[DN_Catastrophic]

Originally Posted by samurai7694

but I just want to put it out there that I struggle to even come back to FFR (even though I instinctively check it every day now), because I feel a lot of old relationships have been killed off and some old friends I tried reaching out to either want nothing to do with me or see me in a bad light in some way. but I am thankful for the friends that I still have now

I may not be as well known as most of you outside of the old MP and pre FFR Apocalypse, but after reading everything on here this was what stuck out to me the most. I'd consider myself somewhat social, but for some reason whenever I come on here I become a ghost to even just trying to reach out to an old friend on here and just lurks. It's sad when I think about the countless hours and sleepless nights of fun I had with everyone of FFR Old. Maybe I'm just trying to fill a void inside me that I haven't noticed yet? Who knows.. but I think it's crazy how I've been trying to find something on here since 2012 that just seems to never come.

I guess what makes it harder is I haven't been able to play FFR since the end of 2017 as I was diagnosed with an extremely rare Auto-Immune disease (Stage 2 Dermatomyositis) which also affect my muscles and skin. So pretty much it'll be a long time before my fingers can speed through a chart as they could before. Though I may not have been the best, I enjoyed and talked about this site more than anyone would think.

My life may not have had many difficulties until I was randomly hit with this disease, so I"m not sure if I should post anything more lol

P.s. if anyone is interested in my condition or needs to reach out, please do! Also I posted a semi full story in another thread last year so I can link that if anyone is interested / put more updates from that point on here or there ... so lmk!