[DonCasablanca]

Aasum and jewpin, I think we all know the real question here. You don't have to hide it.

Why discuss these superficial, insubstantial thoughts when we can get at the real meat of the dilemma? At the very marrow of the human experience? At the juicy center of all that transcends this earthly realm and makes life (at least life from 7am-midnight, excluding holidays) meaningful?

Personally, I think Popeye's is better than KFC. Not only are the prices more reasonable, the service more smiley, and the establishments better-kempt, but there is so much more for one's palette to explore! You have your family meal-deals -- the two-piece, the three-piece, the breast, the white meat, the dark meat -- but above that is the wondrous realm of the chicken-finger meal! And here, Popeye's outdoes KFC hands down. No, wait -- hands up! Like on a thrilling roller coaster ride, but with fried chicken. Explore Popeye's endless mixing possibilities with their splendid array of sauces. Create the perfect boneless chicken eating experience -- try honey mustecue sauce, or barbecetchup, or perhaps even grape jellustard.

And then, sink your teeth into that far crispier, warmer, and golden-browner biscuit, slathered in deliciously congealed cornseed oil (you found it in those packets labelled "butter"). Wait, did you forget your spicey fries?! Eat those first, save the biscuit for last. Oh man, not that those spicey fries aren't exquisite -- so, spicey, and, fried. Wash that slimy residue off the roof of your mouth with that tall cup of Coke -- that's right, you could get a Coke, because you went to Popeye's instead of KFC. Sit back, content, satisfied, knowing that even if you lick your fingers for the next hour they'll still feel greasy. Damn, that was good. You'll probably need a cigarette.

I'm kind of hungry. I think I'll go eat.