[ULTIMEGA]

An old joke, but a good one.

There's an old warship in the 1800's. It's out in the Atlantic ocean. The guy in the crow's nest is looking through his telescope and calls out "Captain! Enemy ship on the horizon!" The captain turns to his assistant and goes "Bring me my red shirt." The assistant brings him his shirt, the two ships cross paths, the battle ensues and it goes on all day, and the captain doesn't lose a single sailor. About 20 minutes after the battle, the assistant turns to his captain and says "Hey, Captain. I gotta ask you something. Before the battle started, you ask me to bring you your red shirt. Why is that?" The captain responds with "Because if I happen to be shot and was bleeding, my sailors would not notice the blood and they would continue to fight on." The assistant goes "Wow, that's pretty cool."

A couple weeks later, the guy in the crow's nest looks through his telescope and says "Captain! 20 enemy ships on the horizon!" The captain turns to his assistant and goes "Bring me my brown pants!"