Kissing the sharp end of the blade
Feeling my blood run out my veins
I see red, peace and serenity
My heart grows cold
I stare blankly ahead to the unknown
Scared but numb to the fear
I look in the mirror and see nothing but empty eyes looking back
But the blade touches my skin and i no longer feel empty
I feel pain and fear
Just for a short time I don't feel numb
My heart may be bleeding but its the price I pay to feel something, anything
It may only be fear and pain
But that beats feeling only my cold empty heart

I know I should be strong,
But I won't, Because the pain
Is stopping me.

I make a plan to take some pills,
It shouldn't take long.
I write out some notes to all my
Friends to read when I am gone.

I plan it out so Perfectly,
I even set the date, I take them
One By one.

Now it's my turn to go.

I no longer want to be around
The people that I love, except
My boyfriend. All that I can
Think of is what's waiting above.

I cut my wrists with razor blades
To dull the pain inside,
But that can only last so long;
I don't want to be alive

When people are around,
People wouldn't understand,
So I don't make a sound.

As the days pass slowly
And the weeks creep by
I find myself obsessing
About ways that I could die.

I lay awake at night
Thinking of my pain.
There's no way it can get better;
I have nothing left to gain.

Suddenly thoughts of death
Are controlling my every move,
And battle with my mind
And I always seem to loose.