me and jay are cool yeah?

~Tay <3

for ma FFR biffle
ayyee lubb joo




anyone else want a customized vid? just ask me!
But..I only do it for people I actually talk to on here
if you're a close friend, just ask me for one, and tell me what you want me to say. But...nothing ridicuous.
OH. And this is also a poll.

Should I tell Justin how I feel about him before he leaves?

yes?
no?
HELP! Any ideas on HOW to tell him? I somewhat trust most of you guys ;]

~Tay <3

It's 3:50 in the morning. I'm very tired, dazed, confused. There are too many questions racing through my mind right now. And they all lead to the same person: Justin. What's he doing right now? Why did he lie to me? Are we really friends, or is it just something in my head? Is someone trying to lie to me about him? WHY? I really believed in him, the way he spoke, how he was so good with his words. It made my legs go to jello at every single thing he said, and when he smiled. Which was a lot. I don't think he's a depressing kid. He laughs at everything and is one of the funniest people I know. He's also one of the most talented musicians I've ever met. I don't want to believe there's something wrong with him. But the words are hurtful and dangerous, and the more and more I hear negative shit about him, the more I just want to let go and give up. Every time I say I'm giving up, the more I fear I'm just falling for him harder. WHY? He's everything I'm against. Let's face it I can't hide from the truth anymore. He smokes too much weed because he thinks it gives him an edge when he's writing music. He likes being fucked up. He's an alcoholic, and he's only fucking seventeen! He flunked out of high school because he stopped caring. Now he's stuck going to some school for fuck-ups and I just can't tell him how I feel before he leaves. He's supposed to come back every other weekend, and if I even get remotely lucky, I'll see him maybe once a month. He comes back for his band, and his band only. Because you know what, they're like his brothers. Music is his everything; I know that for a fact. So why does he feel the need to get all fucked up just to make something GOOD? I know I'm a good writer, and I don't need drugs to be good. For someone who claims to be extremely school-stupid, he sure thinks WAY too much. When you write, it's supposed to come more from your heart, not your head. And the more and more I think about it, does he even HAVE a heart? Mr. "I go to parties and hook up with random drunk girls cause I'm bored as fuck." yeah, that's him. Shallow as a puddle. So WHY do I feel like I still love EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM? His eyes, his hair, the way he dresses, his gauges, his shortness, his braces, his lip ring, his car, the way he always says "what the FUCK?", the random freckles scattered across his face, the way he twirls the microphone on stage, his insistent need to pace a lot, especially when he's on the phone, his attitude, his instant gratification...SEE? I could honestly go on but I can't think straight. It's now 4:10 AM. I really should be sleeping. I should have done my AP US essays a month ago. School officially starts in 1 week. I'm not ready. I'm not ready to say goodbye. And I'm no way in hell ready to tell him. It's my secret. So....why am I telling you guys anyway???

7 Things I Hate [Love] about Justin:

1- he's vain.
2- he's loud.
3- he's wild.
4- he's clever.
5- he makes me laugh.
6- he makes me cry.
7- he makes me love him.

For the motherfucking record, I despise Miley Cyrus. But this song is stuck in my head. I saw it fitting.

~Tay <3
PS: She says 9 things in that song, not 7. Stupid bitch.

I deleted the other one.
Time for a new list! ^.^

#1~ I'm obsessed with riding my new bike.
#2~ I've fallen asleep in a mattress store.
#3~ I have 1600 songs on my ipod, I listen to every single one of them, and I know all the lyrics.
#4~ I'm afraid of roller coasters [It's a fear I'm trying to get over]
#5~ If there's one thing I hate more than anything, it's someone trying to be better than me when they're just insecure with themselves.
#6~ I have weight trouble.
#7~ I still love the Kaiba brothers from Yu-Gi-Oh. They are without a doubt my all-time favorite anime characters.
#8~ I get bug bites literally every day. I have too many to care to count them all. I have over 10 on my legs alone, though. Ouchies.
#9~ I fall asleep to acoutsic music.
#10~ I've learned to hate people quite easily, but all at the same time I can love just as freely.
#11~ I sometimes drive wrecklessly just to aggrivate people.
#12~ I've run out of ideas.

~Tay <3

SOOO
For those asking,
here is my fanfiction account

www.fanfiction.net/~stillcitylights

YAY!
I write fanfiction for naruto, devil may cry, harry potter, and yugioh.
but mostly harry potter; that's where my best stuff is.
And I also betaread, so if you have a fanfic you want beta'ed, I'm soo up for it!

~Tay <3