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Forum: Writing and Literature 02-5-2011, 10:24 PM
Replies: 18
Views: 3,472
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Poem: In the sky

Hmm, Midnighter, I wanted to apologize, I now see the stanzas. I quoted your text before I read it. Now i'm looking at the original post and what do you know there are stanzas. Haha, sorry.
Forum: Writing and Literature 02-5-2011, 09:44 PM
Replies: 18
Views: 3,472
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Poem: In the sky

I'm glad I could help:) Yes, now I'm seeing the villanelle, haha, I'm sad I hadn't noticed it in the first place. Lol.
Forum: Writing and Literature 02-5-2011, 12:01 AM
Replies: 18
Views: 3,472
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Poem: In the sky

This is nice, I do have a few suggestions if you're willing to look at them. You have some random capitalization (highlighted in red). I have done that before too probably a typo, but as a reader I...
Forum: Writing and Literature 01-3-2011, 08:06 PM
Replies: 17
Views: 7,426
Posted By kitkat9
Re: A random poem I made up for my english class.

Hey no problem I love to help out. It really is looking good! Lol made great improvement in a day! Just remember nothing is ever finished:)
Forum: Writing and Literature 01-3-2011, 03:37 PM
Replies: 17
Views: 7,426
Posted By kitkat9
Re: A random poem I made up for my english class.

Ok I like the revisions, sounds much better, here are a few things you can change:

First Stanza: The last line is a little wordy, either take out "is" or "so"(maybe you could try parallelism, "the...
Forum: Writing and Literature 01-3-2011, 11:17 AM
Replies: 0
Views: 996
Posted By kitkat9
Poem: Cheap Cigarettes

Open to criticism:) Hope you all like it.

Cheap Cigarettes
by Katrina D

I saw you,
raised from the dirt ground
that your followers tread upon.
Looking down at sins that echo
through my...
Forum: Writing and Literature 01-3-2011, 10:59 AM
Replies: 17
Views: 7,426
Posted By kitkat9
Re: A random poem I made up for my english class.

I like your sweet and simple rhymning, until the last stanza. I completely agree with everything All_That_Chaz said, and I also feel that you can expand on the topic a little more. Go into how you...
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-22-2010, 08:46 PM
Replies: 34
Views: 3,876
Posted By kitkat9
Re: An Open Letter to Paris Hilton

Uhm, ok nothing is going on...and I don't understand at all when you say CoD is the only game that matters. Maybe you can enlighten me?
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-22-2010, 03:51 PM
Replies: 13
Views: 2,041
Posted By kitkat9
Re: crime and punishment

Heh, I completely agree. I was going to say the exact same thing:)
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-22-2010, 03:43 PM
Replies: 34
Views: 3,876
Posted By kitkat9
Re: An Open Letter to Paris Hilton

That is sooo unintelligent. How do you think your precious video games were made?! Through WRITING plots! Even creating creating and the game itself requires reading text. I mean some video games...
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-22-2010, 03:37 PM
Replies: 34
Views: 3,876
Posted By kitkat9
Re: An Open Letter to Paris Hilton

I don't care what anyone says I found this witty and strangely genius. Whether it's a real proposal or not it's quite phenomenal. Mead, I would marry you if this was my letter! Haha! :)
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-22-2010, 03:27 PM
Replies: 3
Views: 1,410
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Tokaru and the Story of the Lost Hat

This is a whole chapter? It honestly lacks story. It seems artificial in a way and kind of like a childish gameboy game. I think you should expand the plot much more, make it more creative, and you...
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-22-2010, 03:20 PM
Replies: 0
Views: 897
Posted By kitkat9
Short Story: I wasn't ready

This is a short story about a man. If you want to know more about this story-line you can ask. Hope you guys like it.


I Wasn’t Ready
By Katrina D.

It’s bitter, I say to myself. The taste in...
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-22-2010, 02:57 PM
Replies: 10
Views: 1,704
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Poem: Rythmic

Haha thanks, I really didn't mind reading them, they were both very nice and you're an exceptional writer.:) Thanks for the feedback!
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-21-2010, 01:04 PM
Replies: 4
Views: 1,627
Posted By kitkat9
Re: did this for school each part corresponds to a painting in "the voyage of life" b

I agree, you have such a strong voice then those come in and it was strange. I also feel that you use "and" a lot more than you need to (possibly go through and count how many times you say "and"). I...
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-21-2010, 12:47 PM
Replies: 1
Views: 927
Posted By kitkat9
Re: spiritual reading?

