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Funnygurl555 12-3-2019 11:15 PM

people w/ divergent political opinions
 
this isn't a politics discussion, dw guys

but i was wondering to what extent are you okay with having a relationship (platonic or romatic) with a person with differing political views?

personally i'm liberal and i'm fine being friends with people who are conservative, but i don't think i could be friends with alt-right people.

this just popped into my head because i realized i have a friend who... likes alt-right political "pundits," and that was... disappointing to learn? but i don't know if it means i should try to avoid said friend. i just can't fathom subscribing to those views. what i don't understand scares me.

edit: romantically my answers would be about the same, but i'd want to align on certain social views (e.g. gotta've been for same sex marriage, or for lgbtq+ rights in general)

XelNya 12-3-2019 11:47 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Funnygurl555 (Post 4703615)
this isn't a politics discussion, dw guys

but i was wondering to what extent are you okay with having a relationship (platonic or romatic) with a person with differing political views?

personally i'm liberal and i'm fine being friends with people who are conservative, but i don't think i could be friends with alt-right people.

this just popped into my head because i realized i have a friend who... likes alt-right political "pundits," and that was... disappointing to learn? but i don't know if it means i should try to avoid said friend. i just can't fathom subscribing to those views. what i don't understand scares me.

edit: romantically my answers would be about the same, but i'd want to align on certain social views (e.g. gotta've been for same sex marriage, or for lgbtq+ rights in general)

Platonic: For me things are on a view by view basis, you can think it's morally wrong for gay marriage, but if you're in the "should not be legal" camp I'd probably keep you at more of a distance for example. I know I'm a tad out in some areas of politics, namely social politics, but I think it's fun to chat about it.

Romantic: My current girlfriend and I are really similar, but I couldn't be with a strong alt-right person.

aperson 12-3-2019 11:53 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
Be weary of people whose beliefs aren't rooted in compassion for others. Cut people off if they show signs of progressing down a radicalization pipeline. Talk and synthesize ideas with anyone else.

Funnygurl555 12-4-2019 12:40 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
i had the worst dream last night that jordan peterson and ben shapiro were trying to sleep with me

that's what i get for making threads like this before i go to bed

Quote:

Originally Posted by aperson (Post 4703618)
Be weary of people whose beliefs aren't rooted in compassion for others. Cut people off if they show signs of progressing down a radicalization pipeline. Talk and synthesize ideas with anyone else.

wise words man

DaBackpack 12-4-2019 05:24 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
It all comes down to what your working relationship with this person is. (Friend, family, lover, etc.) Does this person's behaviors and attitudes affect your interactions with them in the relevant contexts. My coworker might be a Trump supporter but that doesn't factor in to how I present myself to him. But if he repeatedly talked about Trump and white supremacy in the office, that would make people uncomfortable and I'd report him.

Naturally our romantic expectations are higher and people generally expect strong value alignment with their partners. My mom and her ex-boyfriend were diametrically opposed politically and those specific kinds of values were very important to them, so they ended up annoying each other. One of my little sister's previous boyfriends was pretty far-right but she didn't care because her core values lay elsewhere. (She eventually broke up with him because he lived like an animal and wouldn't clean up after himself.)

So the answer to your question is personal. Usually you "feel it" before you notice it.

Deadlyx39 12-4-2019 06:19 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
I don’t talk about politics with anyone because it just drives people away from each other and creates toxic environments. I used to love talking about it, but now I’m of the opinion that politics don’t effect most 75% of our lives, so I don’t bother about it. Having different opinions from someone is okay and I’d be fine with it, just don’t talk about politics and talk about something else.

inDheart 12-4-2019 06:59 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
idt anyone should be taking the divergent series that seriously as the basis of a political system but

as for the actual question, there're a couple firm lines i'm not inclined to pretend don't exist, and i think having those can be fine. people purity test each other over more frivolous stuff already

SputnikOwns 12-4-2019 07:50 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
I'm a conservative and I assume leftists are good people with good intentions until they prove otherwise.
If someone can't show me that same baseline level of good faith and are instead condescending then they're not worth my time.

