Trapped

[Impulso]

I'm just looking for some constructive criticism on a poem that I wrote. I thought I'd put it in literature section (I couldn't think of anywhere else)


Trapped

My thoughts, free like the ocean, yet trapped like the midnight fog.

I trek through the rough, in search of comfort, the comfort that my mind is unknown to.

My mind, caged like the ravenous beasts of the night.

Yet the cage proves to be somewhat of a saviour, rescuing me from the searing, eternal pain and sorrow of my thoughts.

I am trapped

I lay victim to the primary enemy of this make-shift hell

I yearn for freedom, yet with freedom comes harsh despair. The despair of my mind.

My cries fall upon deaf ears;only I, I can select my own fate

My thoughts; the very cage that seals me. i will remain here, for the purpose of staying alive.

I am Trapped


--Impulso--


Thanks in advance to everyone that reads this

[robertsona]

lol

[midnghtraver]

lol