I have a question, what does that mean to you?
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-21-2010, 12:40 PM
Replies: 10
Views: 1,704
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Poem: Rythmic

Gotcha, well thats cool. I like stuff like that, I just don't often write it.
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-21-2010, 12:34 PM
Replies: 4
Views: 1,313
Posted By kitkat9
Re: lalala

This is really interesting. I woud suggest inputting paragraphs, without them the text seems overbearing. You also have very, very, very long sentences, and a lot of them tend to be run ons,...
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-21-2010, 12:15 PM
Replies: 10
Views: 1,704
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Poem: Rythmic

Ok, yeah, I'll try it out. Thank you :)
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-21-2010, 11:56 AM
Replies: 10
Views: 1,704
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Poem: Rythmic

Chaz, I understand what you mean, and when I say and "unknown reality" have you ever seen someone get really deep into the music? It's very passionate, between the person and the instrument, they...
Forum: Writing and Literature 12-20-2010, 11:36 PM
Replies: 10
Views: 1,704
Posted By kitkat9
Poem: Rythmic

This is a poem I wrote about an instrumental guitar player I saw in August. Hope you all like it.

Rythmic
by Katrina D.

Masculine fingers dance across chords
stringing each note along the...
Forum: Films and Television 05-24-2009, 12:16 AM
Replies: 14
Views: 1,638
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Angels and Demons

So is this movie recommended or not? I saw the first one and loved it. But I don't want to spend money on this movie if it's not worth it.
Forum: Films and Television 05-24-2009, 12:12 AM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,944
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Wolverine Origins

I think they meant to do that. I think that the point is to show how he became the hard "badass" that he is in the X-Men movies.
The movie was good, I saw it the first day it came out. It was...
Forum: Films and Television 05-24-2009, 12:12 AM
Replies: 13
Views: 1,944
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Wolverine Origins

I think they meant to do that. I think that the point is to show how he became the hard "badass" that he is in the X-Men movies.
Forum: Films and Television 05-9-2009, 12:42 PM
Replies: 25
Views: 2,644
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Star Trek

Ya. I went and saw the movie last night. It was long, but it was so worth it. The comedy isn't that hard to understand if you haven't seen the others, I have watched some of the older Star Treks, but...
Forum: Writing and Literature 05-7-2009, 10:24 PM
Replies: 26
Views: 2,989
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Black Market Blood

Uhm, sorry. Won't happen again?
Forum: Writing and Literature 05-3-2009, 11:31 AM
Replies: 22
Views: 2,584
Posted By kitkat9
Re: I Surrender //

Wow. This was a piece that really struck me. It's very powerful and it really does say something about the world. I love it.
Forum: Chit Chat 04-30-2009, 04:58 PM
Replies: 213
Views: 10,351
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Swine Flu.....

The Swine Flu really isn't that big of a deal. People are dying because low immune systems and they don't know how to take themselves to the doctor. I had the swine flu last week, I took some meds...
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-28-2009, 08:54 PM
Replies: 26
Views: 2,989
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Black Market Blood

I love the length of it, it's great. But, gosh, it's amazing still. When you publish this(and you better get it published) I'm buying a copy, and I'm going to tell people that I read the book as the...
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-28-2009, 04:56 PM
Replies: 12
Views: 1,411
Posted By kitkat9
Re: got incredibly bored so made this

It's good. It could use a little work, punctuation, and maybe a few different word choices. Just to make the flow a little better.

I'm offened though. Women aren't the only reason relationships...
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-24-2009, 11:58 PM
Replies: 6
Views: 1,275
Posted By kitkat9
Re: The Reasons

Just like Engler said it is something seen a million times, but don't take that too personally, we all have done it at least once in our lives.