XelNya 12-5-2019 03:02 AM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by SputnikOwns (Post 4703640)
I'm a conservative and I assume leftists are good people with good intentions until they prove otherwise.
If someone can't show me that same baseline level of good faith and are instead condescending then they're not worth my time.

I respect it.

Moria 12-5-2019 05:55 AM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
Conservatives are on average more attractive. If I were a liberal or of any political alignment I would not have an issue with an attractive boyf-... significant other.

rayword45 12-5-2019 10:47 AM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Moria (Post 4703651)
Conservatives are on average more attractive


Moria 12-5-2019 12:29 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
i did say on average. that guy is an outlyer, he obviously doesnt represent the majority of goodlooking conservatives

still cuter than irrelephant republicans tho

choof 12-5-2019 03:36 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
I don't mind divergent political opinions as long as you're not a fucking dipshit
the main issues I have are with chuds and people who say shit like "I don't care about politics", which is really them just saying "I'm privileged and the status quo doesn't affect me personally"


Quote:

Originally Posted by Moria (Post 4703651)
Conservatives are on average more attractive. If I were a liberal or of any political alignment I would not have an issue with an attractive boyf-... significant other.

hmu

DossarLX ODI 12-5-2019 07:57 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
There isn't a black and white answer for this. However, if I notice someone obsessing over grouping people into two buckets/labels constantly, that's a huge red flag.

What does promoting anger and labeling do in a relationship where there's supposed to be mutual respect and commitment? It destroys it.

qrrbrbirbel 12-7-2019 02:54 AM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
My views are do no harm and take no shit.

Platonic, you only need the first

Romantic, both


I have a hard time making decisions based off other people's views though, cuz I haven't found anything that I passionately agree or relate with to say " I am this ism". Because of that I don't really think I have any say so long as it's not hurting me personally. They could be right or wrong, but at least they have something that is worth being right or wrong over.

M0nkeyz 12-7-2019 06:23 AM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
I think in purely platonic relationships it''s actually interesting to have friends with divergent political views. It allows you to have interesting discussions. What I cant stand are people that are completely unwilling to listen to other people''s opinions and views. I''m personally heavily left leaning by US standards (I live in the Netherlands). But I've had conservative friends in the past that have shifted towards more liberal viewpoints over time.

As for romantic relationships it''s entirely dependant on how much we actually talk about social issues.

Trumpet63 12-7-2019 12:33 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
Platonically: I'd like to think I can get along with anyone that has the same standards of evidence as I do and doesn't argue in a way that makes me angry. I think common interests are more often what starts friendships than common opinions, for me.

Romantically: Same standards as platonic, plus (1) I want absolute honesty, and (2) there are certain things I don't think I'll ever be able to prove or make a convincing argument about, but are still important to me, and when it comes to who I allow to hypothetically have deep influence on me and my future child, I think I'd have to align with them on those things.

Dinglesberry 12-7-2019 12:38 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
i dont think ive ever talked about politics with another person and i plan to keep it that way so my ideal person for both would be someone who doesn't care about politics

Anorak 12-7-2019 01:40 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
I honestly don't like having relationships with people that are extremists in either direction. The best people are the ones who put good thought and evidence into what they're opinions are. This may be shallow of me, but I don't believe I could happily be friends with someone with an extreme liberal or conservative agenda. Always being set on politics is something I've seen in a lot of people, and I just think of people better if they don't live their life and hate people based on whatever "side" they're on.

DaBackpack 12-7-2019 10:18 PM

Re: people w/ divergent political opinions
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by Anorak (Post 4703770)
I honestly don't like having relationships with people that are extremists in either direction. The best people are the ones who put good thought and evidence into what they're opinions are. This may be shallow of me, but I don't believe I could happily be friends with someone with an extreme liberal or conservative agenda. Always being set on politics is something I've seen in a lot of people, and I just think of people better if they don't live their life and hate people based on whatever "side" they're on.

Certainly political tribalism is bad, but I don't see the connection between these first two sentences. I think there are a number of people with radical perspectives that "got there" through experience, logic, and evidence--- e.g. Kant, Hegel, Marx, Nietsche. Not everyone is a political scientist but I'm not so inclined to dismiss people with strong convictions simply because they stray far from center

Tribalism "us vs. them" is a different issue entirely


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