411)
http://www.mrwallpaper.com/wallpapers/emily-rudd-model-1680x1050.jpg

nose is huge relative to lip size and makes her mouth look small

jaw/face is wide which makes her cheeks big and also aids in her mouth being smaller than the rest of her face

obvious smile lines they were trying to photoshop

upper lip folds inward somewhat

nose is too rounded toward the nostrils

doesn't even lift

V-Ormix 06-27-2015 06:07 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

Hateandhatred 06-27-2015 06:08 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 


Edit: Be a man and rip this one a new one.


Arch0wl 06-27-2015 06:14 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by V-Ormix (Post 4331416)

I am not doing this one, he's a regular here and he didn't consent to it

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 06:23 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
all right, worst person 2015 goes to me. if I believed in hell I'd definitely be going there

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hateandhatred (Post 4331417)

most obviously, the fact that this condition makes him permanently stuck in a derp face

asymmetrical eyes, obviously

teeth protruding from lower lip, also obviously

forehead too huge relative to hairstyle

right and left ear are different sizes

has a right eyebrow but no left eyebrow

gray hair along sides -- needs uniform hair color

glasses are too big for face

wrinkles next to nose

nose is asymmetrical

double chin

dark circles under eyes

wrinkles in general due to natural aging and growth hormone decline although the dude is 73 now so holy shit

doesn't even lift

Quote:


*deep breath*

asymmetrical eye placement

marks on side of face and on face in general

eyebrows are too thin

nose looks kinda fetal alcohol syndrome (no bridge)

most importantly she's like 10 and from what I can tell burn victim I don't really have any ideas for how 10 year olds are supposed to look

doesn't even lift

V-Ormix 06-27-2015 06:30 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 06:35 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by V-Ormix (Post 4331421)

too tanned for his features -- his tan obscures his lip color and, secondarily, contributes to aging. (this is because tanning is the body's response to skin dying by trying to save skin. he would not have skin like this if this were not a photoshopped picture.)

eyebrows too wide

nostrils too big vertically-speaking

upper lip too thin, doesn't create a symmetrical lip shape

lips should be wider to match nose size

age lines on forehead

cheeks are flat (no visible cheekbones)

doesn't even lift

Coolboyrulez0 06-27-2015 07:30 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 07:37 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Coolboyrulez0 (Post 4331426)

mustache needs to be shaved, makes an awkward line from nose to mouth and looks out of place

eyes/eyebrows are set too close together

lips too thin

little to no separation between lower lip/mouth and chin

hairstyle doesn't complement head shape

wrinkles on eyes/dark circles

wrinkles on forehead

eyebrows fairly thin on the edges but thick on the inside

upper part of his nose is too thick for the shape

ears pushing out too much

doesn't even lift

Funnygurl555 06-27-2015 08:23 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 08:41 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Funnygurl555 (Post 4331429)

hairline recedes too far

eyebrows thin toward the edges

abs are undefined

oblique muscles are barely visible

might lift but wow dwayne looking real soft bro

Dynam0 06-27-2015 09:20 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

ShadowDueler97 06-27-2015 09:33 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
This thread is just terrible and I love it

Reincarnate 06-27-2015 09:37 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

Samus Aran 06-27-2015 11:36 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

Winrar 06-27-2015 12:17 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
For the picture of hitler I would have added some comedy like, "Couldn't finish what he started"

Walrusizer 06-27-2015 01:43 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

choof 06-27-2015 02:08 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

choof 06-27-2015 02:10 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
i am 100% aware that i look like shit

Red Blaster 06-27-2015 03:02 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

Wayward Vagabond 06-27-2015 03:57 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

blindreper1179 06-27-2015 04:44 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 07:46 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
there's not much to criticize (facially) for this one, plastic surgery + makeup + photoshop takes care of nearly everything, but uhhh

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dynam0 (Post 4331434)

eyebrows could be thicker toward the middle to have that taper effect

upper lip and lower lip are disproportional, upper lip needs to be bigger and lower lip smaller for better symmetry

doesn't even lift

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 07:49 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Reincarnate (Post 4331436)

too tanned, has dried out / aged skin and blends in with lip color

nose bridge is too thick toward the middle

upper lip/lower lip somewhat thin

...

that's about it dude this guy is basically one of the best looking human beings I've ever seen

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 07:52 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Samus Aran (Post 4331446)

cheeks way too big

is a baby

doesn't even lift

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 07:59 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
fuck

Quote:

Originally Posted by Walrusizer (Post 4331471)

makeup obscures facial traits too much for me to tell

body fat does also, for example his ear looks like it's wedged into his head but that's probably an effect of his body fat percentage.

also can't tell what his jawline is like due to body fat. if this dude lost a lot of BF% his head wouldn't be a spiked penis

also, his eyebrows are drawn in

also, doesn't even lift

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 08:01 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by choof (Post 4331477)

hair/facial hair exaggerates head shape and downplays facial advantages

lip pucker facial expression makes lips artificially thin

sunglasses so I can't tell much about eyes

bf% seems high but maybe not

doesn't even lift?

