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You're playing poker with a tiger, a horse, an octopus, a lizard, and a cyanobacterium. You're holding Ks Kh and the flop is 3c 10h Jh. The tiger snappily growls at you and seems unhappy about something and it thumps the floor with its front paws and bets 3 times the minimum. The horse makes an annoying neighing sound that you can't interpret and makes a raise to 8x the minimum. The octopus and lizard both fold. The cyanobacterium already folded preflop and is making a nuisance of itself continually doing things that cyanobacteria do that are annoying to humans. Do you fold, call, raise, or run screaming?

Which microorganism do you hate the most right now?

How similar does the computer in your avatar look to the computer that you're using right now?

You wake up and you're floating in the middle of the ocean wearing nothing but a lifejacket and swimming trunks. You have absolutely no idea how the hell you ended up in this situation, and as you look around you, you can't really see any land except for really far off. You find a note in your lifejacket pocket, and you unfold it. Taking care not to get it wet, you read it. It's handwritten:

I have no idea how both of us landed in this predicament. Maybe you shouldn't have played those pocket Kings the way you did? We'll never know. Anyway, as far as I'm concerned, we still have a few logistical issues to go through before we can finish this... well, thing. Fill in this note, and I will rescue you. There's a pen in the other pocket.

Question 1. Children's birthday cards sometimes have a pull-out badge that usually displays what? Age[] Shoe size[]

Question 2. What is 13 minus 3? 10[] 2[]

Question 3. What word beginning with B is a word used to describe a newborn infant? Baby[] Wasp[]

The rest of the note is full of frivolous multiple choice questions like this, 30 of them, except the last question is: Write an essay involving exactly 7 carrots, 3 computer keyboards, and 2 chairs.

So, you fill it in because you have nothing else to do. You get to the last question (the essay) and before you start writing, some random guy on a jetski dressed in a superman costume approaches you. You can't see his face properly because of the costume so you don't know who he is. He grabs the note from you.

"You got all the multiple choice questions right," he says, "but you're going to have to write this essay pretty quickly before I'm allowed to rescue you. Come on, we haven't got long."

You estimate there's enough space below the prompt to write about 100 words or so. What do you write?