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View Full Version : My brain is still trying to comprehend this.


Rediahs
October 21st, 2005, 05:55 PM
So it was 2:30 in the morning and I was absolutely starving. There was no place open on campus (except Tim Horton's, but doughnuts and coffee are not a thing for a completely empty stomach) and I'd just ate the last of my cottage cheese. There was no food left in my room, and I had an assignment due in the morning. ****.

So I decided to run to the grocery store (open 24/7) and buy some food. Good idea. I got some food. And there, sitting in the organic/health food aisle, was a carton of papaya juice. I had never tried papaya before, but I'd heard that it tastes somewhat similar to a banana crossed with an orange, and sweet like strawberries. So I picked it up and bought that too.

On my way home, I figured, if I'm starving and I have all this food with me, why not eat NOW? So I opened up the carton of papaya juice, ripped the seal off, and took a gulp - oh how refreshing. It was cold and sweet and -

and I smelled the obscenely offensive odour of puke. Vomit. Not just any vomit, but ROTTING vomit.

It took me a second to understand that the smell was coming from my carton of papaya juice. Unholy fruity heathen! A fruit that smells exactly like pungent vomit?

I thought, maybe it's spoiled, so I checked the expiration date, but it didn't expire until May next year. I thought, well, maybe I'm so starving that I'm not smelling correctly. I closed the carton and made my way home. I tried taking another sip but - eugh!! It was even more vile and disgusting smelling than last time, and once again distinctly reminding me of vomit.

I thought that maybe it was something wrong with the carton, so I thought maybe if I pour the juice into a cup it won't smell so bad. WRONG. It smelled even worse out of the carton.

By now it was stenching up my room, so when I realized there was nothing I could do to salvage this, I ran to the washroom to dump out the offending juice in the sink.

Now the entire washroom smelled like puke.

I was convinced that something was wrong with my juice. Maybe there is a certain type of bacteria that smells like vomit. Googling gave me no results. Finally conceding to the idea that maybe fruit CAN smell like vomit, I googled papaya and vomit.

... apparently, this is a distinct smell that papaya has. Not to say that all papaya smells like puke, but unless you get some really fresh, sweet papaya, it's going to be disgusting. And even then, the smell lingers a bit.

My entire world has been changed.

Fruit can smell like EXACTLY like vomit. And it doesn't have to be rotten. It just has to be not-excellent.

Moral of the story: don't buy papaya juice. My room is still a bit stenched up from last night. :\

Snapps
October 21st, 2005, 06:09 PM
But it's so cold, sweet, and refreshing.

Squeek
October 21st, 2005, 06:20 PM
Don't you know you should NEVER EVER go to a Grocery store when you're hungry?

It makes you buy more than you need.

~Squeek

Silver_Brian
October 21st, 2005, 06:25 PM
I was hungry until about 30 seconds ago.

psychic25
October 21st, 2005, 07:32 PM
I thought the end of your story was going to be that one of the store employees, in a drunken stupor, vomited all over the carton of papaya juice.

Your ending is weirder.

super-smashman
October 21st, 2005, 07:54 PM
Papaya juice = nasty. Got it.

Rediahs
October 21st, 2005, 07:57 PM
I thought the end of your story was going to be that one of the store employees, in a drunken stupor, vomited all over the carton of papaya juice.

Your ending is weirder.

I initially considered that as a possibility. However, the carton was sealed, and it became obvious that the juice was the source of the stench, not the carton. I don't think somebody barfing all over the carton would have made the juice smell. And the carton itself, closed, had no smell at all.

My ending is definitely weirder. ;)

180digi
October 21st, 2005, 07:59 PM
Or maybe someone just shipped a carton full of vomit to the grocery store.

Rediahs
October 21st, 2005, 08:02 PM
Or maybe someone just shipped a carton full of vomit to the grocery store.

But the stuff TASTED all right for a couple of seconds, until I noticed the obscene stench.

Recalling the last few times I've vomited, it never tasted fruity on the way up.

ToshX
October 21st, 2005, 10:41 PM
But it's so cold, sweet, and refreshing.
I can make an alternative to that for Chrissi.
---
Never had papaya juice, never plan to.

180digi
October 23rd, 2005, 11:50 AM
Or maybe someone just shipped a carton full of vomit to the grocery store.

But the stuff TASTED all right for a couple of seconds, until I noticed the obscene stench.

Recalling the last few times I've vomited, it never tasted fruity on the way up.

This is why I NEVER take chances with a product that prints the date you might expire.