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 08:03 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
not much on this one this dude is surprisingly great looking

Quote:

Originally Posted by Red Blaster (Post 4331492)

lips are somewhat small relative to chin size

bump along nose bridge (I have this same thing, lol)

doesn't even lift

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 08:06 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by blindreper1179 (Post 4331505)

orange color and hair contrasts poorly with skin tone

dark circles under eyes

fairly thick nose bridge

age lines near nose

cosplaying goku, but doesn't even lift

xVaLoRx 06-27-2015 08:25 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

how about this nerd

Xayphon 06-27-2015 08:29 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Arch0wl (Post 4331551)
also can't tell what his jawline is like due to body fat. if this dude lost a lot of BF% his head wouldn't be a spiked penis

ded

.Gazelle. 06-27-2015 08:48 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
just fuck my shit up

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 08:55 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
are you the girl or the guy

if you are the girl do you have kik

Red Blaster 06-27-2015 08:57 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Lmao

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 08:58 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
get ready son it's about to go high gravity

Quote:

Originally Posted by xVaLoRx (Post 4331557)

how about this nerd

thickness along bridge of nose

dark circles under eyes that the pic obscures

sideburns too thick

hair too clumped in the front

moonface

body fat about 8% too much

biceps don't fill out arm

side delts not even visible through suit

wrists too small

obvious neck fat

obvious fat under jawline that would create double chin

collar of dress shirt isn't tucked into suit jacket properly

thin fingers

suit jacket clumped up toward the back because no back muscles

barely even lifts, if at all

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 09:10 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
now you might think I'm constantly looking at my flaws but I'm really not

one, 'flaws' really don't matter

two, this is a mode of thought I never turn on, so I'm not thinking this way 99% of the time

and three, I view myself as a giant gundam of a white guy controlled by a station of gnomes with levers, while one gnome just shouts shit over intercom.

Wayward Vagabond 06-27-2015 09:26 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Gazelle is the dude lol

Arch0wl 06-27-2015 09:54 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
well he looks like my fiancee's brother

most I can tell w/ sunglasses on is nose is disproportionately large and chin is a little small

oh, and doesn't even lift

Tokzic 06-27-2015 10:05 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
questionable thread

rayword45 06-27-2015 10:40 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Rip me one daddy my ego needs a shrinking. Also admittedly have not lifted since October 8th 1994

FoJaR 06-27-2015 11:28 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Arch0wl (Post 4331599)
well he looks like my fiancee's brother

most I can tell w/ sunglasses on is nose is disproportionately large and chin is a little small

oh, and doesn't even lift

when did you get engaged? did i miss something?

TheSaxRunner05 06-27-2015 11:34 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
I haven't seen so many people saying "do me" since the backstreet boys came to the Kiel Center in Saint Louis on November 17, 1999.

Just Sayin

.Gazelle. 06-28-2015 12:25 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Arch0wl (Post 4331599)
well he looks like my fiancee's brother

most I can tell w/ sunglasses on is nose is disproportionately large and chin is a little small

oh, and doesn't even lift

b-but i do lift

xVaLoRx 06-28-2015 01:19 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Arch0wl (Post 4331571)
moonface

lol

mrpreggers 06-28-2015 04:49 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
ooo rayword is even tinier and cuter than i thought
NICE

Arch0wl 06-28-2015 10:45 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
will get around to answering pic responses later but

Quote:

Originally Posted by FoJaR (Post 4331657)
when did you get engaged? did i miss something?

at least a few months ago

I use "girlfriend" and "fiancee" depending on which is more conversationally convenient, so that might be a source of confusion

it's still an open relationship but it causes a lot of weird looks when people are unaware that it is and it looks like I'm committing adultery or something

Quote:

Originally Posted by .Gazelle. (Post 4331731)
b-but i do lift

yes but even if you lift you might not even lift

here is an instructional video if you need help determining whether you lift:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OloLS5kTrVs

Coolboyrulez0 06-28-2015 10:52 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
dont wanna derail this into dom vid thread this is mandatory watching

rayword45 06-28-2015 11:16 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by mrpreggers (Post 4331918)
ooo rayword is even tinier and cuter than i thought
NICE

i was only 16 at the time of that photo being taken

although tbh i'm 17 now and look the same lol

ShadowDueler97 06-28-2015 11:59 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
tbf asians don't age until they're like 60 or something

IamMe90 06-28-2015 05:04 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 


do your worst alfred. i'm ready

Samus Aran 07-1-2015 11:09 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

FoJaR 07-2-2015 11:12 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Arch0wl (Post 4331951)
will get around to answering pic responses later but



at least a few months ago

I use "girlfriend" and "fiancee" depending on which is more conversationally convenient, so that might be a source of confusion

it's still an open relationship but it causes a lot of weird looks when people are unaware that it is and it looks like I'm committing adultery or something

congrats man!

Arch0wl 07-3-2015 01:18 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
thanks man

I'm having a hard time answering replies because I've been in not the best of moods lately and there's too much risk that I'll mean something I say, so I'm waiting until I'm in better shape to get back to this

DDRBaller123 08-23-2015 02:26 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
do tubgirl

Clownpiece 08-31-2015 01:25 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 

Ohaider 08-31-2015 04:06 PM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Arch0wl (Post 4352656)
face looks bad, balding

Nice

Litodude 09-1-2015 06:12 AM

Re: Post pics of a person and I will ruthlessly criticize their appearance
 
can i get in on this or will i get banned again


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