I really like the flow of the poem. It would be...
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-22-2009, 12:29 AM
Replies: 26
Views: 2,989
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Black Market Blood

Oh my god! Talk about bringing the characters together!
One thing, I think you could you a little more description about what happened between Amanda and Brandon. So far I'm still loving it! And...
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-19-2009, 02:25 PM
Replies: 26
Views: 2,989
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Black Market Blood

I haven't replied for a while, but I read the third chapter. It was amazing! I loved it. And in the earlier chapters I was hoping that you would tie the four people together a little more, and you...
Forum: Films and Television 04-18-2009, 11:37 PM
Replies: 8
Views: 1,430
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Thought of Fast and Furious

I saw it like a few days after it came out, I really did like it. I mean some of the stuff was unnecessary. I liked the return of Dom. Over all I give it a 7 1/2-8.
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-15-2009, 08:52 AM
Replies: 37
Views: 3,424
Posted By kitkat9
Re: A poem that I had no idea what to title

Ok, I'm gettingsick of you people leaving comments on my profile. Look, I'm sorry. That is the first time I've ever done that, I just thougt it was neat, and a good mix of words. It's the first and...
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-10-2009, 06:18 PM
Replies: 37
Views: 3,424
Posted By kitkat9
Re: A poem that I had no idea what to title

Look, this arguement can go on for forever and a day. I would appreciate it if it could just be dropped. This is my work I'm sorry if everyone else would like to think other wise.

If you have...
Forum: Films and Television 04-10-2009, 10:24 AM
Replies: 24
9
Views: 1,860
Posted By kitkat9
Re: 9

Oh yeah, I saw a trailer for that. It does look good. It's kinda cool because my favorite/lucky number is 9. =D
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-10-2009, 01:08 AM
Replies: 37
Views: 3,424
Posted By kitkat9
Re: A poem that I had no idea what to title

Like a deer in headlights is a very common simile.

And music that had lyrics started out as poetry with instruments! Smart one.
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-10-2009, 12:25 AM
Replies: 37
Views: 3,424
Posted By kitkat9
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-10-2009, 12:23 AM
Replies: 17
Views: 6,322
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Resident Evil 4 Fanfiction XD

Muahahah! I knew it!8-)
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-9-2009, 11:49 PM
Replies: 2
Views: 1,196
Posted By kitkat9
Re: poem my brother wrote

Very nice. I really like it. And I'm sorry about your grandfather.

You had a simple typo-"And next to me, and empy seat." An

There is one line that I feel does not fit and that is, "So I can...
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-9-2009, 11:42 PM
Replies: 17
Views: 6,322
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Resident Evil 4 Fanfiction XD

Haha! Man on man funny stuff. That could be Leon and the Shaye dude haha.
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-9-2009, 11:04 PM
Replies: 26
Views: 2,989
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Black Market Blood

Lol. I understand, it's all cool. Just remeber to think like the reader. And I have many reasons to be liking this story so far. It is well put together, amazing plot, leaves me wanting more, and...
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-9-2009, 11:02 PM
Replies: 17
Views: 6,322
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Resident Evil 4 Fanfiction XD

I don't know about this. I mean, eh, this really isn't something I would read.

I has SO many grammar, spelling, and punctuation errors, but you explained your reasoning somewhat already.

So...
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-9-2009, 10:45 PM
Replies: 26
Views: 2,989
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Black Market Blood

Wow, I'm still loving it. This Darla chick makes me want to punch something lol.

Ok this simile really made no sense to me.
"Of course she didn't want Brandon knowing anything and the annoying...
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-9-2009, 10:21 PM
Replies: 21
Views: 3,032
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Empty

Hopefully.
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-9-2009, 08:50 PM
Replies: 21
Views: 3,032
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Empty

I have half the mind to go puke, but I won't. I liked it, it is well written, it is just flat out good.

I did see one thing, you had a very minor typo, something easily fixed.
"The next day I met...
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-7-2009, 08:54 PM
Replies: 26
Views: 2,989
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Black Market Blood

Lol, I know these things. I tried to turn in an essay I did in like, 30 minutes to my English teacher, to say it plainly, she was not impressed. She actually fumed at me, it was rather hilarious if...
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-7-2009, 07:38 AM
Replies: 8
Views: 1,191
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Insanely Blissful

Yes, I see that this is from a long time ago, but truthfully I really didn't feel a whole lot. I do like what you are trying to do with murder. It puts in a twist, most poetry i've seen is from the...
Forum: Writing and Literature 04-6-2009, 10:04 PM
Replies: 26
Views: 2,989
Posted By kitkat9
Re: Black Market Blood

Don't rush! If you rush it will be cheesy and do your best. It will come out when its finished, and completely finished...
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